[Moose72]

Can't get my kids motivated to get on the bus this morning. So much for my slow morning.

[bizi]

afraid to take 25mg of seroquel to help with sleep due to potential side effects of getting diabetes. Friend said the risk is there regardless of dose.
Plus I don't need to gain any more weight. I think I slept 7 good hours with out it last night. the is acceptable to me. I have in case I need it so will use it prn.
bizi

[Naynay99]

Feeling okay. Had a fun time yesterday at my friend's Star Wars night.
Had some trouble getting up today. But overall not bad I think. Idk. Still not exactly sure how I am? Hoping things get/stay better.
Wishing you all a good weekend.

I don't believe a 25mg dose is enough to trigger diabetes. My understanding is that it stems from high dosages over a significant length of time. There are numerous indicators of pre-diabetes that both your family physician and psychiatrist will recognise. This is why it is important to see them both and have your blood testing regularly.

There are also things being done now that may mitigate this. I personally take Metformin for the purpose of negating the chance of going diabetic. The bonus is that it also is helping me manage my weight.

Originally Posted by bizi

afraid to take 25mg of seroquel to help with sleep due to potential side effects of getting diabetes. Friend said the risk is there regardless of dose.
Plus I don't need to gain any more weight. I think I slept 7 good hours with out it last night. the is acceptable to me. I have in case I need it so will use it prn.
bizi

Has your pdoc requested to do any blood tests? Every time I start a new med, I get my blood tested the day before I start it and then a second blood test 2 weeks after. Then we compare cholesterol and blood sugar. We also compare weight changes. If anything changes in 2 weeks, we stop the medication

[RainyDay107]

Depression lifting...heading toward hypomania. Keeping an eye on my lack of sleep.

[bizi]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

Has your pdoc requested to do any blood tests? Every time I start a new med, I get my blood tested the day before I start it and then a second blood test 2 weeks after. Then we compare cholesterol and blood sugar. We also compare weight changes. If anything changes in 2 weeks, we stop the medication

This is good advice and makes sense. no blood work done.
bizi

4 more hours of work to go....I really don't want to be here. Down to my last $5 before payday on Wednesday. My Serve card gets my direct deposit two days early, so I can pay my wife my portion of the budget very quickly.

Today was a struggle to get out of bed. I just didn't want to go to work. My wife won't let me stay home even though I have plenty of time. I think she understands what my bipolar does to me, but wants to push me to be better than I am anyway. For weeks I haven't left the house on weekends. When I get home, I just want to be home.

My wife told me last night that despite all the weight she has lost, she still wants to lose another 40 LBS. My mind began to wander from that point and I imagined her leaving me for another man after she lost all the weight. Somewhere along the way in my thoughts she and I agreed to get a divorce and we moved on. She got with another man and they were married and she ran into me in public and saw how I haven't really changed and I'm still fat and miserable. Then she introduces me to her husband, and as they walk by she says under her breath how she didn't understand why she stayed with me so long. That was in a span of 90 seconds. Very vivid, almost like I was there. I cried a little but fortunately the lights were off as we were already in bed and almost going to sleep.

She didn't see me upset, but I have been crying more lately based on these kinds of vivid thoughts.

[LadyShadow]

Today is a good day. My appetite is off though. I am starving yet food makes me sick. I kind of don't know what to do. Been just drinking juice and water since I woke up, but I am really hungry. I just don't WANT to eat.

Other than that, I am feeling pretty relaxed and even. The rain is great and nice to listen to.

[scatterbrained04]

Well...saw pdoc...and I couldn't find words to say anything...again...I'm such an idiot...should have went with my gut and not even gone...

[Moose72]

Feeling dozey and relaxed from taking zyprexa in the morning instead of night. I'm out at Starbucks with a friend but I'd rather be sleeping.

Friday lunch was good. Well the conversation was; the meal was so-so.

[jacky8807]

got my hair done and ate some Brazilian food
still going on 0 sleep and feel better!

just recovered from a horrible emotional suicidal low but starting to feel it coming back. too many people at home trying to invade my space.

