[EmeraldTurtle]

It is so hard to never have permission to have a bad day.

Everyone thinks that once you’re on meds, you’ll always be happy. That there will never be a down minute, or down day, or down week. It’s so exhausting. I’ve had a bad afternoon — only a few hours — and my husband gets angry at me. My kids get confused. I’m so tired, and I don’t want to eat, but I tried — I sat at the table with my family and ate a few bites. It made me want to throw up. But I had to try. It’s pushing through that is so tiring. With all my being I want to curl up in bed, go to sleep, and wake up tomorrow — hopefully feeling better. I can’t do that, though, because I have to try to pretend that everything is okay — that I am strong. The truth is that I am SO not strong. Days like this sucks. Having people angry at me for being depressed sucks. Having to fake it sucks. Bipolar just sucks.

[Nola0250]

Yes. All of that. It SUCKS *****. Sorry you’ve having a rough day. Been there.

[Wild Coyote]

We need people to give us some room to be authentic, while being offered some understanding.

That said, my family reacts very strongly to any sign of anger or simply just needing some space. We grew up with a very volatile father/situation, which is responsible for the lack of understanding. in my case, people need to adjust their expectations sometimes.

I hope you can voice your needs with those you love and will be met with a fair degree of love and understanding.


WC

[Movingon69]

It does suck. I'm sorry you had a bad day and didn't have the room to feel your authentic self. I hope today is a better day.

Originally Posted by EmeraldTurtle

It is so hard to never have permission to have a bad day.

Everyone thinks that once you’re on meds, you’ll always be happy. That there will never be a down minute, or down day, or down week. It’s so exhausting. I’ve had a bad afternoon — only a few hours — and my husband gets angry at me. My kids get confused. I’m so tired, and I don’t want to eat, but I tried — I sat at the table with my family and ate a few bites. It made me want to throw up. But I had to try. It’s pushing through that is so tiring. With all my being I want to curl up in bed, go to sleep, and wake up tomorrow — hopefully feeling better. I can’t do that, though, because I have to try to pretend that everything is okay — that I am strong. The truth is that I am SO not strong. Days like this sucks. Having people angry at me for being depressed sucks. Having to fake it sucks. Bipolar just sucks.

Hear! Hear! So true.

Btw, I see you're pretty new. Welcome to the forums!

[tecomsin]

When you are feeling up to it, I'd try to push back a bit against their expectations and especially have a chat with your husband to find out why he is getting angry if you are depressed. It's a human right to have an off day.

That is probably part of what is controlling your kids reactions, not you but him -- his anger in particular. If he were nonchalant and take everything in stride then maybe they woudl react differently. Just my thoughts.