[leomama]

When I had ptsd to the point of disability I needed the med but now that I can work I am trying to go med free.
I’ve not read much about that in the bp community, I’ve read more about that in the ptsd community and I question some of it.
My p doc did not lie to me, he said it would not be easy but he supported my decision if I replace the med with all that I’ve learned in CBT, DBT, and psychodynamic therapy.
I’m waiting to get my new work schedule and to go to the lab before my making my next appointment with him where I will confront him about his bp dx of me.
He’s thought that about me from the beginning.

[still_crazy]

med-free is an option for some people. Even a lot of people labeled with 'schizophrenia' end up off psych drugs and functioning remarkably well, all things considered.

where I'm at right now...there's pressure to stay medicated. Could be worse. I haven't been in a mental hospital in over 10 years, and my treatment status is "voluntary outpatient," so I"ve been spared the injections and such they put some people on, and yet...

not only do I support your decision to make a go of life w/o psych drugs, I'm kind of hoping to get there myself, one day.

[leomama]

Originally Posted by still_crazy

med-free is an option for some people. Even a lot of people labeled with 'schizophrenia' end up off psych drugs and functioning remarkably well, all things considered.

where I'm at right now...there's pressure to stay medicated. Could be worse. I haven't been in a mental hospital in over 10 years, and my treatment status is "voluntary outpatient," so I"ve been spared the injections and such they put some people on, and yet...

not only do I support your decision to make a go of life w/o psych drugs, I'm kind of hoping to get there myself, one day.

I have never been in a mental hospital.
I asked my p doc if this was kind of like the guy in a beautiful mind going med free and he said no it wasn't.

I'm still mad at him, especially since the only insurance plan he was in was expensive so I switched to a lower insurance plan and I paid full price out of pocket to see him. That leaves another thing to do, call my insurance and found out how seeing him can go to my deductible.

For me I want to go off medication to see if it will help me better deal with the pressures at work.I want to actually feel my feelings. I also just got out of a bad relationship and again I want to see if actually being able to feel my feelings will keep away from bad men.

Before I made the decision to go on a psych drug I was symptomatic of complex ptsd and it took me a full 10 years to recover.

[still_crazy]

yeah...psych drugs are....kinda complicated. im glad that i only take 2, neither at high doses (abilify, lamictal). Plus, I do the Orthomolecular vitamin routine on top, and that does seem to help.

and yet..where's the line between "controlling symptoms" and controlling the person/"patient" ? between making "mental illness more managable," and making the person/patient "more manageable" ?

I sense a lot of power dynamics in psychiatric treatment. ugh. I've had my fair share of misadventures in psychiatry and psychology, and now...I'm eager for the day I can taper off and just say "ENOUGH!"

OK. anyway, if you're into alternative/complementary stuff, here's a link to free information about the vitamin thing I do.

DoctorYourself.com: Andrew Saul's Natural Health Website

[leomama]

Originally Posted by still_crazy

yeah...psych drugs are....kinda complicated. im glad that i only take 2, neither at high doses (abilify, lamictal). Plus, I do the Orthomolecular vitamin routine on top, and that does seem to help.

and yet..where's the line between "controlling symptoms" and controlling the person/"patient" ? between making "mental illness more managable," and making the person/patient "more manageable" ?

I sense a lot of power dynamics in psychiatric treatment. ugh. I've had my fair share of misadventures in psychiatry and psychology, and now...I'm eager for the day I can taper off and just say "ENOUGH!"

OK. anyway, if you're into alternative/complementary stuff, here's a link to free information about the vitamin thing I do.

DoctorYourself.com: Andrew Saul's Natural Health Website

Yeah Ive been doing supplements since my dx, my p doc recommended b complex, reservatrol, coq10 and fish oil to go along with my medication. I've been doing lamictal for over 10 years, I was prescribed seroquel to help with sleep but its always been too strong for me.

I wouldn't say the lamictal is causing side effects that I know of but I don't want to be dependent on a prescription and something that I have to get lab tests to check and make sure my body is processing. I don't have anything against prescription med, I just don't want to depend on something outside my body.

