[Lightning2127]

I’ve been feeling so isolated and alone recently. I’m realizing more and more that nobody really cares about me. I live alone, and I am currently not working. I don’t get along well with my family, and I literally have no friends near me. Sometimes I can go three or four days without seeing or talking to a single person and that drives me half crazy. I recently started drinking heavily again because of this, and I’m afraid that it will get out of hand again. I feel stuck because I really want to get out of this area, but I don’t know how to do that. I’m from a really conservative small town, and I don’t really fit in here at all. I’m only here because of my family. I don’t have the financial resources to leave because I’m really bad at holding a job. I really need advice. I don’t know what to do anymore. Can anyone else relate at all?

[cashart10]

I just want to let you know that I’m thinking of you and send you hugs. Your input and voice are wanted here. Much love!

[wildflowerchild25]

Can you go to a cafe or something for lunch every couple of days? It might be tough not working but maybe if you get out and just order a tea or something, at least you’re with people. Even if you’re not talking to them, at least you’ll have contact with the outside world. What about support groups like AA or nami or DBSA? That’s a good way to meet people if you’re anxiety isn’t too much. I personally have trouble making myself go to support groups because of anxiety but once I am there I am fine.

I understand the wanting to leave but not being able to. Not exactly the same but I live with my mom and I really want to move out but haven’t been stable in a job for awhile, so I haven’t been able to. I just got a new job that I’m hoping won’t be too stressful for me and I’ll actually be able to save money to move out. I’m going to wait another year though to make sure I can keep the job.

[Travelinglady]

Hi, Lightning2127, and welcome to Psych Central! How about getting out and doing some free things? For example, join the library and see if they have events going on. Check out some books to read while you're at it. Maybe you could meet some people, too.

We are here for you, also. So, jump in where you'd like. Ask questions, post responses, make friends, join groups, play games, etc.

Again, welcome, dear one! Make yourself at home.

[Blueberrybook]

I am thinking of you too. This was exactly my case in college and graduate school. In college, I technically lived with my sister, but she spent 99% of her time at boyfriends' places and only came back to get new clothes or a forgotten textbook or something.

In grad school, I lived alone. If it was a holiday and I didn't go home, I'd see no one. In both college & grad school, if it wasn't for school, I would see no one except sometimes the only good friend I made in college (she unfortunately lives far away, in Connecticut now). I am married though I had to bite the bullet and do online dating to meet my husband; he came into the marriage knowing I had psych issues, and we have a 10 year old daughter (though challenging to parent as she has tons of sensory issues and puberty hormones as well).

Now, the only friends I really have are my 2 sisters. One lives in the Dallas area, which is anywhere from a 4-6 hour drive from the Houston area where I live, so I don't see her often. The other sister lives around a 45 minute drive away, so I see her more often, but she has 3 girls 7 and under, so her house is often chaotic. I am lucky to get along well with my sisters, but I do feel they are kind of built in friends as I never had to go out of my way to meet them.

I have lately forced myself into social situations (though this mainly happens when I am hypomanic), but I know it is good for me too. I have joined 2 book clubs since I love to read, one mixed men & women through the library and one women's group through the neighborhood. I really want to know the organizer of the neighborhood group better as before the book club was even organized, she & her husband went on the same bat hike in a local nature preserve as my daughter and I did, so we have more in common than just reading, but I don't know about taking the next step. I also recently found out that a woman from my graduating high school class (which was small, 109 students) works and lives near me. I sometimes ate lunch with a group including her, and I really think I'd like to go to coffee or a meal with her but am reluctant to take the next step. It is so, so hard for me to make friends. I have also resolved to be more involved in my daughter's PTO. Very few parents (mostly women) attend as I have gone to meetings in the beginning and then quit. The attendance is maybe around 15-20, including the principal, a teacher, and sometimes the counselor if an upcoming event has been organized by the school counselor.

I grew up in a small, conservative town too (everyone knew everyone or at least someone from everyone's family). Now the town is growing with the spreading sprawl from Houston, so it's bigger than when I lived there and converting from a lot of family farms to housing subdivisions and shopping centers.

I am sorry you are having so many problems

[Moose72]

I have a lunch group I get together with once a week. I started going to a book store out of boredome years ago. I began to talk to a man who also frequented there. We became friends. Graduallyhe introduced me to others there. One of those was part of a lunch group- a long time tradition of entertwined friendships and relations - daughters mothers fathers.... The group has since gotten smaller since the founding member died but we still go. I have a set of good friends that care for each other. Get out and about- join a club... Something like this could happen to you too.

[Movingon69]

I'm sorry you are going through this.

There's been some good suggestions here. The other one I would suggest is looking at Meetup groups to see if there is anything that interests you or maybe volunteer for a local non-profit.

Keep posting here. You will find the group open and caring