I thought it would be interesting to see these numbers. I know some people's numbers will obviously be higher simply because of their age (more years with the disorder).

I know that mixed episodes and ultra ultra rapid cycling are experienced by many. Perhaps consider counting it as a hypomania/mania, if the mixed episode or ultra ultra rapid cycling was more severe on the hypomanic/manic end than the depressed end. And though I know some people dislike the DSM-5, perhaps count "episodes" as ones that lasted at least 4 days in a row, or if shorter, resulted in psychiatric hospitalization.

If this thread is at all popular, I'll create a similar one for depressive episodes. I'm not sure if I'll create one for psychosis.

If you're willing, consider adding a post mentioning how many years you've had bipolar disorder, with your choice from the poll. I realize some episodes are educated guesses, from years before formal diagnosis.

I'm pretty sure my bipolar disorder began at 14 years old. It's been about 35 years since then, and 15 years since my official bipolar type 1 diagnosis. A few of the over 10 hypomanic/manic episodes I indicated above only reached hypomanic level, before returning to stable or switching to depression. Most, but not all, of my episodes that reached full blown manic included psychosis. Many of my hypomanic/manic episodes lasted several weeks (or even months, in a few cases), particularly before I was properly medicated. Since then, they usually last only a week or two.

I have no idea, but probably 5-10 if I were to guesstimate (if we do not include those times I went off my meds). My issues started at age 14 and now I'm 29, so it's been literally 15 years since it all started, and I had no idea I even had bipolar until 5 years ago.

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

I have no idea, but probably 5-10 if I were to guesstimate (if we do not include those times I went off my meds). My issues started at age 14 and now I'm 29, so it's been literally 15 years since it all started, and I had no idea I even had bipolar until 5 years ago.

Thanks for sharing, bluebicyle! Out of curiosity, why would you not include the times you went off of the meds?

[Jennyanydots]

For me: episodes: 2010 (diagnosed), 2012, 2014, 2017, 2018 - so 5 for me in 10 years. I guess I'm due this year.

Originally Posted by BirdDancer

Thanks for sharing, bluebicyle! Out of curiosity, why would you not include the times you went off of the meds?

I don't include those times because I basically triggered myself... chemically. In other words, I would have never had as many episodes as I have, had I stayed consistent on my meds. I mean, I would literally rapidly cycle with manic or depressive episodes every month or two because I would take my meds for like 1 week and then skip the next week, etc.. It would have been better if I either stayed on my meds or stopped them altogether, rather than constantly switching back and forth between taking meds and not taking them.

[Moose72]

I chose "Can't even approximate" because I know for sure I had a manic episode last year in April/May- pdoc confirmed it? But how do I count the times that weren't "official"? How do I account for all the times before I was diagnosed? I have a memory of riding my bike while listening to upbeat choral music and singing along with the high part with much enthousiasm! I guess I was hypomanic that day. But that's just one time of many. How many times have I gotten dancy and bouncy and talkative? About a million I'd say. Is that hypomania or just my personality? My friend thinks I'm not sick when I get like that. Where does my natural personality stop and hypo/mania begin? It's gradual sometimes. That's why it's hard for me to spot. I was diagnosed at age 33. I,m now 48 so that's 15 years ago but I know I experienced both hypo and mania before being diagnosed- and psychosis for that matter.

[bpcyclist]

Age 56. Official diagnosis age 41. Incorrect diagnosis of MDD age 35, when I became addicted to tramadol, horribly. Awful, incredibly dangerous drug for someone with MDD or bp 1 or 2. Should be taken off the market.

Hypo episodes nearly constantly as a child, inlcuding under the age of ten. Too many to count. Also, super irritable at times.

First major depressive episode age 17.

First psychotic episode age 41.

First full-on vision age 41. I have had many of these. People consider them psychosis off-shoots, but I do not, as 90% of mine have all come completely, 100% true in every single respect. I hate tehm as a result, because you cannot stop what is previewed from happening, no matter what measures you may try to take. They are preordainged and will happen, virtually 100% of the time.

Now, most episodes are a mix of mania (dysphoric/agitated/raging) and psychosis.

Spent this past October through about three weeks ago mostly psychotic and manic most of the time, more that 50% of teh time, overall, I would say.

I do experience quite a few of what I term mini-episodes, which may be only a couple of days in length. These can be any kind, including, still, sometimes, depressive. As I have shared, the DSM-V does not describe my life accurately at all. As I have also said, my pdoc asked the publisher for one. He said he needed a nice, new door stop... He makes me laugh...

Originally Posted by Moose72

I chose "Can't even approximate" because I know for sure I had a manic episode last year in April/May- pdoc confirmed it? But how do I count the times that weren't "official"? How do I account for all the times before I was diagnosed? I have a memory of riding my bike while listening to upbeat choral music and singing along with the high part with much enthousiasm! I guess I was hypomanic that day. But that's just one time of many. How many times have I gotten dancy and bouncy and talkative? About a million I'd say. Is that hypomania or just my personality? My friend thinks I'm not sick when I get like that. Where does my natural personality stop and hypo/mania begin? It's gradual sometimes. That's why it's hard for me to spot. I was diagnosed at age 33. I,m now 48 so that's 15 years ago but I know I experienced both hypo and mania before being diagnosed- and psychosis for that matter.

