[RainyDay107]

Doing horribly, severe mixed episode with lots of anger and extreme suicidal ideations and just short of plans. However, I am SAFE. This is just me checking in.

Saw pdoc on Good Friday. Going through med change, he knows my status. My partner went with me, as always. He’s with me 24/7. Go see T tomorrow and every week. Go back to pdoc before the end of month to see if the med helps. He will return my call same day and get me in earlier, if needed.

I feel like I am in HELL. I would get myself to the ER and get myself admitted IP, no question, if I didn’t have the support of my partner...and I hate that I have been so angry. It’s not my nature.

I did tell him if he’s over it, then just take me to the hospital.

I’m going to get through this %@$&#. This too, Shall Pass.

I’d send hugs to those who need them but I might bite you. Just kidding, lol. I have to laugh at myself sometimes.

[Wild Coyote]

(((((( glamslam ))))))

Love and Prayers,
WC

2 Weeks + 5 Days

I couldn't face more shopping at the mall today so i stayed home and had a nice, quiet, calm day doing laundry, going for a walk, reading and writing on a weight-loss forum, watching soaps and part of a movie. I ate well. My hunger has eased tremendously and i feel a lot more confident about my diet. My cals have started to come down too.

I got the dreaded request-for-update forms from my disability insurance company. It's especially scary this year because i have a young doctor who is new to me since my old one retired. I hope he will support me! He's seen me hypomanic and depressed so he knows the scope of my illness. Sure hope he doesn't fuss!

Hugs,

Jane.

[bizi]

hi jane!
drinking up a storm....
wheeee!
bizi

[Cocosurviving]

I paid my rent today. Then it took forever to get through to the allergy clinic I was referred to. I had been waiting over a week just for the referral to be processed. I am covered in hives and have been for days. It’s day three and the Oklahoma teachers are still on strike. I support the teachers. As a former social worker I completely understand how teachers feel. Overworked, underpaid and lack of funding.

[Tucson]

I just came back from walking as quickly as I can for two miles, and then walking normally going back. I am dog tired! I will have no problems falling asleep tonight.

Originally Posted by Cocosurviving

I paid my rent today. Then it took forever to get through to the allergy clinic I was referred to. I had been waiting over a week just for the referral to be processed. I am covered in hives and have been for days. It’s day three and the Oklahoma teachers are still on strike. I support the teachers. As a former social worker I completely understand how teachers feel. Overworked, underpaid and lack of funding.

A combination of Zertec and Zantac is pretty good for knocking out a bad case of hives. Zantac is a H2 antihistamine (as well as antacid)

You can’t take these before allergy testing though.

My old boss and I both have different types of autoimmune hives, which is how I learned about this.

[RainyDay107]

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

(((((( glamslam ))))))

Love and Prayers,
WC

Thank you so much. I hope you are well, I need to catch up here. I just am struggling...

[wildflowerchild25]

It’s totally miserable out which is making me miserable on my birthday. I’m tired of it being so cold and rainy every damn day. And now they’re calling for more ****ing snow on Saturday!!! I need it to be warm already. Hypomania is gone and I feel like depression will only get worse the worse the weather is.

I’m supposed to go to dinner with my SIL tonight to celebrate my birthday but I don’t feel like going. But I should go, because moping about is worse. But the wind is supposed to be really high. I’m worried the broken tree branch will finally fall and knock out power. My brother was supposed to take care of it but never did. It’s too late now. If it doesn’t fall today with the 60mph wind gusts I will be shocked. No pun intended.

Sigh...depression is only mild at this point so I’m hoping it stays that way. Hypomania only was mild so maybe depression will be the same.

[giddykitty]

Anyone have outlandish thoughts with Bipolar like say leaving your husband some days, then on other days you feel crazy for even thinking that because you love him so much?? Or is this a symptom of something else?

[Guiness187055]

Originally Posted by giddykitty

Anyone have outlandish thoughts with Bipolar like say leaving your husband some days, then on other days you feel crazy for even thinking that because you love him so much?? Or is this a symptom of something else?

Nope that's bipolar in a nutshell.

GiddyKitty, that sounds more borderline to me. The fancy term is 'idealization and devaluation' for what it's worth. Hugs, Jane.

[Blueberrybook]

I did some grocery shopping, not the best idea with hypomania and spent too much money. I went to see the pdoc today, and he is tinkering with my prescriptions.

