[yellow_fleurs]

How is your level of insight in certain episodes (seems unlikely with mania)? I was possibly just hypomanic and was half aware with one side of my brain, and half clueless with the other. Total fighting and needing to check in with the impulsive side to make sure I didn't get myself killed or do anything I seriously regretted. It is definitely a strange thing to look back on. Did anything help you develop insight? Does having insight help you from acting on certain reckless/impulsive decisions? Thanks!

[pirilin]

I don't have a clue. But you have a reply. Meaning I bumped your thread. Good luck.
Cheers.

[yellow_fleurs]

Originally Posted by pirilin

I don't have a clue. But you have a reply. Meaning I bumped your thread. Good luck.
Cheers.

Thanks

[Miss Laura]

I'm unsure.... I mean I guess we all have insight even if it's just slightly if we have had bipolar for years and are in therapy. I guess for me I like the hypomania so don't really bother about symptoms and looking out for it. But can sometimes "catch" the symptoms of mania if I'm being honest I chose 9/10 times not to listen to my inner sensible thoughts though. I'm quite ignorant when it comes to my symptoms cause I believe I'm misdiagnosed and don't have Bipolar. I will blatantly lie to your face even if I have sever symptoms like delusions, hallucinations and paranoia.

[~Christina]

I have a good insight of myself in a episode. Of course there comes a point eventually for me I get a last “ okay it’s time you get to a safe place, now”

I know numerous people that really have no self awareness once a mood shift begins.

[wiretwister]

it has always seemed to me that if I am in an episode my perception would be off ... of course for me my perception is probably off most of the time ... the main reason I ask ( and believe ) what my wife sees ... I think just taking the meds affects my perception of the world and myself ... JMO ...

[MoodyMountain]

In a bad manic episode, there is a little bit of me that knows what's going on but has zero conscious control of what's happening, the grandiose delusions and my emotions pretty much have control. I have the best insight over hypo-manias, although my mouth can still get me in trouble. Usually I can ride them out as they are short. Depression I apparently have denial about, according to my therapist. I have a really hard time putting together enough depression symptoms to realize I'm depressed, unless I feel sadness (rare) or get so demotivated that I've done nothing for days. It has to get bad before I recognize depression for what it is.

[Pookyl]

According to my doctors I have great insight. Right up until I don’t. Insight is also pointless if you’re unwilling to act on it.
I always have a short window of time that I can take a prn etc.

[yellow_fleurs]

Originally Posted by wiretwister

it has always seemed to me that if I am in an episode my perception would be off ... of course for me my perception is probably off most of the time ... the main reason I ask ( and believe ) what my wife sees ... I think just taking the meds affects my perception of the world and myself ... JMO ...

Yeah I feel that way. Like a part of my brain still has some insight and is stopping me from doing anything too dangerous, but I am still thinking it is not a big deal at the same time, or whatever. Just weird perception of the issues.

[Gabyunbound]

When I first started this journey, some 12 years ago (it started much earlier but that's when I was diagnosed) I had 0 insight. Over the years I think I've acquired quite a bit, and I credit this largely to a pdoc I had some 6 years ago who explained a lot to me; he was big into education and an all-around lovely pdoc.

I think it has helped me be less impulsive, because I'm more aware of my moods. I know when I'm going into an episode, tell my pdoc and change meds accordingly.

That said, said insight did not stop me from impulsively moving from Boston to California 4 years ago: my pdoc asked me again and again: are you sure you've planned this out? (yes, but no). Do you really have a job over there (yes, but no). Etc. I wanted to go so so bad, I just lied. I was lying to him, but also to myself. I had a place to live, one that didn't suit me (full of retirees) and that was it. After I calmed down, after the storm, It took me some time in CA to realize what I had done. I think I was too ashamed to admit it to myself, especially since CA didn't work out (amongst other things, the job I thankfully got quickly, was 2.5 hours away from where I was living). Damn I felt ashamed. Shame can be so toxic. It took a very good friend I made to get me back to the East Coast and this time to a state where I had some family, where I'd have a support system.

So, to answer your question: yes and no. Insight has helped me sometimes, but not all the time. I think it helps me with hypomania and depression, but not with mania.

[yellow_fleurs]

Thanks for the reply. This is my goal, to build up some insight into what is going on. I have some insight into certain things like my moods related to my menstrual cycle, and my typical depression symptoms. Other times I struggle with insight. Like I had little idea what was going on while in a mixed episode. It makes sense to me that insight would be lacking in mania, and that sounds tough to have to deal with those decisions after the fact. That's great you have developed some insight over the years, though. I don't think I have ever been manic, or lost 100% insight, but have been a danger to myself at times so not sure where the line is.