Family Acceptance and/or Support?

Do you find your family accepts you/your illness(es)?
Better yet, do they support you?


WC

Yes, mine accept it. My nuclear family is cool with it; they've all seen me in various states and couldn't deny it if they wanted to. My wife is OK with it as long as I stay on my meds. She's been with me through more than a decade of being diagnosed, and has been through hell as a result. Regardless, she has stuck with me. My kids don't know anything other than I take medication to keep me healthy. They aren't really old enough to grasp the ins and outs, and there's no real reason for them to know at this point. I'm sure I'll tell them at some point, but now is not that time.

My mother experienced severe denial at first, she's from the MI doesn't exist / Pray it away generation...

I gave her some of my most horrid posts to read through tho, and that set her straight.

Generally my family is quite accepting and supportive, everyone always knew I was a nutter, a pdoc was just kind enough to give it a name.

TBH, I didn't feel very supported at first, but that's cause what I was wanting (someone to talk to, a shoulder to cry on) wasn't what I was getting. What I was getting was less chores, ramped up free child care, and solitude or distraction, PRN.

When I recognized their support for what it was, I became much more appreciative and no longer mourned for the type I didn't have... I managed to get that somewhere else anyway.

I'm estranged from my family - father died several years ago from cancer and never did have a funeral, mother resents me and siblings only stir pot every few years by contacting me through my wife.

My wife loves and supports me, but I think I've driven her to the edge one too many times. And by that I mean she's told me in fights - where we say the darnedest things - that she's prayed I would just leave her. We've been married for 15 years and I'm confident I've been bipolar all of those years - actually well into my youth and it went without a diagnosis based on my early behaviors as a teenager.

My wife will also be the first to admit she is an enabler, and for far too long allowed certain behaviors to go unchecked for a good while. I was also a good hider and could rationalize everything or so I thought.

My kids know nothing other than their father takes "happy pills" and I've been better to them over the last year than any other time of their life. That's kind of sad when I think about it. The one thing I wish I was more of is present in my children's lives. I'm sort of there, but knowing what they've had to deal with second or third hand through my wife and her family is heartbreaking at times.

My in-laws took me in as their son. I love them for it but they support from afar. We don't really get into my diagnosis or what it means for the wife and kids. My mother-in-law was there for me when I admitted myself for overnight observation after a suicide attempt. My sister-in-law and her husband as far as I know do not have any direct knowledge of my bipolar. I'm sure they would be supportive but my wife tends to keep information about my condition private (as she should) from anyone that doesn't need to know.

And here I am, ready to tell my employer.

My mom has been amazing since my diagnosis. She does everything she can to be supportive and to make sure I can get the help I need. My boyfriend is also very supportive. I have put him through a lot and he still stands by my side. My daughter is too little to know what's going on. She just knows that mommy's brain gets sick sometimes and sometimes I need some extra space and quiet.

My extended family (siblings, parent, etc.) is complicated. Aren't they all?
There's a lot of alcoholism and undiagnosed anxiety/depression (including BP-2)/PTSD. People are very limited in their abilities to reach out to others.
Everyone is struggling.

I am the only one to seek professional help. Others deny any need for help.
They continue in very dysfunctional ways.

I get a little acceptance from my mother and one sister. They offer a little support, too.

I get neither/ none from others. Others are just hostile, with everyone.
(It would be worse if I talked about a BP diagnosis. None of them understand BP and accuse serial killers, etc. of being "bipolar." Neither do they understand that they, too, would likely have a BP diagnosis--at least -- if they sought help.)

I get acceptance and support from my husband. He also deals with BP-2 and has been very stable for 10 years. His meds work for him. He does not suffer the deep and long depressions I suffer. I don't know what I'd do without him.
We could both use some support.

(His family is more open-hearted and do not have other agendas going on. They are thrilled to see us. They are helpful if they can be. They are a more cohesive family unit.)

It has taken me many years to accept the fact that a large part of my family may never find acceptance and/or support in their hearts. They have their own struggles. (And yes, I have always lent a great deal of support.) I need to let go of the hope they can be something other than themselves and accept them as they are.

I hope to read many have found acceptance/support.


WC

EDIT: My family is "crazy-making." A year ago, one sister has "banned" me from all future events at her house simply because I was in too much pain to attend a prior event at her house. There is no talking with her about her feelings, etc. The "ban" continues. The family system is too dysfunctional to put these types of things "in check." It's possible the "ban" is a gift to me.

One reason I'm on this site is that my partner doesn't really believe or understand or want to understand my mental illness. He thinks I'm just lazy, even though I hold down a high school teaching position in a high powered school district. He doesn't get that the job takes all my energy just to survive it, and I don't have much to give when I'm home. He feels neglected. Thank God I don't have kids. I don't think I'd be emotionally there for them. But I can be there for the kids at school, because that's where I put my energy.
He is has unmedicated bipolar, which is a real ***** to live with. He's also a narcissist. Why do I stay? Who knows. Really. I don't know why.

i live with my parents, as an adult. before that, i was living in a little apartment they bought for me ((not popular in that neighborhood, lol...so I'm here...)).

its...interesting. they're basically well-educated, 21st century hippies, so they give me more space than a lot of families do for the mentally ill. i am expected to take my medication and try to do --something-- not necessarily a j-o-b (I get disability, thank goodness), but..something. we dont talk about the ins and outs of it all, largely because im stable now and "recovering" as much from 10 years on the fringe of society as from my..."affliction." (official diagnosis: Bipolar I. community diagnosis: Schizophrenia).

im blessed beyond measure. when I was younger and started having problems, my parents weren't so supportive. they thought i was a brat and a loser. :-( oh well. we've reconciled now, and im happy to have their (extensive, considerable, amazing) support.

