[Fuzzybear]

What is the usual etiquette re “thread hijacking”

I don’t think I’ve ever done this on purpose...

If you strongly disagree with something do you just muzzle yourself?

Or do you try to express your opinion politely?

How much is it frowned on by posters? “Hijacking” of threads

Do I come across as a rude and selfish person?

If I’m not rude and selfish I haven’t done a bad job on my self work since all the family of origin were (and are) abusers (malignant Narcissists)

[Pookyl]

Hi FuZzybear,
I’m not sure about the etiquette. I can tell you that I’ve never found you to be rude or selfish.
If I strongly disagree with a post I ignore it as I don’t handle conflict at all.

[Fuzzybear]

Originally Posted by Pookyl

Hi FuZzybear,
I’m not sure about the etiquette. I can tell you that I’ve never found you to be rude or selfish.
If I strongly disagree with a post I ignore it as I don’t handle conflict at all.

Thank you

I wish I hadn’t tried to heal and grow and just avoided every little conflict

And avoided ever expressing any opinion

Then maybe I wouldn’t be in quite such bad shape now

A therapist verbally battered me for being “avoidant” irl

[Fuzzybear]

I’m feeling like tearing my fur out
I haven’t slept all night
I’m such a “bad” person
Who “deserves” pain
I might have to see a doctor next week

[fern46]

Hi Fuzzybear. I am also not sure about etiquette for this site. Most threads seek and welcome the opinions of others. I think it is typically helpful to hear what others have experienced as it assists me in making sense of my own adventures.

I haven't been around that long, but you've always been kind and polite here. I think there's always a way to express your opinion while maintaining that. Avoidance usually only serves to make matters worse.

This is your thread, so you cannot hijack it. Is there anything you'd like to share? We will listen.

I'm not sure what you have done to feel you are a bad person, but you do not deserve pain.

[bizi]

I agree, perhaps you are referring to another forum.
Hoping not here.
((((HUGS))))
bizi

No need to be so hard on youself, Fuzzybear -- you haven't done anything in the least wrong that I've ever seen here, and I've been here for about a decade(!) So that's a lot of evidence! You do not strike me as rude or selfish at all.

As far as hijacking... it's not hijacking to express your opinion on the topic at hand. It is hijacking to take the thread off on a tangent that has nothing to do with the OP's subject.

As far as expressing yourself, I vote for being polite. *Not* being polite can all too easily lead to flame wars, which are very unpleasant business and can create a hijack situation.

Does that help clarify?

How much is hijacking frowned on here? That is a little harder to gauge. It is frowned on as being inconsiderate to the OP's concerns, but sometimes threads evolve organically. Which can be ok if the OP is part of the conversation and doesn't mind that it has. Others might disagree, but that is my take on it.

Fuzzy Please be gentler on yourself, ok? You're being way too hard on yourself. By all means express your opinion --politely of course -- we want to know what you have to say -- after all, YOU are part of things here too!

[Fuzzybear]

Thanks so much everyone. No it’s not anyone here.

I’ve always felt like I’ve had to walk on eggshells in this world. Since cub hood.

If I don’t always muzzle myself often there is someone who takes an intense dislike to me. Other than occasionally expressing my opinion.. ok maybe more than occasionally sometimes, I don’t know what I’ve been doing wrong... this doesn’t happen every week or even every year or even every few years to an extreme degree ... some over time have hated me and made that obvious. Mostly at work irl but occasionally online too (not in this forum)

I wonder if the therapist who said I had a “paranoid part” was right...

Tbh I feel like he wasn’t honest with me at times. He was extremely mean and cruel at times and literally turned on a dime.

Again, what did I do to deserve him telling me how much he didn’t like me or care about me. And another therapist turned on me too but with this therapist I didn’t trust her and she got frustrated..

[bizi]

OMG you had a terrible therapist, the mean one. I hope you did not stay with him.
You deserve to be treated with dignity and respect.
YOu are paying them.
bizi

[MickeyCheeky]

I'm so sorry you're hurting so much, Fuzzybear! I have never seen you acting unpolitely! I believe you're a STRONG, WONDERFUL PERSON! I don't think disagreeing with someone and expressing your own opinion about something means that you're "hijacking" their thread, although everyone is different of course and everyone has his/her own opinions! Please don't be so hard on yourself! You're NOT a bad person and you DON'T deserve to hurt or to suffer! Nobody does, certainly NOT YOU! You've been nothign but kind, sweet and supportive to EVERYONE in your life and you deserve to be treated the same way! Please keep posting and writing as much as you like it, need it and want it! Don't let other people discourage you! I agree with what all the other wise, wonderful posters have already wisely said better than I ever could! You deserve to be happy! You deserve to get better and to feel good! You deserve to live an happy, fulfilling life just like everyone else does! You deserve ALL OF THIS and MUCH, MUCH more! We all care about you here and we ALL ALWAYS care about what you post! We all love you here and we all love your kind, sweet, supportive messages and posts! Feel free to vent and write as much as you need it and want to! You know we won't judge you here! I promise you that I won't judge you! I'm so sorry you have to deal with all of this, Fuzzybear