(I private messaged this to Fern46 but will post it generally here also as i worry she may be too busy to respond in time.)

I've been trying to recover from my hypo-mania in September and my acute fear reaction in early October and subsequent exhaustion but life keeps getting in the way. Six issues have come up. I dealt with the medical, security and plumbing issues but three more are still clamoring for attention.

All i want to do is rest and relax and recharge and heal from intense-sensory-overload but things keep coming up and demanding my attention. Yesterday i was functioning so poorly that i wandered around in downtown rush-hour traffic for 2.5 hours from 6:00am to 8:30am all strung-out on sleep-deprivation looking for an address without my glasses as i couldn't find them and everything was blurry and it wasn't safe and i kept worrying i would make a miss step and get run-over.

I finally found the address only to be told that i needed an additional document to get the picture ID i need to unlock my bank account so that was a big SNAFU. To make matters worse i carried on to McDonald's to have greasy breakfast as i was starving but that was just another whole Hell of over-stimulation with the crowds and the cleaner throwing around heavy wrought-iron tables and chairs and making such a frightening amount of noise it got surreal.

I felt better once i ate but i still just should have come home and eaten what little food i have in the house in peace and privacy, even if it was just a bag of chips. I keep making these decisions that are not in my best interest and i can't seem to stop myself. I keep thinking that EVERYTHING is an emergency, when really, these things are urgent, but i can live off my credit card indefinitely (just transferring in my income thru online banking) and i have eleven more months to submit my travel cancellation insurance claim and i've lived without current ID for years and why is it suddenly a "crisis" NOW? Nothing *HAS* to be done right this second.

Yesterday i finally came home and rested / meditated for nine hours before i could function again. I'm having a quiet day at home today but want to go to a Halloween celebration tomorrow and my OA meeting on Monday.

What do you think? Should i cancel everything until i'm functioning again?

I don't really feel safe enough to leave my home at the moment after the horror of yesterday stumbling around in traffic. I don't feel i'm functioning well enough to cope with any more stimulation. I want to have the fun of tomorrow and the support of OA on Monday but feel it's a risk to go out when my consciousness is so shredded and i'm in such a precarious state. A psychologist once called me a "Crisis Junkie" and i think she is right. I just have to put my foot down and say STOP ALL THE STIMULATION even if it is good positive stimulation (fun and support). Stress is still stress even if it's positive stress.

It will still delay my healing if i put on a costume and take buses and participate in the Halloween celebration with the kids at the mall (going to be a "Mad Hatter's Halloween" with the longest table ever and should be hilarious, but do i really need that excitement NOW? There's always next year for Halloween).

OA will always be there. I don't absolutely need to go this week. I can miss a week. I have to go to deliver the key FOB but i can skeedaddle once i turn it over to someone else. That'll mean four buses round-trip but i could probably get it over with in 90 minutes and be home to peace and privacy and (hopefully, in time) sanity.

I guess i am just looking for support re making a decision to stay home and heal in peace and privacy and low-sensory-input. Everyone always says not to isolate and to reach out for support but i feel like if i have to look upon one more human face my head will explode!

I know my suggestion involves money, but would an Uber to one of the places help?

If you love Halloween and would feel you missed out not going, create a pros and cons and yes, you can always leave early. If you can pass, that would be more stressful for me than a 12 Step program. But you are you. You must decide.

I hope the stressors calm soon. I know what you're talking about!

[fern46]

Check your PMs. I can post my response here if you want.

[~Christina]

When I have been running around like a chicken with my head cut off I often have to just STOP !

Stop and physically write everything I need to do on paper just as it tumbles out of my mind in no particular order

I fully believe there are times that we just need a break from the world.. I disconnect from social media, PC and anything that can deliver news. I only respond to my daughters texts. I typically give myself 3 days to just do what I want to .. be it sleep a lot, lounge in bed , take a bath or 3 showers a day , stay in my jammies, read books, binge watch movies or anything that doesn’t have commercials. Usually there is comfort food involved. When day 4 rolls around I “ usually” feel better... more rested.. I can then look at my list and see what truly needs attending too.

Yes isolating is not something that is going to be healthy long term BUT checking out for a few days is perfectly okay and needed sometimes and we must focus on our own self care... it’s something we all tend to ignore when life gets busy.

I agree with BirdDancer about taking an Uber... you can go enjoy and go home when you have had enough and none of the stress of bus routes

[Wild Coyote]

Hi
Nice to have you posting!

I often find myself in a similar predicament.

I think it really depends apon what the noise sensitivity means for you? Is it a part of a prodrome, signaling a potentially more serious impending condition?

Does this sensitivity abate without taking time out?

I cannot make a recommendation based upon my own experience, as your experience may be very different.

When I start experiencing noise sensitivity, I have to start retreating/isolating some. If is continues, I must isolate more. For me, this sound sensitivity often results in an agitated hypomania.. Interestingly, I also experience noise sensitivity as an aura of impending migraine. Both situations, an agitated hypomania and/or migraine usually comes about for me when I am sleep-deprived.

I think it is most important to look at your own pattern. Does this sensitivity stop without retreating?