Hi Moose72. Your questions are incredibly good ones, that I think many of us have asked ourselves. I certainly have. It is difficult to separate personality from bipolar episode, sometimes. I mean, we all have the right to have extremely good days in life! People without bipolar disorder do, often. I think it's especially difficult if you are a naturally high energy and upbeat person. Like I have always been very gabby. Am I simply a Chatty Cathy sometimes? Or is it my bipolar disorder?

What has helped me in the recent past was to write about extra special experiences (great and horrible). I know that while I was living them, they seemed within the range of normal. Then I compared the experiences to other times of my life, and to other people's experiences, and I realized that they must have been episodes.

I voted 5 to 10

I had 1 before diagnoses, I had at least 5 that resulted in extended hospital stays, in the last 4 years I've had at least 3.. so that toals 8.

seems a fair guess


I had at least 1 episode before diagnoses,

I've had I think 4 manic episodes and I'm not even sure how many hypomanic episodes but a lot. I voted 10+ in the poll.

[Sometimes psychotic]

Only 1 that I’m aware of.....

[oldbutwise]

This should be interesting. I'm a math guy so let's run the numbers.

I recently turned 52. I started having hypomanic episodes no later than 7. So that gives us 45 years. I'm a rapid cycler. So I have hypomanic episodes 4-6 times a year. So bare minimum I've had 180 to 270 hypomanic episodes in my lifetime.

Hmm. I've had at least as many episodes as a hit TV show. Does anybody have the contact info for NBC?

I put can't estimate. 57. First major depressive episode was at 20, preceded by having a LOT of fun and sociability. So...37+ years. But knew pretty much nothing about BP, and never thought to consider it because it was the depression I was aware of. Somehow, despite copious evidence, I didn't actually get dx'd till like 44 (why can I never remember exactly?!) Major AHA time when BP was revealed to me. And then the looking back started. There were many, many times when it seemed hypomania was at play. I'd scarcely know where to begin.

If/when I crossed over into mania, I don't know, seeing how the line is not always obvious, and I don't recall anyone telling me specifically. (Hence my confusion over the II and I dx's-- I think it was hallucinations that caused them to change it, but again, no one told me). But hypomania? Lots. (Not so much anymore, but when I was younger, it was left and right.)

Originally Posted by oldbutwise

This should be interesting. I'm a math guy so let's run the numbers.

I recently turned 52. I started having hypomanic episodes no later than 7. So that gives us 45 years. I'm a rapid cycler. So I have hypomanic episodes 4-6 times a year. So bare minimum I've had 180 to 270 hypomanic episodes in my lifetime.

Hmm. I've had at least as many episodes as a hit TV show. Does anybody have the contact info for NBC?

That is a huge number, oldbutwise! Did you ever have a year, or more, without any significant mood issues? Emphasis on "significant".

Originally Posted by Innerzone

I put can't estimate. 57. First major depressive episode was at 20, preceded by having a LOT of fun and sociability. So...37+ years. But knew pretty much nothing about BP, and never thought to consider it because it was the depression I was aware of. Somehow, despite copious evidence, I didn't actually get dx'd till like 44 (why can I never remember exactly?!) Major AHA time when BP was revealed to me. And then the looking back started. There were many, many times when it seemed hypomania was at play. I'd scarcely know where to begin.

If/when I crossed over into mania, I don't know, seeing how the line is not always obvious, and I don't recall anyone telling me specifically. (Hence my confusion over the II and I dx's-- I think it was hallucinations that caused them to change it, but again, no one told me). But hypomania? Lots. (Not so much anymore, but when I was younger, it was left and right.)

It is interesting looking back and FINALLY realizing past episodes when previously there was no insight!

I am pretty sure the bipolar diagnosis was not made nearly as often decades ago, as it is now. Of course I don't know any stats on that. I wish I did.

[BipolaRNurse]

I voted for 10+ because I didn't know I was bipolar until I was diagnosed at 53. Looking back, I probably had numerous episodes, especially of depression, and didn't really experience mania till around age 35. But I had rapid-cycling BP for quite a while, both mania and depression, and the reason I'm no longer rapid-cycling is I'm finally on the right combination of meds in the right amounts. I must've had easily 2 dozen episodes in the time between the time I was diagnosed and the time I really became stable a couple of years ago.

[The_little_didgee]

2 episodes.

They were both caused by antidepressants. Prozac made me manic and psychotic at the age of 18. I ended up in hospital. The second time I was hyper and euphoric for about 3 weeks when I started taking Cipralex. My doctor told me it was hypomania.

