[Garza]

I am new to this and need support group. My husband has not been assessed as being bi-polar and I am trying to get him to a mental health evaluation. His doctor asked him to get an evaluation a year ago after he filled out a self-assessment on himself. He said he kept calling for a referral, and other excuses but I finally found out he never called the center. He has called or been called the police 10 times for things that set him off and this is in the last 2 weeks. I currently have been staying with a friend because I do not feel safe around him. I suffer from depression and take medication, so it is not a healthy environment. I am angry that he is this way, I am mad at myself for not seeing, hurt, sad, and all emotions but I still love him and I feel that getting him help is the best thing I can do. I have engaged others to try to talk to him, reason with him, but he only responds to very monotone, loving advice. At this time, I wish I could provide that to him, but he sees me as the enemy because I called the police (hoping they would see he needed immediate help). The police can do nothing until he tries to hurt himself of me. He has been taking money out of the account and left the balance at 0.00. I did open up another account so I can pay my bills and he has not access. I pray by the Grace of God that I get assistance with getting him into a clinic. I called a Crisis Center and they are still trying to get an appointment. This was yesterday and still waiting. I am trying to stay strong.

Sorry to hear all of that.

Unfortunately, you can't help someone who doesn't want to seek help -- but if he is willing to seek help and agrees to it, then I agree that he can greatly benefit from it if he's committed to it.

What is his opinion on seeking help? Does he agree to help but is too lazy/scared to do it, or is he just making up excuses because he really doesn't want to go?

I can understand why you're afraid of him, and I don't blame you for wanting to stay at a friend's house for your own safety. I can also understand why you're concerned that he needs help.

Maybe he has bipolar, maybe he does not. Either way, he has to accept help, or he will likely relapse if he's forced into it (unless he is psychotic; then he may not be able to fully logic his way through things; been there myself). And it could possibly make him angrier.

[Skeezyks]

Hello Garza: I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral. I'm sorry you are caught in such a difficult situation. One additional forum, here on PC, that may be of interest to you would be the partners of people & caregivers forum. Here's a link:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/part...ivers-support/

And then, since you mentioned depression is something you struggle with, you may find the depression forum to be of interest:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/depression/

Here are links to 10 articles, from PsychCentral's archives. The first 3 talk about denial & how to persuade a loved one to seek professional help. The fourth talks about how to help a loved one who has bipolar disorder to cope. The rest offer tips on managing depression day-to-day:

Denial is a Powerful Impediment to Treatment

How to Persuade Your Loved One to Seek Professional Help

11 Ways to Help a Loved One in Denial

https://psychcentral.com/blog/8-ways...oved-one-cope/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/6-step...ng-depression/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/10-thi...dium=popular17

https://psychcentral.com/blog/9-step...turally/?all=1

https://psychcentral.com/blog/7-ways...dium=popular17

https://psychcentral.com/blog/7-more...nd-medication/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/9-ways...ve-depression/

There is also a book that may be of interest I might mention to you. It's titled: I'm Not Sick, I Don't Need Help. There is a video on YouTube of the author speaking on this subject. Here's a link to that YouTube video:

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

[bizi]

welcome to the forums
sorry it is so hard right now.
How is it going today?
bizi