[Miss Laura]

Ok things have been getting on top of me and I have went into grin and bare it mode

1. My Mum had a stroke 21st Nov I witnessed the whole thing. It was a serious stroke which has left her paralyzed down her right side and unable to talk. She is in a rehab centre after a month in hospital. I'm heartbroken and cry most nights as I'm scared for my Mum who is fiercely independent at 61 years old

2. I stopped my meds 2 months ago. I feel no different. My mood is good I'm not manicy or depressed. I've been told it's probably cause I'm running about to the hospital etc that I'm on energy

3. My Dad slipped on ice on 17th Dec and broke his wrist. Needed an op to insert a metal plate into it. Had op on 27th Dec and is mending well

4. My family is at war over stupid things cause we are all stressed out

5. I find out last week my psychiatric nurse who I see monthly is retiring and I might have to be discharged which means I lose both my nurse and worker as worker works under the supervision of nurse. This will happen in March and in the UK your allocated these professionals. Which leaves me with a GP and Psychiatrist who I see whenever not often and every 6 months

6. Tonight I have had a 1 hour crying proper crying spell where I was upset about my Mum, and everything above. Plus to top it off I hurt myself quite a bit cause I wanted it all to stop. Now in 10 hours I see psychiatry for my 6 month review. He only ever spends 10 mins if that with me. I'm not sleeping haven't been for over a week.

Question do I take tonight as a blip or do I tell him what happened? I'm back on my meds have been for over a week. Also I think I need a sedative for at night but I don't like asking for things it's part of my anxieties. Sleep would be good but I've had sleeping tablets before and they don't like giving them out too quickly apparently

Any help would be great thanks

[Pookyl]

I’m sorry you’re having such a hard time. I would tell your pdoc about everything - hurting yourself, your parents, stopping your meds.
You’ve been back on your meds for a week but that isn’t enough to bring blood levels back to therapeutic so you may need something like a prn to tide you over.
PRN Quetipine 25mg is sedating at that dose. I take a low dose at 8pm every night to help me sleep. Given that you’re already on it, is there anything to stop you taking that as a sedative?

[99fairies]

I've been praying for you and your mom ever since you told us about your mom. Hope she improves in the near future.

[Victoria'smom]

I would tell your pdoc everything.

[SorryShaped]

Tell them it all. Lay it out and show them what you're dealing with and what it's doing to you and your life in all aspects. You probably haven't been back on meds long enough for them to be working properly. There are a lot of sedating meds that can be used. Sleep is necessary for proper functioning of every aspect, including emotional

[Miss Laura]

Thanks guys, I was in 10 mins again. Told him everything. He says he's going to get my nurse to see me 2-3 weeks but don't think it's going to happen as he's leaving in March. He's really busy until then. He's referring me back to Psychology but the waiting list is long. I don't think this is going to happen either as I screwed up last time with psychology by coming off my meds. I saw psychology for 8 months if that as it wasnt every week I saw them. He says to keep taking my meds as I need them. I just at the moment am struggling to take them. I'm to go back in 6 months but if I need to see him my nurse will set up an appointment. He says I'm crashing cause of my outburst last night. I don't want to crash even more so take the meds.