[~Christina]

I saw the same T for 6 years. He retired so I had to find a new one.

Anyways “ Brian” who I have now seen twice. I’m not sure he has a personality?!?!?!?!

First session I kinda did a word vomit and just dumped out a brief summary of me and why I need ptsd work now as in very soon. He didn’t really explain to me his particular T ways , like common sense stuff as in HIS boundaries for T with him. Something that typically always is discussed first visit. But anyway.

Yesterday right off the bat I apologized for my word vomit and that I would like to understand his boundaries and what types of ptsd work he does/ offer. He basically deflected my questions. Hu? Oooookay.

He asked some random basic questions. Do I have support from my husband ? Yes .. Does your PCP offer support? Yes. Why have you needed IP in the past ? Suicidal stuff and Chronic Pain is always a part of that.. he had no working knowledge ( I understand that most people are clueless) of Fibro so I gave him a quick summary.

Blah blah a few more questions.

I must add that I am seeing him at a difference office than my old T .... but he has access to all my history , my old T made a full of facts summary of our 6 years together. ( He gave me a copy and it is one and a half pages with lots of paragraphs to make it a easy read) before I left the state. So this guy should not be totally clueless. I do get he wants to hear some if it from me.

But I was blunt first ( I’m always blunt) visit I need help on how to get past my PTSD.

Anyway I’m willing to give him 3 months to either help me process the event or not.

I got home and gave my husband a quick rundown. His opinion is that I probably scare the guy since I am so use to goal oriented T , I don’t know how else to do therapy, I don’t want to just chitchat. Maybe he’s not use to having someone so blunt? Someone that actually wants to deal with an actual problem , this is a mental county health office. So they get a good portion of people being judge ordered T and I’m thinking many don’t actual what to help themselves.

Anyway ...... I know that there will never be another “ Richard “ but maybe I just expect to much ?

Anyway 29 weeks and it’s still like it happened yesterday and nightmares every single night. I also turn a corner in the house and for a second I swear I see her standing in the kitchen or living room etc... it makes me shake with rage.

I’m really very angry at myself that I can’t find a way to get passed this myself.

Sorry for the word vomit

It sounds like you're trying to hard for him to like you. Sure, doctors can be friendly, but make no mistake, he is not you real friend. He has a job to do, and being a little detached isn't that bad when your main interests are probably ... we'll I don't know you well enough ..

Sorry, I don't think I understood that.

[wildflowerchild25]

I think you’re right that he might not be used to having people in his office that actually want clear help with a clear goal. Aaaand I also think you know he won’t be as good as your old T no matter what but I hope you’re willing to give him an actual fair chance. I’m not sure how to explain what I’m saying...maybe that you’re automatically a little “biased” against him bc he’s not your old t? Like you might look for things that are wrong with him? Not saying you absolutely will but I feel like that’s what I would do if I had to find a new t at this point bc I love mine so much. Just try to keep an open mind. Although it is ridiculous that he seemed to be clueless about your case, sounds like laziness to me.

As for the trauma, we have told you before that it’s ok to need help. I understand how hard it is, being a fierce independent woman myself. But you experienced a serious serious trauma. Not just a little thing. So, I really hope this guy can help you.

I’m sorry if this makes no sense:-/

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by 2ISAB

It sounds like you're trying to hard for him to like you. Sure, doctors can be friendly, but make no mistake, he is not you real friend. He has a job to do, and being a little detached isn't that bad when your main interests are probably ... we'll I don't know you well enough ..

Oh I don’t look to him as a friend, I would honestly have no respect if he was a more “ let’s be friends” kinda T

I do thank you for pointing that possibility put as I don’t think I made that clear.

*hugs*

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

I think you’re right that he might not be used to having people in his office that actually want clear help with a clear goal. Aaaand I also think you know he won’t be as good as your old T no matter what but I hope you’re willing to give him an actual fair chance. I’m not sure how to explain what I’m saying...maybe that you’re automatically a little “biased” against him bc he’s not your old t? Like you might look for things that are wrong with him? Not saying you absolutely will but I feel like that’s what I would do if I had to find a new t at this point bc I love mine so much. Just try to keep an open mind. Although it is ridiculous that he seemed to be clueless about your case, sounds like laziness to me.


As for the trauma, we have told you before that it’s ok to need help. I understand how hard it is, being a fierce independent woman myself. But you experienced a serious serious trauma. Not just a little thing. So, I really hope this guy can help you.


I’m sorry if this makes no sense:-/

Yes I do have to actively remind myself that he is not my old T. In fact I told him that upfront that I will struggle at times with that. I don’t know how to do T with someone else . Lol at my being blunt. But I’m more than willing to give it my best.

I will give him 3 months. I think that is plenty of time to see if we can eventually click.

Yes my ptsd is very complex, maybe he is trying to see how he can help me best or wondering if he actually can.

He is the only T in my town ( others than “ her’s “ that take Medicare. Yup small small town. If he doesn’t work out I’ll have to drive an hour north to have any other options, hope that doesn’t happen.

Wild you “ always” make sense

[Wild Coyote]

I think it' possible he does not yet know how to handle a highly motivated, goal-oriented blunt client. As you've pointed out, he likely deals with a very different population.

I feel professionals should know some about fibromyalgia in 2018. This is a prevalent condition. It has been in various types of headlines since the 1980's as fibromyalgia ( and before that as "fibrositis.") It would not take much to gain an understanding before a second appt, as there is now so much info readily available. I also feel he should have a better overall understanding of you if he has read Richard's summary. Yes, he may have wanted to hear from you.

Is he a "trauma therapist?" I hope so.