It really boils down to needing to have regular lab work when on prescription medication. I'm over 40 now and I really want to have as clean as system as possible, no drugs, no alcohol, trying to clean up my diet (paleo, definitely no sugar and no wheat and very little dairy and legumes and other grains).

There's no power dynamics with my p doc, he's always been on my side, but at work? Holy moly, the power dynamics are insane. That's what motivated me to go med free, I want to become mentally and emotionally stronger. I don't want to depend on the crutch of medication.

[raspberrytorte]

I've been throwing my haldol in the toilet. Does that count as med free?

[leomama]

Originally Posted by raspberrytorte

I've been throwing my haldol in the toilet. Does that count as med free?

Is it with your p doc's approval?

[Zigy]

Not me. I tried in the past and I always ended up worse.

[Guiness187055]

Originally Posted by Zigy

Not me. I tried in the past and I always ended up worse.

Me too I start to self medicate and that never ends well usually in a psychotic manic episode.

Are you bipolar and know much about it?

Bipolar is notorious for going off meds and relapsing. Bipolar isn’t curable with therapy, although it helps and maybe someone with a mild case could get by with therapy. I did for a long time before diagnosed a second time.

The thing is, bipolar can involve a lot of SI and there is a real risk (statistics are sobering). I would pick a different forum for this discussion.

Going off medications would equal my death. It was for my 24 year old nephew.

[leomama]

Originally Posted by BirdDancer

Going off medications would equal my death. It was for my 24 year old nephew.

That might be true for me if I were on multiple medications or had only one dx. This just proves my cynicism at my bp dx but I’m not a dr so that’s the way it goes. Oh did I forget to mention I’m doing this under a dr’s supervision? I don’t think I did but in case of my dear readers missed that part.

[leomama]

Originally Posted by key tones

Are you bipolar and know much about it?


Bipolar is notorious for going off meds and relapsing. Bipolar isn’t curable with therapy, although it helps and maybe someone with a mild case could get by with therapy. I did for a long time before diagnosed a second time.


The thing is, bipolar can involve a lot of SI and there is a real risk (statistics are sobering). I would pick a different forum for this discussion.

Allow me to respond now that you’ve apologized.
As you know I am not a “visitor from the ptsd forum” but in fact am and have been dual dx. I wasn’t expecting this much resistance in the bp community. Where did I not say I wasn’t under a dr’s permission or without a dr’s consent?
A little bit of support or encouragement would be nice. Y’all aren’t making this any easier for me. I have a hard enough time accepting my bp dx as it is. Not getting support for my decisions with my dr from the bp community isn’t exactly helping, you know what I’m saying?

Perhaps I should edit the topic but I can’t, so, if y’all could just read and reread the part about under a dr’s supervision and with a dr’s permission I’d be much obliged. Thx.

[251turnaround]

I'd love to quit taking meds, but unfortunately doing so means mania or depression shortly afterwards for me.

[leomama]

Originally Posted by 251turnaround

I'd love to quit taking meds, but unfortunately doing so means mania or depression shortly afterwards for me.

I don’t know if I can do it but I was given permission to try

[Nola0250]

I think a lot of the pushback you are seeing is not that people don't want to support you doing whats right for you but rather this:

It's taken a lot of us a very long time and work through a lot of denial to accept the diagnosis and the fact that we're going to be on meds for life. Maybe that's not everybody (and maybe not you) but I think for the majority of people with BP, it's the reality.

I know I lived years in denial of my diagnosis. I kinda knew it was there but thought I could handle it. I could, for the most part, "pass" and manage my symptoms so others couldn't see them, but my quality of life was miserable and I made many bad decisions that I otherwise would have avoided (like a 13 year marriage to a man who verbally, emotionally and financially abused me while I worked like a dog to support us and he drank). I think if I was not chronically and severely depressed I would not have stayed. I finally reached an episode that I could not hide and I was afraid I was going to die. I realized that I needed help and although I'm still struggling, my life is better already and I would never want to go back there.

Anyway, my experience is different than yours. All our experiences are different. But I feel mentally and physically stronger on my meds and don't see them as a crutch. That's not a judgement of you, that's just how I feel about me.