I wish you the best in whatever you decide to do.
Please do take good care!
I hope to see you around!
Much Love

Thanks for the replies Fern, BirdDancer, Christina and WildCoyote! Many good ideas! I like the idea of "checking-out" for a few days the best. So that's what i'm gonna do. I still like communicating online tho. It gives me some tame company thru a medium i control. So i'll be around! I like the suggestion of an Uber but i'm not set up with them. I made two tries to set up and account without success so i abandoned it. But it DID give me the idea of taking a taxi so tomorrow when i HAVE to go out to deliver the key FOB i will do that. Just don't trust myself to take four buses without hysteria.

I DID have some fun today coloring my hair black. It's not jet black like i wanted but it's a fun change.

[*Beth*]

I am so glad you had fun with your hair! My philosophy on that is we have hair because it's the only part of our body that is 100% fun. We can do whatever we want to it; it will grow back.

I so well understand the feeling of sensitivity to noise. Your description of the sound of the wrought-iron tables made me cringe as I read it.

I hope you did take a down time. Since you posted this yesterday, the Halloween celebration is today...all the transit changes sound rather overwhelming. For that reason I hope you are able to take Uber or Lyft if you've decided to go.

Keep us posted so we know how you're doing.

Hi BethRags, thanks for chiming in on my thread! Don't think we've met -- i'm Jane. As for hair being a fun part of our body, yes, yes, yes, i agree but i can think of one other part of our bodies that is fun too! Wink! I actually decided against the Halloween party and am i ever glad i did. It would have been overwhelming. I've never used a car service and i'm not up to opening an account just now so tomorrow when i absolutely HAVE to go out i'm taking a taxi. It will be expensive but my health is priceless and there's a risk to letting this poor health continue. I need to be strong and healthy as soon as possible to deal with whatever life has in store for me.

Christina suggested watching stuff without commercials and it struck me that i haven't been able to watch my soaps because of the commercials. So i tried Netflix and lucked into the new "Breaking Bad" movie and had a grand time and it's soooooooooo good to get back to watching again, i have really been missing it. I look forward to more long calm days watching til my heart's content! Yay Christina!!!

[downandlonely]

I'm not sure what OA is. Is it some sort of support group? If so, I would try to go as I always feel better when I go to my depression support group.

I do think you made the right call skipping the Halloween party though. Sounds like it would have been overwhelming to you.

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by whatever2013

Hi BethRags, thanks for chiming in on my thread! Don't think we've met -- i'm Jane. As for hair being a fun part of our body, yes, yes, yes, i agree but i can think of one other part of our bodies that is fun too! Wink! I actually decided against the Halloween party and am i ever glad i did. It would have been overwhelming. I've never used a car service and i'm not up to opening an account just now so tomorrow when i absolutely HAVE to go out i'm taking a taxi. It will be expensive but my health is priceless and there's a risk to letting this poor health continue. I need to be strong and healthy as soon as possible to deal with whatever life has in store for me.


Christina suggested watching stuff without commercials and it struck me that i haven't been able to watch my soaps because of the commercials. So i tried Netflix and lucked into the new "Breaking Bad" movie and had a grand time and it's soooooooooo good to get back to watching again, i have really been missing it. I look forward to more long calm days watching til my heart's content! Yay Christina!!!

I’m glad my advice helped

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by whatever2013

Hi BethRags, thanks for chiming in on my thread! Don't think we've met -- i'm Jane. As for hair being a fun part of our body, yes, yes, yes, i agree but i can think of one other part of our bodies that is fun too! Wink! I actually decided against the Halloween party and am i ever glad i did. It would have been overwhelming. I've never used a car service and i'm not up to opening an account just now so tomorrow when i absolutely HAVE to go out i'm taking a taxi. It will be expensive but my health is priceless and there's a risk to letting this poor health continue. I need to be strong and healthy as soon as possible to deal with whatever life has in store for me.

Christina suggested watching stuff without commercials and it struck me that i haven't been able to watch my soaps because of the commercials. So i tried Netflix and lucked into the new "Breaking Bad" movie and had a grand time and it's soooooooooo good to get back to watching again, i have really been missing it. I look forward to more long calm days watching til my heart's content! Yay Christina!!!

Hi Jane, it's nice to meet you

It's sounds to me like you have made the best choice. Good for you!

It's usually really difficult for me to sit down and watch a show, movie, whatever. Then as soon as i do it I relax substantially.

I want to mention - when my car is out of commission I have always taken a taxi. I don't have a cell phone connected to the internet (I'm very low-tech), but a couple of weeks ago I had a dead battery and needed to get to a therapy appointment. I was somewhat frantic, so I got the idea to just check Lyft's online site. It ended up being incredibly easy. The driver came exactly at the time I wanted and it was less expensive than a taxi would have been.

[veronicadolittle]

Just more support here. I was having similar issues with overstimulation and being near a breaking point recently. I took two weeks off from almost everything. It has been so nice, I've left the house I think three times in the last two weeks. I am now feeling much better and ready to re-engage. So I also support cancelling everything for a while.

Also, to maintain health, I recommend scheduling regular rest days into your schedule. These are days where you don't leave the house and don't do any real work either. I need 2-3 of these a week to stay functional.