[venusss]

I don't feel safe where I am right now. Things happened (I cannot say what, lest I get banned or this deleted at least eh), but... I cannot trust people in my country anymore.


Oh Gahd. I spent four years helping out Ukraine and meanwhile my country went to crap.


I am just scared. It's not anymore things are bad, but... I cannot trust the people. Lots showed their real ugly, unsupportive, hateful colors recently.


I feel bad, anxious as hell, depressed. Not sure how pick myself up. Going through motions in real life, jobs and all.... and wondering what to do next. Too fragile to make any big move now.

[rwwff]

You have my sympathies, a war that can't be won or lost, really drags on a country and brings out the worst in everyone. Hope things improve for you soon.

[jtopinka]

I understand what you're going through.

What helps me is just to remember that sometimes I can't trust myself even!! We are all human and make mistakes and overreact and we all think we know what's best and we all misunderstand others and we all experience hate towards one another in some form. Some people hate the haters and that's still hate.

If I focus on keeping the trust, the commitments and keep in integrity with myself I feel so much better. We never will be able to control other people but our privilege as humans is that we can understand who we are, we can think about what we are thinking about, we can make plans, we can learn to be better. Not everyone takes advantage of those privileges but you can. You can overcome hate by thinking loving thoughts, you can feel better by reflecting on what you can control and that's all that counts.

Also remember that life is 50/50 -- 50% feeling up and 50% feeling down and that's amazing because without feeling down and understanding that place, we never can feel the upside to life.

Allow yourself to be in this space and know that each person only has control over themselves. You get to decide how you get to react to each and every circumstance in your life. Truly understanding that will give you amazing power.

Sending you patience and peace...

[Wild Coyote]

I am sorry you don't feel safe.
This must be very stressful!
I hope you can talk about this with someone?

My heart goes out to you.


WC

I don't know what to say, but hold tight. You'll be in my thoughts.

[~Christina]

Is there any distractions you can use to help settle your mind down ?
Your in my thoughts, I’m so sorry this is happening.

[venusss]

Originally Posted by jtopinka

I understand what you're going through.

What helps me is just to remember that sometimes I can't trust myself even!! We are all human and make mistakes and overreact and we all think we know what's best and we all misunderstand others and we all experience hate towards one another in some form. Some people hate the haters and that's still hate.

If I focus on keeping the trust, the commitments and keep in integrity with myself I feel so much better. We never will be able to control other people but our privilege as humans is that we can understand who we are, we can think about what we are thinking about, we can make plans, we can learn to be better. Not everyone takes advantage of those privileges but you can. You can overcome hate by thinking loving thoughts, you can feel better by reflecting on what you can control and that's all that counts.

Also remember that life is 50/50 -- 50% feeling up and 50% feeling down and that's amazing because without feeling down and understanding that place, we never can feel the upside to life.

Allow yourself to be in this space and know that each person only has control over themselves. You get to decide how you get to react to each and every circumstance in your life. Truly understanding that will give you amazing power.

Sending you patience and peace...

But is posting praises of and calls for genocide, mass murder and death threat "a mistake"? Should one not rightfully hate on these people?


I know I am the one who can choose to react. Like... I can choose to leave now without problems (but where to... oh gawd where to?), leave later when it's even more complicated... stay and hope for the best and be prepared for the worst....


And as for being loving... what else than love would make me living the past four years, spending so much on a country that is not even my own, because I feel they deserve better and deserve to live? To quote M.I.A. "I really love a lot, but I fight the ones who fight me". Impossible to love some. Too traumatized to love some.

I am not talking about some everyday *****iness here...

[venusss]

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

I am sorry you don't feel safe.
This must be very stressful!
I hope you can talk about this with someone?

My heart goes out to you.


WC

Well, I can talk to my social bubble, but that usually ends with being all down and drinking lots of vodka... and soemtimes ending up at some all night bar, being mighty annoyed at the world.

Maybe though, forgetting the questions might help for a while.

[venusss]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Is there any distractions you can use to help settle your mind down ?
Your in my thoughts, I’m so sorry this is happening.

Well, there's pickets and demos I can go on, where I can scream out my mind until I cannot speak anymore (um... any excuses for work why my voice is damaged? I am running out. And since I spend lot of time telling kids not to yell if they want something but be civilized beings... I cannot admit I spend my free time yelling and demanding things...)

[emgreen]

You're in a very tough spot, to be sure. I know you've made it a personal commitment to engage in political education. I think it's wonderful that you've hung on to your core beliefs. I hope things will work out for you...but also wish you safe-haven if you have to make yourself scarce.

Peace.

[venusss]

Yeah, honestly, I don't know anymore.


I just have to do it one day at time and not overthink. And not to argue with idiots so much, since all it does is making me want to crawl into a hole or buy a ticket to Canada or something....