[Nammu]

I agree with whatever. BP is mood related.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by glamslam

Thank you so much. I hope you are well, I need to catch up here. I just am struggling...

I am very sorry you are struggling.
Just take good care and catch-up whenever.
Love and Prayers,
WC

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by giddykitty

Anyone have outlandish thoughts with Bipolar like say leaving your husband some days, then on other days you feel crazy for even thinking that because you love him so much?? Or is this a symptom of something else?

I agree with Jane and Nammu; this sounds more like borderline than bipolar.
For what it's worth,


WC

[Tucson]

I have to shop for groceries today. I will also walk four miles. I have my new phone from AT&T. I am eager to get it set up. My depression has improved since I began exersizing. But it is still there. I have not been keeping the place clean and my clothes washed. Today I will try to change this.

[Unrigged64072835]

Originally Posted by giddykitty

Anyone have outlandish thoughts with Bipolar like say leaving your husband some days, then on other days you feel crazy for even thinking that because you love him so much?? Or is this a symptom of something else?

Yeah I do, but I have BPD and my mind gets bored with stability sometimes.

[Wander]

Possible Trigger Warning ...


Been doing really bad this last week: hypomania then, agitated depression and I highly emphasise the agitation. Like climbing off the walls and taking people’s head off for no reason. It has been so unbearable I have wanted to die and almost been sectioned against my wil(involuntary) twice. Both these times were due to suicide intent with a plan. my doctor is running out of no weight gain options so I stared 50mg of Seroquel last night. I’m awake a 3 an but not agitated so that’s a plus. So fed up with being in hospital. It’s been over two weeks nor because of the danger I’m in due to severe agitation. Hopefully the Seroquel will be a temporary measure and I will go back to where I was before this episode started. This has been hell to say the least.

Oh, I am on suicide watch and can't go for a swim in the ocean which would ironically help me get off suicide watch. Sigh ...

[Unrigged64072835]

Hugs for those who want them. Double for those who are having a hard time.

I'm working through some anger that I wouldn't have had if I wasn't overhearing another table at breakfast. It was hard to ignore them. I ended up writing a few poems that were somewhat political. Not good for my psyche.

Also did a round of errands. It was like every store had only one or two things. I'm also looking for a new shampoo/conditioner that won't irritate my skin. What was recommended for me also has stuff that I don't want, which is making shopping rather annoying. I think I have some ideas and I may buy them online.

Making ham and egg fried rice for dinner. This ought to be fun. Kids are with their friends. I have a feeling my daughter and her boyfriend are on the way out. He's still acting immaturely and she's hanging out with other friends instead of being with him. It will be interesting as they both own my husband's old car.

So mood is rather grumpy, but getting better.

[ShikyoNoTenshi]

I have work later tonight but I can't fall back to sleep. Only got 3.5hrs of sleep and I've been up since 3pm. I feel wired and my thoughts are racing to the point I'm loosing my train of thought. I think the bupropion is "activating" me into a hypomanic state.

Had an ok day.

When I was driving home from work today, I put on Waze to route me around traffic. The Waze app kept mumbling creepy stuff to me, so I had to close the app. It was saying stuff like, "don't you think I know what you're up to?" and "you don't deserve to drive without me." It was addressing me by my name.

Going to attempt to read a book now. I'll probably fail, but oh well. Have to give it an honest shot instead of saying I can't do it.

I also get to meet my new GP tomorrow, so I'm preparing to see a frightened look on her face, as if she's come face to face with a serial killer. Because people with BP are serial killers, right?

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Wander

Possible Trigger Warning ...


Been doing really bad this last week: hypomania then, agitated depression and I highly emphasise the agitation. Like climbing off the walls and taking people’s head off for no reason. It has been so unbearable I have wanted to die and almost been sectioned against my wil(involuntary) twice. Both these times were due to suicide intent with a plan. my doctor is running out of no weight gain options so I stared 50mg of Seroquel last night. I’m awake a 3 an but not agitated so that’s a plus. So fed up with being in hospital. It’s been over two weeks nor because of the danger I’m in due to severe agitation. Hopefully the Seroquel will be a temporary measure and I will go back to where I was before this episode started. This has been hell to say the least.

Oh, I am on suicide watch and can't go for a swim in the ocean which would ironically help me get off suicide watch. Sigh ...

I hope things stabilize for you soon.

WC

[Wild Coyote]

I am very tired.


WC

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

I am very tired.


WC

I'm sorry you're so tired. I know you did a lot for easter. I hope you get some good rest.