New Here- I Just Want Someone to Understand

Where do I even start? I have been getting worse over the last two years, angry outbursts, lashing out at everyone, and seclusion for myself from people I thought I loved. I have been through 20 or more jobs in 1 year and a half. I lost count. My family doesn't get it. I feel myself getting worse everyday, and everyone says to "get over it" or "mind over matter" but it just isn't that easy. Anyone else experience this issue?

Hey. Just wanted to say welcome.
I'm sorry you have been having such a tough year.
I think it's common for family and friends not to get it or think after a while one should be able to just get over it already. Hell I feel like I know better and yet I still sometimes tell myself that, self berating myself for not just thinking my way out of this shiit or whatever.

I don't really have much advice but I do know that the crappy stuff doesn't last forever and there are still good days ahead even if it doesn't feel that way right now. Do you see a doctor or therapist or anything? You say it's been getting worse- Have you found anything to help at all??

Sending you some good thoughts. Hang in there.

I understand and I know it's not something you can just "get over". I know how strong you must be to make it as far as you have while dealing with all this.

((Hugs)) I totally get it. I've been diagnosed for 12 years and my family just started taking me seriously last year when I lost yet another job and decided to shoot for SSI. Throughout my 20's I was told to "get off your lazy ***", or better yet, "its all in your head" (god I hate that one). Amongst this forum however you will find a lot of support from people that DO get it. I'm very sorry you're going through this.

I see both a Therapist and a Psychiatrist. But no matter what medicine they try, I continue to get worse. It's like medicine has zero affect on me.

Lots of good sympathy in the comments here. I don't have much to add, but wanted to say welcome to PC. You'll find lots of compassion, acceptance, and shared experience here.

Welcome to PC!

I am sorry for what you are going through. I hope we can help somehow.
Please make yourself at home here.

Hope to see you around the forums.


WC

Are you on any meds.

Yes. Lamictal and Adderal. I take clonazepam on occasion

If you have BP, that's a pretty light combo. Have you ever tried cutting out the Adderall for a day or two to see if it could be causing the aggression? It's a pretty well known possible side effect. Adderall is easy to go onto and off of, as the half-life is so short it needs no titration in either direction.

I only just started the adderal two days ago. Other wise I would try it, but these symptoms have gone on a lot longer than that. They had me on 6 different meds all at once last fall. I've been diagnosed with Bipolar-unspecified, panic disorder, ADHD, PTSD, and Generalized Anxiety Disorder.

Why did they cut out all the other meds and not replace them with anything?

Extremely long story, but I'll try to keep it short. When I started seeking help last year, I went to the first psychiatrist I could get in to. She didn't even diagnose me. She took 10 minutes to write a few things down. ( my primary care had been managing my medicine) and then gave me all the meds and sent me on my way. After two months they sent me a letter saying she had left the practice and it was up to me to find someone else. I saw my new psychiatrist 2 weeks ago. I haven't had any medicine since December up to now. It took that long to get in. I guess he is trying to take things slow? I see him again the 16th.

Good luck and be patient with the meds. It took a lot of trail and error to get my combo right. The only thing now is a tweak here and there. My insomnia meds change from time to time but that's about it. You will get there!