My husband and daughter accept and support me. I haven't told anybody else in my family except my brother (who could care less) and my husband's stepmother. I don't think the rest of my extended family would accept it.

When I started getting symptoms a few years ago. I was diagnosed bipolar 1. I called and told my mom (I did not live in my birth state). Then she would tell me to move back and I said I'd think about it. Well in the middle of 2013 I did move there with my daughter. It was terrible! I tried to go over some basic info on bipolar. My mom had her back to me. Her husband starred at the tv. I have an aunt that tried but anytime I was excited a little she would ask if I was ok. I finally told her not to mention MI to me again! She just didn't get I could be having a down day without being suicidal. Now when it came to the reason I moved back. My mom wanted me not to tell extended family. Like I just woke up one day and missed my family in Oklahoma and wanted to move back. Oh no this was not the case. I was newly diagnosed and I was not doing well. She didn't want me to say "because I'm sick" lol. I have a older daughter now 19 years old. We were having a hard time communicating and getting along back then. I was first hospitalized after I moved. The second time I was hospitalized my mom told me she was really tired of doing "this". And I needed to ask someone else to watch my younger daughter (10 years old) next time. So I was all alone dealing with "accepting the diagnoses and what did I do to deserve this?"
Now my mom will call and ask how I'm doing but that's about it. She just wants me to say "ok". She doesn't want to hear the heavy. I have to tell her I have limits. I do not visit her often or stay long for the visit. I have four sisters. One on my mom's side. We speak but are not close. The other three are on my biological dad's side. They all have bipolar too. One is on and off meds. The other two just smoke weed to deal.
My mom's husband just started calling me sometimes and check in. But him and my mom are very uncomfortable talking about bipolar. My now 19 year old daughter and I have came along way. I can talk to her some but limit as to not overwhelm her. I deal with most on my own. I do not go to therapy because of co-pay percent. I'm a survivor so it's ok.

Well...they aren't unsupportive...but they kind of don't want to really talk about it either. At least not in depth. They have no idea how poorly I function at times.

No. Sometimes they even treat me like trash because they don't care to understand me

At least I have support online, and I have a therapist... so I've got enough support. My family doesn't matter because they've never supported me through anything, so I'm used to it

My immediate family knows. My dad, well I haven't talked to him since IP last year because of what he told me when I ended up there. So I don't thing he is supportive. My mom, well she was there everyday when I was there despite us having difficulties with each other. I was extremely grateful. She doesn't quite get it, but she's been trying. She now has a coworker with bipolar disorder and she has been asking her a lot of questions to get a better understanding of what I'm dealing with and it really has helped. My sister, I don't think she knows too much about it, but she is supportive. She came with my nephew to visit me last year too when in IP. I've told a few cousins, and that's about it, not too much negativity on my end. At least with my generation, the "elders" I don't bother going into it.

you know how some people will try to mess with a person who is high or tripping on drugs? like intentionally screw with them to freak them out? yeah my mom did that to me when I was in the middle of a psychotic break. (not drug related)
when I came down from the psychosis she berated me .
my mother is friggin insane

I'm blessed to have awesome family support. They don't really get what BP is all about, but nobody who doesn't have it can understand anyway. They're always there for me no matter what. My husband always was, too.

MI runs rampant in my family. I have been one of the high functioning ones though. Some of us are doctors and engineers. Some of us are homeless and addicted to drugs. There is not a lot of gray area.

My husband's side of the family is no less touched by MI.

So you can say we all talk about it. Supportive or not depends on who you talk to and who is being talked about.

My uncle just died of alcoholism. I have a cousin that lives in a wash in California (essentially homeless and on drugs). My uncle and cousin have just been locked up for self medicating. My grandmother was one of the first to receive electro shock therapy. I have an uncle that has lived on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico for 30 years. Alone. My mother and aunt have severe depression and anxiety.

On and on, I have huge Slavic-Catholic and Scottish-Catholic families. we are all mad here!

My pdoc says there is a clear correlation between families with a lot of alcoholism and mental illness, esp. bipolar and MDD.

In that case, it seems there would be less support to begin with, as a certain percentage of people would be caught up in either alcoholism and/or mental illness.


WC

I have a huge amount of mental illness on both parents sides as well. with a hx of mental hospitals going back.
has not helped support at all lol

My husband supports me 100%, even if I've done some awful things. My mom doesn't think that anxiety disorders exist and that my bipolar is caused from my diet (I've been vegetarian for years, and a huge chunk of time as a vegan).

My daughter is the only one in my family that totally accepts and supports my BP-2 diagnosis. She's 18 now but I feel for years we've been in the trenches fighting together. My mom accepts it when it is convenient and my sister is very hostile. She thinks I am lazy and in a rut and can think my way out of it. My adopted brother has paranoid schizophrenia and gently checks in with me each day and that means more to me than almost anything especially since there is not much he can do. So pretty much my support system is my daughter, my brother, my therapist and my pdoc. I've wished for years it was different and still haven't accepted the reality of it.

My family:
My mom - wasn’t supportive until suicide got brought up and the real threat of losing me to this happened. Now she makes sure I have my meds.
My Dad- Use to hide my meds when I visited. Now’s in the camp if you REALLY need them take them. He feels it’s a poverty thing. If I wasn’t poor I wouldn’t have BP
Sisters- Use it against me
Husband- too supportive.
Son- knows we take meds for BP
SIL- thinks I’m crazy but takes our son when we ask her too. Covers for me to her mom.
MIL- Thinks of it like a religion. If that’s what makes us feel better then okay
FIL- Has asked me to make sure none of us die to Sui. However we need to accomplish that he’s behind.
CIL- Thinks we’re just whiny brats.