[luvyrself]

I have to be fair, my therapist has give me a few good concepts (like thinking of my big anxiety issues as fear balls as in "dealing with that fear ball", and she really knows me,but most of the time she just sits there. As a bipolar mixed, sometimes I do need to vent but she allows me to ruminate. I do try to make a prioritized outline of talking points. A couple times I have told therapists that I really want their active involvement, eg to direct the discussion. To me that means setting goals, keeping me on track, etc. Nonetheless, they seem to soon slip back into mostly just sitting there. I do talk a lot due to anxiety and hypomania, but still. I like a lot of structure and sometimes feel I am getting more help using workbooks and reading this forum. HOW MANY OF YOU HAVE A THERAPIST WHO DOES MORE THAN JUST SIT THERE? I don't think I should be doing all the work.
And don't even get me started on the 15 minute intervals the Pdocs use. How many of you ask for and get a longer session? Except for people that are having smooth sailing, I think 15 minutes is ridiculous even for a med check,for bipolar. I will be glad to get your input on this.

[Fuzzybear]

Personally I’ve found more helpful and active listeners outside of “psychotherapy”... I do know that some people have great therapists though. I guess I talk a lot in therapy too.. or would if I trusted the therapist at all I have also found they have a tendency not to .... hard to explain.

And yes 15 minutes from a pdoc. To me this is also ridiculous. That’s exactly the time given ...I did ask for a longer session and the pdoc refused... I simply stopped going as the pdoc didn’t take my feelings re meds into account much either..

“Talk less and give more drugs” - this doesn’t “work” well at all for me.

I’m glad your therapist has given you some good ideas re anxiety.. I hadn’t heard that idea re fear balls before.... and I’ve had a “lot of therapy” (and have a “lot of anxiety” )

[SorryShaped]

My therapist is very interactive. The ones that weren't aren't my therapist anymore for that reason. I've had those say and listened and thought I'd do better with a potted plant. I need someone who will wring me out, listen, offer suggestions, talk me down, make me cry, make me laugh...
I can't imagine my life without him at this point. He's too important to me.

[Fuzzybear]

^ I doubt if I’ll ever feel that way about a therapist....

Some therapists also dislike it if a “patient” becomes “attached” - as a former t I saw did. (Having encouraged said “attachment” )

I have only had 2 therapists. The first was just as you described: sat there, listened, offered little to nothing in the way of feedback. I went to her for 5 years or so, and it was pretty ineffective. I thought it must be my fault, which is why I kept going. I thought if I could only try harder then it would surely work.

The second therapist was a psychiatry resident who needed to do psychotherapy with a patient as part of his training. It was the most transformative year of my life. I’ve thought about this a lot, but I still don’t really know why it was so effective. What I can say is that he was engaged with me in a way the other therapist wasn’t. I felt like he actually cared about me — not just for that hour, but in a general life/human sense. He never gave any advice, but somehow I always ended up at the right answer myself. It was one of the most fortunate experiences I’ve had. Yet I still can’t explain why.

Proper therapy is powerful and transformative. Bad therapy is a waste of money and time.

[cashart10]

My t does lots and she is amazing. We have done EMDR and havening and she has helped me apply havening to my everyday anxieties. She also has helped teach me mindfulness and takes the time to work with me through issues. Now she is also both seeing my 10 year old daughter and helping me help my daughter.

My pdoc also is pretty amazing. I do pay her $150 but she does always give 30 minutes of her undivided attention. She takes an interest in not only my mental health but also the details of my life. I’m not sure if it’s that she takes really good notes, but she seems to remember everything! She also will have lengthy phone conversations with me at the end of her work day if I am in crisis or if I need a med adjustment in between appts which saves me a lot of $!

[luvyrself]

Originally Posted by cashart10

My t does lots and she is amazing. We have done EMDR and havening and she has helped me apply havening to my everyday anxieties. She also has helped teach me mindfulness and takes the time to work with me through issues. Now she is also both seeing my 10 year old daughter and helping me help my daughter.

My pdoc also is pretty amazing. I do pay her $150 but she does always give 30 minutes of her undivided attention. She takes an interest in not only my mental health but also the details of my life. I’m not sure if it’s that she takes really good notes, but she seems to remember everything! She also will have lengthy phone conversations with me at the end of her work day if I am in crisis or if I need a med adjustment in between appts which saves me a lot of $!

—-my t has just been trained in emdr. What trauma did u have it for? C-ptsd seems to include almost anything. I looked up havening. Hmm.

[Movingon69]

What is EMDR?

My therapist is awesome. She gives me assignments and really focuses on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, which helps me tremendously. If you are unhappy please find a new therapist.