[Moose72]

Just home. Stripped off clothes put on PJs and started a load of lAundry. Yay

[lola0987]

Still in depressed state. Still a little paranoid but not horrible. I haven't self harmed in 2 days. So better

[Daonnachd]

Not doing well, haven't been for a while, and now it looks like my ECT is getting cancelled.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by neodk

4 more hours of work to go....I really don't want to be here. Down to my last $5 before payday on Wednesday. My Serve card gets my direct deposit two days early, so I can pay my wife my portion of the budget very quickly.

Today was a struggle to get out of bed. I just didn't want to go to work. My wife won't let me stay home even though I have plenty of time. I think she understands what my bipolar does to me, but wants to push me to be better than I am anyway. For weeks I haven't left the house on weekends. When I get home, I just want to be home.

My wife told me last night that despite all the weight she has lost, she still wants to lose another 40 LBS. My mind began to wander from that point and I imagined her leaving me for another man after she lost all the weight. Somewhere along the way in my thoughts she and I agreed to get a divorce and we moved on. She got with another man and they were married and she ran into me in public and saw how I haven't really changed and I'm still fat and miserable. Then she introduces me to her husband, and as they walk by she says under her breath how she didn't understand why she stayed with me so long. That was in a span of 90 seconds. Very vivid, almost like I was there. I cried a little but fortunately the lights were off as we were already in bed and almost going to sleep.

She didn't see me upset, but I have been crying more lately based on these kinds of vivid thoughts.

You write about your wife often; she is very important to you.
We all have some degree of a fear of loss.

Just a couple of ideas after reading your post.

My husband and I "diet" together. We don't lose weight exactly the same and we need a different caloric intake, etc. He eats things I cannot eat. Yet, we are "together in spirit" in our endeavor. He is not very overweight. We have both lost weight enough to go out and buy some new clothes together.
We also have a "date" at least every week. We share many interests. With all we do together, there isn't time to get interested in a relationship outside of our marriage.

Breathe some life into your marriage if you are concerned she may want to leave. Show her you are interested in her and you love her.


WC

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by vertigo

Not doing well, haven't been for a while, and now it looks like my ECT is getting cancelled.

So sorry.

Did your insurer cancel approvals/coverage?

I likely cannot imagine how devastating this may be for you right now.

What does this mean for you?


WC

[Unrigged64072835]

Roof is leaking pretty badly in the living room and my home office. Roofer isn't coming out until Monday and we have buckets everywhere. At least we were able to get a loan to have the roof redone. Really want them to fix it soon because the ceiling is detailed and we'll have to replace that too before too long. We may still have rain today so everything is left out.

Other than that a long slow day. Had anxiety again and tried to lie down for a while. Kind of down. It's like we can't have fun and a crisis always happens afterwards.

[Wild Coyote]

I'd had a reasonably good day yesterday. It was sunny and warm outside.
Went to a nearby quaint city to spend some time. Did a lot of walking. Went to a movie. Out to dinner. A special day with DH. (It took a lot of effort on my part, as the depression went along with us for the day. )

Today is cloudy, chilly, raining. Joints ache. Not very motivated. Again.

I hope everyone has a good weekend.

WC

[Daonnachd]

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

Did your insurer cancel approvals/coverage?

What does this mean for you?WC

To be more accurate, it's just my next ECT appointment that's been cancelled. At some point it will get rescheduled, but for now I feel abandoned.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by vertigo

To be more accurate, it's just my next ECT appointment that's been cancelled. At some point it will get rescheduled, but for now I feel abandoned.

Oh, I guess I had misinterpreted your post.

Even a single cancellation has to be a "letdown" when you're already struggling.


WC

[Naynay99]

Doing okay.
TGIF. I really want to crawl into bed and waste some time doing mindless things.
I am going to try to get ouT some this weekend.
but I really just want some time to be able to do whatever or nothing at all. Let the crazy out for a few hours and not feel like I have to try to be more okay than I am.

Have a day everybody.

[gina_re]

Made it through the day. I worked hard during the week so that today I could slack a little. Now that work is done it's time to clean up before my sister and nephews get here and then go get some tacos! Have a good weekend everyone!

[vjdragonfly]

Originally Posted by vertigo

To be more accurate, it's just my next ECT appointment that's been cancelled. At some point it will get rescheduled, but for now I feel abandoned.

(((Vertigo)))
Get through it one day at a time, best of hopes for you.