(Since there wasn't a new started when #15 wrapped up with max posts, here goes...)

Bipolar check in #16
You know the drill!

[Moose72]

Went to the gym and worked out this morning. Had coffee with my eldest son after that. Now spending time with my younger son. Daughter (middle) is at her boyfriend's not feeling well. She needs to come home early!

Waiting on pdoc's nurse to call back about meds.

[Unrigged64072835]

Wrote two poems today. Received my next (and I think final) lesson in my online course.

Went to PT and had a temporary crown replaced with a permanent one. The latter was painful even with anesthetic. Glad I decided to use it.

Will be making dinner soon. A recipe I haven't tried yet.

Took a lot of Vistaril to keep my anxiety down. It helped.

I have really bad anxiety

I had to throw away all my meds, including Ativan and Klonopin, because they weren't working. (Placebos? Idk... I have my suspicions) Well, only one left is adderall, but everyone is telling me not to take it anymore because it's causing psychosis

I just want someone to prescribe me some Xanax or Valium.

[Moose72]

Adderall and Valium together? I'd feel sick!

[bioChE]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

I have really bad anxiety


I had to throw away all my meds, including Ativan and Klonopin, because they weren't working. (Placebos? Idk... I have my suspicions) Well, only one left is adderall, but everyone is telling me not to take it anymore because it's causing psychosis


I just want someone to prescribe me some Xanax or Valium.

The Adderall will exacerbate the anxiety.

[Shamrockkid88]

Got up early went to breakfast with my older brother then work drank plenty of water with this lithium then work noticed I felt a little down but I put on some good music and rocked out while I chucked packages starting to notice the flood of thoughts is starting to quiet down that god! Hope everyone had a good day!

[scatterbrained04]

Not the greatest day. Been in bed since 5pm. Not good enough for anybody. I give up.

[Victoria'smom]

Hyper but depressed I guess. That's what T thinks. She's really pushing this IOP program. I told her I was paranoid she'd hospitalize me. She asked me if I needed it. I said no and she asked why not. So I told her why. She even asked if this is the worst she's seen me and I told her "No far from it." She was concerned about me leaving I think because she asked me my plans for the rest of the day.

Then h got his hair cut and we had dinner.

[Daonnachd]

All my meds have run out but the Wellbutrin. It'll be gone in two days. Bash on regardless

[bizi]

blue, you threw away your anti anxiety meds too.
bizi

[bizi]

call your pdoc in the morning.
bizi

[Naynay99]

Feeling kind of like crap today. Im tired, I just want to sleep forever.
Wondering if my good mood last week was just normal good or something else. A coworker friend had asked me jokingly if i did drugs one morning last week bc I was very hyper. i just thought I was feeling really good. Idk. Maybe I am just too hyper focused on trying to identify my moods. I sort of feel like i have no ****ing idea what or how I am feeling anymore.

I missed my support group yesterday bc took a nap after work. My house is a mess. I need to clean, do laundry, catch up on paperwork. And i am just stepping over the mess and pretending it's not there. I Had a weigh in this week and I gained back all the weight I had just lost. Ready to give up. Feeling pathetic and alone and Im scared that I always will be. I feel like it would be easy to just never ge out of bed. But I have to work tomorrow. Ugh. Maybe I should try using my sun lamp?

[gina_re]

Actually socialized at work today. But still emotional eating.

[bizi]

day at a time ladies.
((((HUGS))))
bizi

[b1ghr0ll3r]

Today has been the day from HELL ! Firstly I know I'm grumpy because I haven't been taking my meds properly (on the bright side haven't taken any benzos since Saturday night) & I've had about 4 hours of crappy sleep between 7-11am. For some reason I've got gives all over my right arm & forgot to go to the pharmacy & I feel like utter **** because I drank the last 6 nights in a row. Manic Monday ? No, wacky mental "I almost hit someone for staring at me on the bus" Wednesday...
Edit: going back on my meds tonight & gonna start Latuda in the nighttime instead of the day because it's made me lazy

you know what's always amazing about the day?

how quick the day goes, and how little I get done.

it is almost half 12 and all I have done is eat and post on here.

I need to get groceries at some point (hurrah for online shopping!), and this afternoon I am seeing my mental health worker to discuss a few things she wants to bring up- mainly around finances.

but I am going to talk to her too about steven's funeral and thoughts around that

[Shamrockkid88]

Slept like crap yet I've have some coffee already but it's not really bugging me. Periodontist appointment today which will not be fun at all ��. I've noticed that some of the "chatter" in my head has seemed quieter which is great. I hope everyone has a great day!

[Sad Mermaid]

I am getting used to waking up at 5:30 AM each morning. I was so excited about it, though, that I forgot to take my Synthroid for 3 days. I am now waiting until enough time passes since breakfast to take my normal dose. I need to remember to take it at 5:30 AM now. I hope I do not feel depressed from hypothyroidism.

Originally Posted by bizi

blue, you threw away your anti anxiety meds too.
bizi

Yeah, they were useless. I need a different benzo

[Coconutzo]

Things are falling apart.
My family. My partner. His family.
We are still ok, but it might just be because I swallow the bad feelings. Big sticky bubbles. My insides are a black hole. Poof there it goes. I feel like everything disappears once it is inside of me. I feel disconnected from all thoughts and feelings. They feel petty or non existent. I keep forgetting things, even as I'm saying them. I feel like I can't connect with anyone or anything.
I'm sure I'm depressed, but as I'm still going through the motions in also sure it's fine. I'm doing all of the right things. I've changed my eating and stopped drinking entirely. I go to the gym. I go to therapy and talk about my feelings. I go to yoga with my partner so we can connect and "find peace" together. I want to scream because nothing is right. I have always been nothing at all, and I just somehow realized it now.

Very upset. I'm trying to save the world using my mindreading and manipulation powers, and everyone is giving me s*** about it. No one realizes how dangerous the "others" are, or why I need to stop them. I am the chosen one, and if I die, then what becomes of this world? I'm always thinking 2 steps ahead

Otherwise doing okay. Got 4 hrs of sleep. Going to pick up my new Rx's, provided that the "others" don't find me and hurt me.

I got this! I am the world's only hope anyways

[hopeless2015]

Hey blue, very worried about you!

Having a good day so far. Got up at 5:30 and went to gym for first time today. I did 40 minutes on the treadmill, this was good for me. Tomorrow my friend is supposed to meet me and I will start working out with weights with her. I haven't had much physical activity in years, I work a desk job and have put on lots of weight. I'm hoping going to the gym helps me physically and mentally. My husband really thinks I need more activity in my life, I'm going to try my best to keep up with this. It certainly can't hurt me.

[Moose72]

My mom noticed that I've loss weight!

I paid my bills this morning.

I took a nap. Felt good.

child support he's owed for six months!
My ex finally paid the back

[Unrigged64072835]

Quiet day today. Tried fixing my good photo printer and it's not working. Wrote one poem for my online class. Slept because of anxiety and didn't prepare for dinner like I was supposed to, so I'll have to figure out something else to fix. Just bummed out right now.