Bipolar Questions Version 5

Not anymore. I lost mine to bipolar.

Q: Do you sleep with one sheet or two?

Right now, none. I am sleeping on top of a kind of spendy weighted blankie that does not seem to be doing a whole lot for me, with a nice quilt on top of me. It's perfect.

Q Will you follow the US presidential election, or try to avod it?

I avoid all of the news. I don't even know who is fighting for the nomination at the moment. I haven't read the news since I got out of the hospital over a year ago.

The effect has been wonderful. I do not stress over things I cannot control. I no longer focus on the negativity in the world. I use my energy to create what I want to in my own life and to serve the greater good of others. I don't think I'll ever go back to being sucked into every story like I used to be. I used to believe it was critical and impacted my life, but I have proven to myself it only served to imprison my mind and my heart.

Sure, policy changes can affect me and yes, I realize some believe it is my civic duty to participate. I say to those people that I am a strategist and I am trained to look for the value chain. I am making much more of a positive impact on my life, the lives of those I interact with and my community following this new path. I'd ask them to open their minds a bit and see contribution can come in infinite forms and people should be free to follow what generates the highest possible yield. I support them in whatever path they choose and ask for the same in return.

What is your favorite aspect of spring?

I guess I shouldn't write this, but my annual mood upswing, which is often a full hypomanic to even manic episode. No, I don't want to reach full blown mania, but mild hypomania is lovely. Also, there is often a very nice feeling and smell to the air. And I love flowers.

Q: When you are well or fairly well, what is your favorite time of the day? And why?

First thing in the morning, definitely.

Q: Have you ever rafted or canoed down a river?

Yes, a lot of times each summer in college when I was a camp counselor.

Do you enjoy camping?

Yes, I really do, unless the weather is horrible. My husband used to, but has stopped liking the idea as he's grown older. That's sad, but I understand why. I'm a bit younger than him and don't have the reasons he has. Also, he's always been more of a city boy. I'm a little more country/nature. For example, I love fishing. He doesn't.

Q: Tell me about an adventure you had in the past.

So when I was in college I belonged to a support group for women who had been abused. We decided to have a retreat at this cabin my college owned that could be rented out. I had never been there and needed to do some work before I went out so I went alone and without knowing exactly what I was doing. But I was told to follow the path from the parking lot. I got there, unloaded my blanket and backpack and headed down the path. I walked and walked and walked and the little light I thought was the cabin never got closer. In fact it was getting farther away. The path met another path so I took it and then turned back when it was blocked by fallen logs. I repeated this for hours, struggling to find the first path before my flashlight died. I had pretty much reconciled myself to spending the night in the woods when I saw a flashlight. I took off running and it was a few other people from my group. I had been on the wrong path for all that time and the correct path was just a short few minutes walk from the parking lot. I never forgot the sense of resignation that I felt knowing I had done all I could and that I could get out in the light but was in for a hard night.

Q: Do you belong to a gym or Y?

gym?

no... absolutely not!

lol even the thought of it makes my toes curl!

I am so not interested in looking after my health it's a little bit embarrassing

do you agree with the statement that breakfast is the most important meal of the day?

BeyondtheRainbow, thank you for sharing about your adventure. That is a cool story. I can imagine how you must have felt, and yet do believe that we always do eventually find our way when lost.

I sort of think so, but I'm sure others may disagree. We do need that fuel to get us running well during the day. I think many people who go to sleep at 11 pm or later, don't eat breakfast until 6 am to even 8 am. That's a lot of hours between meals. More hours than between other meals. When I was working, I often ate almost nothing for breakfast. I'd only drink a cup of coffee. I did make it to lunch, though I sometimes even forgot that, but I can now recognize that it was not a healthy habit. I'm much happier nowadays eating a nice breakfast. Sometimes I'm too tired to make a nice one, but I do eat something of substance (cereal/oatmeal, OJ, and sometimes yogurt).

Q: What is a concern you have about the world around you?

That people are so concerned with their boxes that they have forgotten geometry offers us endless other options that can be a lot more fun than cubes.

Favorite pizza toppings?

I love pepperoni pizza but I'm on a low-carb diet now (lost 14 lbs) - so now I'm enjoying cauliflower crust pizza

Question: Do you belong to any social groups (book clubs, knitters club, Church groups etc)

No, not at this time. I used to often go to a DBSA (Depression & Bipolar Support Alliance) support group, but don't now, and that's not exactly a social group, though we did sometimes have social gatherings separate from the support group. I have, in the past, been to one MeetUp of "women who don't have children". It wasn't quite for me. Most of the women there talked about looking for boyfriends and about their jobs. I'm a happily married woman and currently on disability. So it wasn't my place. I'm more a study/class person than a social group person. Since graduating from university in 1993, I can't even remember how many classes (of various types) I've taken. It would be a long list. Some I didn't last long in, because of my bipolar disorder, but I'm perpetually determined to study. I've always been.

Q: Can you identify specific triggers from the past that seem to be regular in bringing on hypomania and/or mania?

Caffeine. I know most of us can have limited caffeine but I'm not one of them. Late Spring; I always get manic/hypo between late May and late June.

What if any food are you craving right now?

I just had a vanilla protein shake in milk.

What's your dream pet?

I adore my precious cats and I would also love to own a red fox. There are people who do, but you have to have land and the space to build an enclosure.

What do you think of mindfulness meditation?

It is helpful although sometimes I need someone to remind me to start using it. Sometimes my therapist will give me a note to remind me to do it outside of his office.

Are you preparing for the COVID virus?

I work in a hospital that had the first several COVID-19 patients there - so it is on all of our minds. I'm not doing anything extraordinary - just general good hand hygiene and trying not to touch door handles/elevator buttons etc while at work

Question: Do you have an Emotional Support Animal?

I have 2 cats that are pretty supportive but I don't know what goes into having them declared ESAs

Does the time change mess with your sleep or other routines?

It made it hard to fall asleep last night. I had to take prn Seroquel regular on top of my usual evening medications (including 600 mg Seroquel XR). I had some trouble getting up on time this morning. It would have been on time before the time change, but one hour late according to the new one.

Q: Do you ever stuff feelings about something/someone?

All the time......I'm very bad about that because it comes out in feeling guilty. We're working on this in therapy although I don't know how much we'll be tackling on the phone for the next month or more. I find phone therapy to be more chit-chat than therapy. Which is fine, social skills are one of my goals so having a normal conversation without my poor social skills coming out. I just wish we could have finished what we were talking about before this started. I also hope that my pdoc goes to a skype or something like that format.

Are you continuing to see your therapist/pdoc while being told to stay home throughout the emergency?

No....

Are you feeling tired?

Yes, always

Are you working from home until the virus scare blows over?

I'm actually on disability right now. I was going to try and get a job at a local amusement park for the summer but I've decided not to for a few different reasons, one being COVID-19.

What's your favorite musical instrument?

Piano

Do you wish you lived in a cave or could hibernate?