[ShanDoll]

Do any of you struggle with paranoia? Just the fact that I recognize that I am paranoid sort of excludes any diagnosis of psychosis. But does any one else struggle with paranoia.

I find myself wondering if my boss has installed a camera to watch what I am doing. Or that my husband somehow monitors my phone or car. Or the big one is that everything I say people think is off/ abrasive/ weird/ too much. At work, I really feel that and sometimes think the team I work on is trying to push me out and that they are all just pretending to like me. That my boss hates me but just can't let me go.

UGH

Yeah....I relate to a lot of that.

[rwwff]

Originally Posted by ShanDoll

Do any of you struggle with paranoia? Just the fact that I recognize that I am paranoid sort of excludes any diagnosis of psychosis. But does any one else struggle with paranoia.

I wouldn't worry about the label of psychosis one way or another. I recognize that my paranoia is logically stupid, but without the AP, I believe it anyway, and believe it in a way that distorts everything I think about. In fact, I think the hardest thing I ever did was showing up for that first appointment with a pdoc (because they are who my paranoia revolves around), I knew I was doomed by going, certain I'd be captured and locked away, but I also knew logically I could go no further without.

The difference with the abilify, even the modest 5mg dose, is that now the paranoia is mostly gone. It does seep through every now and then, but even if it made me skip a dose, the AP has such a long half life, I'd come back to my senses before it dropped too low.

The question I have now, is how often should I tolerate it nibbling at me, vs the annoying side effects of the AP (restlessness mostly); and is it legit to just ask the doc to bump up the AP to the 10mg setting, or should I even want such a thing?

40+ years of paranoia mostly gone, now I'm greedy.

[Victoria'smom]

Yep and it doesn't exclude you from a DX. of psychosis. An antipsychotic helps with those feelings, not fully but helps.

[bukowski06]

I have observed these paranoia beliefs before. These feelings could go on for more than a year or longer if left untreated. Even if you're aware I don't think it lessens the emotional reaction to it, unfortunately. If you're already dx is it possible to talk w Dr.?

[Tkb1966]

When i was fairly newly married and just had our new born son, the phone rang and I answered the guy on the other end knew my name and acted like he was a good friend of ours so I didn't ask who he was at first, the he proceeded to describe in detail my husband and I sex the night before. Things he couldn't have known unless he was watching. We lived in a one bedroom apartment and just days before I had seen the maintanance worker for the apartments and was shocked to se it was a guy I had dated one time in hs. I was very paranoid and freaked out because he would have the ability to spy on us. (This was in 91 so not sure what tech would be used) so anyway always paranoid now that people are watching me or know what I'm thinking know what I've done. And always think those that have passed on are watching me.

Originally Posted by Tkb1966

When i was fairly newly married and just had our new born son, the phone rang and I answered the guy on the other end knew my name and acted like he was a good friend of ours so I didn't ask who he was at first, the he proceeded to describe in detail my husband and I sex the night before. Things he couldn't have known unless he was watching. We lived in a one bedroom apartment and just days before I had seen the maintanance worker for the apartments and was shocked to se it was a guy I had dated one time in hs. I was very paranoid and freaked out because he would have the ability to spy on us. (This was in 91 so not sure what tech would be used) so anyway always paranoid now that people are watching me or know what I'm thinking know what I've done. And always think those that have passed on are watching me.

That is so creepy....what a jerk! Did the voice sound like your ex? I worry I'm being watched because some azzhole on social media wrote me some stuff that made it sound like I was and he had "tapes" of me. It was really unsettling but I've come to accept it as possible and not worthy of stressing since I can't change it. I also think I'm being watched by those who have passed on.....usually it's a pleasant feeling but one particular person was sinister when living so when I get the feeling they are around it's not good at all.

[Tkb1966]

Originally Posted by ElsaMars

That is so creepy....what a jerk! Did the voice sound like your ex? I worry I'm being watched because some azzhole on social media wrote me some stuff that made it sound like I was and he had "tapes" of me. It was really unsettling but I've come to accept it as possible and not worthy of stressing since I can't change it. I also think I'm being watched by those who have passed on.....usually it's a pleasant feeling but one particular person was sinister when living so when I get the feeling they are around it's not good at all.

I don't remember if it sounded like him because I wasn't thinking about him at the time so I just don't know. I am paranoid all the time now though about hotel rooms and staying at peoples homes. I worry that my therapist can so how see me when im not with him. I know that one is far fetched but im pretty much paranoid about a lot of things.