[leomama]

Originally Posted by Nola0250

I think a lot of the pushback you are seeing is not that people don't want to support you doing whats right for you but rather this:


It's taken a lot of us a very long time and work through a lot of denial to accept the diagnosis and the fact that we're going to be on meds for life. Maybe that's not everybody (and maybe not you) but I think for the majority of people with BP, it's the reality.


I know I lived years in denial of my diagnosis. I kinda knew it was there but thought I could handle it. I could, for the most part, "pass" and manage my symptoms so others couldn't see them, but my quality of life was miserable and I made many bad decisions that I otherwise would have avoided (like a 13 year marriage to a man who verbally, emotionally and financially abused me while I worked like a dog to support us and he drank). I think if I was not chronically and severely depressed I would not have stayed. I finally reached an episode that I could not hide and I was afraid I was going to die. I realized that I needed help and although I'm still struggling, my life is better already and I would never want to go back there.


Anyway, my experience is different than yours. All our experiences are different. But I feel mentally and physically stronger on my meds and don't see them as a crutch. That's not a judgement of you, that's just how I feel about me.

Mmm hmm, k but I’ve been on “meds” for almost 12 years and I want to see if I can find the comfort in myself rather then a pill. I didn’t say I was going to be successful.
What I resent is ppl treating me like an ignorant uneducated inexperienced danger to the rest of you.

[Nola0250]

Originally Posted by leomama

Mmm hmm, k but I’ve been on “meds” for almost 12 years and I want to see if I can find the comfort in myself rather then a pill. I didn’t say I was going to be successful.
What I resent is ppl treating me like an ignorant uneducated inexperienced danger to the rest of you.

Maybe I was unclear. I don't think that about you. I was just saying maybe you feel rejected in your ideas because other people are afraid of going off meds. Maybe some of us can and some of us can't. I don't judge you for what you are doing. I just think maybe some others are triggered a bit by the very idea, and are reacting to that. It's probably not personal.

[LacunaCoiler]

I know the person I was before being diagnosed (and given meds) and the wife didn't like that person. She's told me that everything is cool and she'd stick by me as long as I was on my meds. As soon as I get off the meds and things crash and burn (when they do because they always seem to when i take myself off my meds without anyone knowing.) she said she didn't know if she could be with me. So that's a huge intensive to stay on my meds because I love my wife with all my heart.

Med free is the dream for me as well. However, it's not reachable so I try to be on as little meds as possible. So I feel your need and want to be med free. I wish my doc would see that and work with me to get off them. Though I know from experience that it's for the best if I stay on them.

I know going med free isn't for everyone, and it looks like many people feel that it's impossible in their current situation (to each their own, right?), so I wish you the best of luck in your journey to be be med free.

[Row Jimmy]

I am med three - celexa, lithium, and Lipitor.

[~Christina]

BP I here , never doubted my diagnosis.

I was med free for about 18 or so months a couple years ago with my Pdocs blessing. For me the worst part was my brain learning to function again without the meds I would say 3-4 months and I was finally back to brain function clearly with out meds.

There were some highs and lows and often I was white knuckled holding on.

I do not regret it but a few cans of worms popped open in therapy that were to much for me to handle med free at that time.

I doubt I’ll stay on meds forever, maybe I will go off meds every so many years ? Or maybe at some point I will just stay on them. Dunno

Everyone is different and manages there BP or whatever “ label” we are handed.

No one is right or wrong.

[leomama]

K I’m out, enjoy the thread. If you want to support my efforts come to my bp 2 post.

[Sophia-Marie]

Hmm... Idk... I was on meds for some time regular but I quit that over one year ago.

I still take meds but just as a 'need medication' (is there a better word in english for meds u just take occasionally?), even though some of this meds are meant to be taken daily...

My docs or ok with that as long as it helps me and has no bad side effects.

Would u count this as 'med free'?

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by leomama

K I’m out, enjoy the thread. If you want to support my efforts come to my bp 2 post.

What has you upset ? Was it my thread ? Talking about my experience?

[leomama]

It’s not you Christina it’s people who are telling me I’m ignorant, unsafe, uneducated, I don’t want to hear that, it’s unwarranted and untrue criticism.
I don’t like the term med and dilute the term meds even more.