[giddykitty]

Felt like this needed a separate thread today. I don't know. Maybe I'm crying out for attention, but isn't that what this place is for?? It's not THAT bad though and I feel guilty when others seem to have it worse than me, but hey! this is hard for ME...

so, not sure if I'm just sad or if my mood is dropping. Probably the former. Weather today is cloudy plus more difficult is there's an online buddy of mine considering taking a break. I'd be kinda lost without this person and might not see them for a long time. This **** gets to me a lot. Half invested in someone and they leave, even some that I know less bother me, but this is someone I've known for close to a year and a half and it's one I always talk to when I visit the place. I don't have many others on that site I talk to and I'd likely disappear too if they did. *sigh

[Daonnachd]

Don't worry. Post what you need, when you need it.

Whatever the cause, I hope your mood recovers quickly.

[~Christina]

Do you know why they want a break ? Maybe they need to practice self care ?

I just came back here after about a months break. I needed it.

I’ve been upset over losing online friends, it can seem like a real friendship. That can really be hard.

Is it someone you can connect with outside of the site? I’ve tried it a few times and it is never the same, but at least they’re not gone.

What is weird is connecting with someone on Facebook. You end up seeing more of the person and things you don’t admire, and it transforms the way you feel because you’re not just talking about a few narrow things you’re both interested in.

Sorry you're going through this. I've lost online friends because they've quit, taken breaks, found other friends, etc.. It sucks because friends are friends, whether they're online friends or not. :/

Are you the kind of person who likes to approach people? Could you approach other people on that site to see if they want to be friends with you? I don't mean like, "hey, u wanna b frendz??!?" But just hit them up and see if something becomes of it.

I like to compliment people as a way to make friends. For example, they may post a picture of new sneakers they got. Then I PM them and say, "I really like those sneakers! Just wanted to say that. <3" I'm not saying be a suckup or anything, but if you like something they do or like something they have, why not tell them? Or if they're feeling bad, send a PM asking if they're ok and if they'd like to talk.

Initiating convos is hard for sure, but it can be a rewarding experience if you've never done it before (or if you've rarely done it).

[Nola0250]

This is totally the place to cry out for attention. At least, I do it all the time!

It sucks when someone you've depended on fades. I hate it. I do think, though, that it's a reminded that we need some redundancy in our support systems. It can be really hard to build and maintain that through depressive periods. That's definitely what holds me back - I hate to develop a new friendship and then be a ****** friend when I'm down. That's where this site really helps, whether I'm up or down, I know there are friends here. Keep posting please!

[Mini2018]

Originally Posted by Nola0250

It can be really hard to build and maintain that through depressive periods. That's definitely what holds me back - I hate to develop a new friendship and then be a ****** friend when I'm down. That's where this site really helps, whether I'm up or down, I know there are friends here. Keep posting please!

This is where I think we underestimate the strength of a true friend. Yes, we can unintentionally put them through hell, and that hurts, both them and us, knowing we've played a large part of it. The only options are withdrawal or preparation. I get scared when my bestie disappears, both my insecurities and for her health and wellbeing. And just not being able to help. Preparation helps us as friends, knowing what to expect from each other at different times when one or the other or even both of us goes into self preservation mode. Personally having such a small support network makes it that much harder.

What I will say is that anything thats worth the reward hurts in some way and has to be fought for. When it comes to a good friend, a really good friend, I'd rather break a little myself than be alone. When I'm really down, They're able to leave until the normal me returns. Either way it can and does hurt. That's where you try and focus on the reason why its happening....its not by choice....but the illness. A true friend thinks likewise

[Unrigged64072835]

Online friendships can ebb and flow like RL friendships. Sometimes things run their course.

Let him go with grace, and if he comes back, great.

In the meantime find more people you can talk to.

[pirilin]

Post away. Let it all hang out.

[giddykitty]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Do you know why they want a break ? Maybe they need to practice self care ?

I just came back here after about a months break. I needed it.

They are searching for something missing in their life. Yea I get it. It's still hard for me.

[giddykitty]

Originally Posted by key tones

I’ve been upset over losing online friends, it can seem like a real friendship. That can really be hard.

Is it someone you can connect with outside of the site? I’ve tried it a few times and it is never the same, but at least they’re not gone.

What is weird is connecting with someone on Facebook. You end up seeing more of the person and things you don’t admire, and it transforms the way you feel because you’re not just talking about a few narrow things you’re both interested in.

Yet to see if we'll connect outside. I seem to recall trying before and they kinda ducked out of it.

[giddykitty]

Originally Posted by Fharraige

Online friendships can ebb and flow like RL friendships. Sometimes things run their course.

Let him go with grace, and if he comes back, great.

In the meantime find more people you can talk to.

This took me a long time to understand/come to terms with with another relationship. I desperately didn't want it to end and it did. I don't let myself attach as much anymore, but it's still hard for me/in my nature to attach. Sigh but you're right.

[giddykitty]

hmmm, I thought I made a thread about this like in the anxiety forums, but I don't see it. Seems I'd have mentioned something about it somewhere though. At any rate, it's on a similar topic to this original post, so I'm just gonna bump this so people don't have to feel like repeating things they've already said to me. In this case, this is (or was) about a friend that didn't go missing because of me but because of personal issues, so I'm not taking it personally, but I'm sad/scared/worried for them and us at the same time...Again, this is news from early February, so I'm kinda updating on that.

UPDATES

Heard from the friend and things seem to be looking up. (They've moved from the hospital to residency...or is it vice versa? I'm a bit ignorant since my depression never got that serious, but apparently they're happy about this). Unfortunately, another friend has now gone MIA. She did mention she might do this, but changed her mind. Apparently, she changed it again though. Sigh! Hopefully she'll be ok! I'm trying not to worry though.

More News

Ok, so I already mentioned the second friend. I got confirmation today from our mutual that she did in fact have to go IP. I really hope everything gets better for her. She's definitely a big presence and is missed by her friends. And our mutual, poor little dear, has been crying. Honestly, I'm a little nervous about how much to try to help because she's so young and I don't want any trouble in that area (such a shame really. I mean friends can be friends at any age, but I can also understand the fear of internet strangers). At any rate, it's just a difficult time for us. :/