Things you only do when you’re sick

Yes yes yes music! I listen to it louder and louder. I feel it, I separate the instruments in my head and focus on each sound absorbing it digesting it like it’s inside me a part of me I think I can play drums guitar sing I’m a conductor I shoulda been a rock star I listen to it everywhere on repeat over and over and over I move faster to it drive faster to it smile smile smile. When it’s turned off I still hear it the songs repeat in my head sometimes a whole song over and over and over sometimes partial lyrics and I can’t make it stop. It can then become too much but then if it disappears in an instant I miss it immensely. I think it makes me feel alive. The flip side is I can end in the same state but the songs become depressive and I just cry and cry and can’t stop. They can pull up the worst memories and make them even more huge and horrible. So much emotion good and bad is attached to music.

I also become short tempered and annoyed if people make me repeat what I’ve said. I won’t repeat it. I’ll walk away.

Watch Hallmark movies...ugh

I pace non stop. I live in a studio apartment (thankfully on the ground floor so no one can complain when I walk back and forth all night)

Neglect college coursework, highly unusual for me when I'm stable as I love learning and doing well in my classes.

Make tons of plans and goals. Also I become very outgoing, I'm normally not like that at all, I'm generally a introvert. I get a rush and start texting everyone I haven't talked to in awhile.

I start baking and cooking at like 3 in the morning, randomly out of nowhere. I'll get an urge to make cookies or a cake and have to make it that second. I love baking to begin with but I don't typically do it that late at night, especially since my mixer is loud and I'm afraid of waking neighbors up.

Try to get into 5 or 6 books at once. I love reading but generally try to pace myself because I end up getting overwhelmed when I do that.

I get very religious, which is generally a good thing for me, I'm Catholic but when I'm not doing well mentally I've had several times where I think Satan or demons are after me and talking to me.

Music can be helpful for me but it can also be an issue at certain times. It really just depends. Certain types of music like dance/hip hop/rap/electronic like Daft Punk, Eminem.. I love them but if I'm in the wrong frame of mind they can really work me up and that is not something I need during those times. I listen to everything, practically any genre. When I'm doing okay I can listen to mostly anything but when I'm not I try to stick with calm stuff like classical or chillstep

Spend all day in bed. Isolate myself; cancel social plans. Miss work. Ignore the news.