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#1
Oct 16, 2017, 09:46 AM
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Seriously though. Is this as good as it gets? Do I just get to live my life at 75% capacity of what it used to be? I’m sick of this ****. I want to be able to function normally. I wish people would stop telling me to find a new normal. This is unacceptable. My brain won’t work. The only way I can get it to work is if I take large amounts of stimulants and weed. When I do that I can actually get a moment of clarity. I can’t do that all the time though. I want my old brain back. Before all these meds and nervous breakdowns. I want my photographic memory back. I want all my memories back. **** all this ********.
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 99fairies, Anonymous45023, boogiesmash, Faltering, north-polar-coaster, Purple,Violet,Blue, Shazerac, Tryingtobehappy5, UpDownMiddleGround, WildcatVet
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 UpDownMiddleGround
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#2
Oct 16, 2017, 09:51 AM
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(((HUGS))) I wish none of us had to deal with all the mental crap that we have to deal with. It makes every single thing so much more difficult. I'm always questioning what reality is. I don't have any words to help you but I just wanted to say that I am here to listen.
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Dx: Bipolar 2, Anxiety disorder, Adjustment disorder with mixed anxious mood. Medicine: 40mg Latuda, 35mg HydroXYZ Past Meds: 20mg Latuda, 150mg Seroquel XR, 50mg Topiramate (Trokendi XR), 25mg Vraylar, 25mg buspirone  You live and you learn
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| WildcatVet
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#3
Oct 16, 2017, 09:57 AM
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I hear ya. I'm not often happy with my new "normal" I want my brain back too!! Dammit!
__________________
 Eat a live frog for breakfast every morning and nothing worse can happen to you that day! "Ask yourself whether the dream of heaven and greatness should be left waiting for us in our graves - or whether it should be ours here and now and on this earth.” Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged Bipolar type 2 rapid cycling DX 2013 - Seroquel 100 Celexa 20 mg Xanax .5 mg prn Modafanil 100 mg 
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| 99fairies, WildcatVet
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| 99fairies
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#4
Oct 16, 2017, 10:02 AM
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Hugs. It sucks big time. I don’t know how many times I’ve asked for my intelligent brain back.
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| WildcatVet
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#5
Oct 16, 2017, 10:50 AM
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I am still reasonably good at my job but I used to be a top performer. It's been so long since I had no fog I can hardly remember what that's like. But I used to perform at a very high level even with the fog. Now I feel like I am faking it half the time.
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| |Up and down |And in the end it's only round and round |Pink Floyd - Us and Them | |bipolar II, substance use disorder, ADD |lamictal, straterra | |
| WildcatVet
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#6
Oct 16, 2017, 11:26 AM
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I was going to answer about is this as good as it gets...and it just got worse...
Where's that cuss thread when I need it???
__________________
 Bipolar l/Rapid/Mixed/Depression/Anxiety Disorders lamotrigine 100mg 2x/day Vraylar 6mg 1x/day methylphenidate 10mg 3x/day bupropion XL 200mg 2x/day bupropion IR 174mg 1x/day buspirone 30mg 2x/day quetiapine 50mg 1x/day I'm 50 Shades of Bipolar and I have no safe word... |
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#7
Oct 16, 2017, 01:40 PM
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Is this as good as it gets? Nope.
Sometimes it gets worse and stays there. |
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#8
Oct 16, 2017, 01:55 PM
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I refuse to accept a new normal. I mean, I have made changes to my lifestyle - mainly around sleeping and having accomodations at school to turn things in late. But I had the opportunity to study in Cairo and I went for it. I'm here right now, living my dream to study Arabic. This is coming from someone who spent weeks and weeks in hospital many times in the past few years. At least for me, it's possible to live the life I want. I just need to pay attention to my basics: sleep, food, stable routine.
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dx: schizoaffective bipolar type; OCD; GAD rx: clozapine, clonazepam PRN |
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#9
Oct 16, 2017, 02:54 PM
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Good man. I try to manage my decline just like you: regular exercise, regular sleep, stress reduction, absolute adherence to my med schedule.
You'll go far. |
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#10
Oct 17, 2017, 07:27 PM
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Quote:
She’s a woman.
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Meds: Latuda, Lamictal XR, Vyvanse, Seroquel, Klonopin Supplements: Monster Energy replacement.  Also DLPA, tyrosine, glutamine, and tryptophan
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#11
Oct 17, 2017, 08:20 PM
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Quote:
__________________
Diagnosed as having Bipolar II on 25 Oct 2017 Taking: Risperidone 1 mg, Lamotrigine 25 mg  Riding on the bipolarcoaster since 1983 |
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#12
Oct 17, 2017, 10:27 PM
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If I can get rid of anxiety, I’ll take it. Still building up the lithium dose, waiting to get to therapeutic
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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