I feel a 3 month trial is very generous on your part.

I'll admit this is a touchy topic for me, as my long-term pdoc (he is also my therapist) is retiring in May and I cannot see anyone truly measuring up to him.

I hope this therapist comes through for you! You deserve a good break, as in ease from here on out!


WC

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Oh I don’t look to him as a friend, I would honestly have no respect if he was a more “ let’s be friends” kinda T

I do thank you for pointing that possibility put as I don’t think I made that clear.

*hugs*

Like I said, I didn't put much consideration towards you and your state of mind, making what I said 'rude' if I don't say so my self. You deserve better. This is no doubt troubling you and possibly affecting the people around you which is why (and correct me if I'm wrong) the typical self loathing that follows by any misunderstandings that have arisen from the past experiences when dealing with what you're going through. So yeah, I'm sorry but I'm trying my best to not piss people off. This site is perfect for learning how to break life long habits that bring more agony than joy. So in all seriousness I wish you nothing but the best.

Steve

[newtothis31]

How did you find and pick this particular therapist? Was he a recommendation from your old one? If he was, then I think it's fair to give three months. What are your other options for finding therapy?

As someone who has invested several years in therapy, it really took me a good 5+ years of seeking counseling services until I found someone who understood where I was trying to go. What separated her is that she really demonstrated a strong understanding of bipolar disorder. In my experience, many therapists do not want to hold you accountable.

Sometimes it's possible to know right away that it won't work out. I would be careful about seeking therapy from someone who is just now learning about fibro- it may not be possible for them to have the proper knowledge base to give you therapy. I am not sure if your regular fibro practitioner has any therapists, but I would ask for a referral and then compare to your current experience.

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by 2ISAB

Like I said, I didn't put much consideration towards you and your state of mind, making what I said 'rude' if I don't say so my self. You deserve better. This is no doubt troubling you and possibly affecting the people around you which is why (and correct me if I'm wrong) the typical self loathing that follows by any misunderstandings that have arisen from the past experiences when dealing with what you're going through. So yeah, I'm sorry but I'm trying my best to not piss people off. This site is perfect for learning how to break life long habits that bring more agony than joy. So in all seriousness I wish you nothing but the best.

Steve

You were not rude all !!!

Don’t worry about pissing people off. PC is all about opinions and it’s fine to disagree with anyone. Often something you might say allows us all to look at things from a didn’t angle, perspective.

I really appreciated your post.

Thank you so much Steve

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

I think it' possible he does not yet know how to handle a highly motivated, goal-oriented blunt client. As you've pointed out, he likely deals with a very different population.


I feel professionals should know some about fibromyalgia in 2018. This is a prevalent condition. It has been in various types of headlines since the 1980's as fibromyalgia ( and before that as "fibrositis.") It would not take much to gain an understanding before a second appt, as there is now so much info readily available. I also feel he should have a better overall understanding of you if he has read Richard's summary. Yes, he may have wanted to hear from you.


Is he a "trauma therapist?" I hope so.


I feel a 3 month trial is very generous on your part.


I'll admit this is a touchy topic for me, as my long-term pdoc (he is also my therapist) is retiring in May and I cannot see anyone truly measuring up to him.


I hope this therapist comes through for you! You deserve a good break, as in ease from here on out!




WC

My T retired at the end of the year while I was still living in Florida.

I do think my “ style “ is indeed a bit of a shock to him. I understand he needs to ask me X questions. As that is his “ style” of his way of providing help for my Trauma. That is indeed a question I need to ask him. Why waste time for both of us if he just isn’t into violent ptsd work, that is a valid question he should be able to give me a honest answer.

This is same company as my old T worked for .... there is not another T in either office that accepts Medicare. They pay providers horribly low so I understand such a lack of those that do take it but it sucks for people like me.

I have called all local offices. There are 2 and neither are accepting new clients and there is a lengthily list for openings.

I do have an option of driving north for an hour to find someone else, I will do that if I get no where with this guy.

Yes even a basic knowledge of Fibro should be known. A quick google search has a simple fibro causes Pain for XYZ reasons.

Thank you WC for your once again wonderful response

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by newtothis31

How did you find and pick this particular therapist? Was he a recommendation from your old one? If he was, then I think it's fair to give three months. What are your other options for finding therapy?


As someone who has invested several years in therapy, it really took me a good 5+ years of seeking counseling services until I found someone who understood where I was trying to go. What separated her is that she really demonstrated a strong understanding of bipolar disorder. In my experience, many therapists do not want to hold you accountable.


Sometimes it's possible to know right away that it won't work out. I would be careful about seeking therapy from someone who is just now learning about fibro- it may not be possible for them to have the proper knowledge base to give you therapy. I am not sure if your regular fibro practitioner has any therapists, but I would ask for a referral and then compare to your current experience.

Thank you for your response, I got long winded replying to WC but it addresses a lot of the wonderful questions and my circumstances you brought to attention.

I don’t have a problem with doing hard Therapy work. As my husband said I probably scared him a bit lol

It is sad that there is such a shortage of providers in general that work in the mental health field. So many people have no access ( I am lucky) or people fall through the cracks.. very sad.

[HALLIEBETH87]

I'm thankful my psyd takes Medicare. I'm so lucky and grateful. I hope brien turns out ok. I'll be praying he can help you the way you need helped and of
Course I am here for
You!
I'm just a fb msg away!

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by HALLIEBETH87

I'm thankful my psyd takes Medicare. I'm so lucky and grateful. I hope brien turns out ok. I'll be praying he can help you the way you need helped and of

Course I am here for

You!

I'm just a fb msg away!

Thanks ! I’m here for you too