[UpDownMiddleGround]

I sent a friend an email late one night a few days ago. In the email, I expressed some frustrations that I was having with my T. I also expressed some (SI) thoughts that I have been having. I feel a little betrayed because she contacted my T and then sent my email to her along with a summary of our conversation. I realize that I may have said some things that may have cause some concern, but I told her those thing in confidence. I feel like I don't have anyone to talk to. Sometimes, I just feel like if I just talk about my feelings, REALLY talk about them, I will be ok. But I'm always afraid of what question will follow. One of my biggest fears is being hospitalized and having my employer find out. I've heard people at work talk about other people who have had issues with mental health. I don't want to be a topic of discussion. I also don't want to ever end up in the hospital and not have control over what they do to me. I've visited someone who was behind locked doors in the hospital with no way out. I've experienced being stripped of all of my meds after going into the hospital for physical reasons only to be chemically restrained because I had a panic attack. My doctor claims that he doesn't make anyone go to the hospital. I'm sure he has his way of convincing people to go "voluntarily."

I've had some difficult conversations lately with my pdoc and T. I really wish she had not sent that email. . .

[Victoria'smom]

I'm sorry she betrayed you. She should have just told you to bring it up to your T.

[liveforsummer]

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom

I'm sorry she betrayed you. She should have just told you to bring it up to your T.

I agree. I’d no idea a friend could go straight to a T to discuss another’s mental well being.

[UpDownMiddleGround]

Originally Posted by liveforsummer

I agree. I’d no idea a friend could go straight to a T to discuss another’s mental well being.

She has permission to speak with my T. Since my divorce, she's been a part of my support system, but this just didn't sit well with me. I've concluded that my T listened and read the email but didn't give any information, so I have no problem with how she handled it. And given the information, she followed up as she probably should have. I have a problem with my friend sharing the information with her rather than letting me handle it. I wrote the email because I wanted to "talk" to someone about how I was feeling. I didn't expect it to go farther than between us. From her perspective, it was the type of info that needed sharing. I'm not sure where the line is crossed, but I obviously crossed one with what I shared and she did too. She reminded me that she has only called her on two other occasions since I've started seeing my T (6 years). I get that, but it's going to feel weird going back. I need to figure out what to do with this and how I'm going to lead this conversation with my T when I see her next time.

[sarahsweets]

Do you think you said anything in the email that would have caused her grave concern?