[oldbutwise]

Originally Posted by BirdDancer

That is a huge number, oldbutwise! Did you ever have a year, or more, without any significant mood issues? Emphasis on "significant".

I'm honestly not sure. I'm don't really know what qualifies as significant. I haven't been in the hospital since August 2011 but every 9 to 12 months I overdraw my bank account by $450 to $500. I'm pretty out of control when that happens.

Yeah. I just read that back. I posted in another thread about how the meds I was on messed me up pretty badly. I've never been on the right meds, have I? I see my new psychiatrist on the 30th. I knew I was going to tell him about my Zyprexa and Paxil. I guess we're going to be discussing medication for a lot longer than I thought.

Thank you BirdDancer. Who knows how long I would have gone on not realizing just how serious my situation is? I would have told him that I cycle 4 to 6 times a year and not know to tell him it gets that bad.

The doctor who first diagnosed me really didn't tell me anything about bipolar disorder. I've pretty much had to learn everything on my own. He was there so long that when he left, the doctors who came in after him probably just assumed he told me pretty much everything I needed to know.

Thank you everybody in this section also. Yes BirdDancer asked the question that made me realize this, but you all helped make that moment possible in ways you may not even be aware of.

I guess my doctor and I are going to be discussing a lot of things for a lot longer than I thought, and for more appointments than I thought. Well, at least now I know that while my first doctor was very nice and tried to be helpful, he really didn't do me too many favors, did he? Someone who comes along and reads this and sees that their doctor didn't educate them either will know to change doctors.

Originally Posted by oldbutwise

I'm honestly not sure. I'm don't really know what qualifies as significant. I haven't been in the hospital since August 2011 but every 9 to 12 months I overdraw my bank account by $450 to $500. I'm pretty out of control when that happens.

Yeah. I just read that back. I posted in another thread about how the meds I was on messed me up pretty badly. I've never been on the right meds, have I? I see my new psychiatrist on the 30th. I knew I was going to tell him about my Zyprexa and Paxil. I guess we're going to be discussing medication for a lot longer than I thought.

Thank you BirdDancer. Who knows how long I would have gone on not realizing just how serious my situation is? I would have told him that I cycle 4 to 6 times a year and not know to tell him it gets that bad.

The doctor who first diagnosed me really didn't tell me anything about bipolar disorder. I've pretty much had to learn everything on my own. He was there so long that when he left, the doctors who came in after him probably just assumed he told me pretty much everything I needed to know.

Thank you everybody in this section also. Yes BirdDancer asked the question that made me realize this, but you all helped make that moment possible in ways you may not even be aware of.

I guess my doctor and I are going to be discussing a lot of things for a lot longer than I thought, and for more appointments than I thought. Well, at least now I know that while my first doctor was very nice and tried to be helpful, he really didn't do me too many favors, did he? Someone who comes along and reads this and sees that their doctor didn't educate them either will know to change doctors.

oldbutwise, I am very happy if this thread has encouraged you to want to discuss your medications and/or bipolar illness more with your doctor. I hope that yields positive results.

It took a long while until I finally found a mix that made a real difference. I am generally happy with all meds in my mix and finally understand better what the purposes are of each of them. I know that in some cases, like mine, it was a matter of finally knowing what medications did more harm than good, to avoid mistakes being made again and again. That was significant! I also recognize the value that can be derived from therapy, as an adjunct to medications. Improved insight is priceless.

You identify spending issues as a frequent (or regular) issue for you. Knowing that alone is a clue that can act as a red flag. Self checks, regularly, are important for me. Though hyperspending is not one of my usual red flags, other symptoms are. My therapist reminds me to regularly question myself on my behavior. She and my psychiatrist do, as well, so possible episodes are nipped by the bud sooner than later, before they become "significant". PRN ("as needed") medication also helps to stop my escalating episodes in their tracks.

[Jester's Rags]

Way too many to count. Heck, one would be too many.

Originally Posted by Jester's Rags

Heck, one would be too many.

I totally agree with this statement, Jester's Rags! Though I am heading towards 50, and have had a countless number of episodes since then, my first serious episodes at 15/16 years old affected me in various ways, for my whole life.

[~Christina]

Well .. I cant even think of the number, I went undiagnosed until age 43.. I thought everyone had a racing mind. Growing up I didnt have the internet at my fingertips like everyone does now, Had I wanted to research Bipolar I would have been at the Library and big heavy books that were likely outdated by decades.. Id drag myself into my Doctors office if I was dealing with Depression and he would give me a AD and then boom ( looking back now) I was Hypo !

My husband decided he loved his girlfriend more than me, On the day our divorce was final I took my daughter along to a card dealership and just looked at a row of sporty cars and said Ok Amanda pick whatever color you like, She picked Green.. Less than a year Later I bought a house on a whim, Then was bored with my car about a year later , again I let my daughter pic it out, LOL Green again... the sales man said ,,, " Well dont you want to drive it first?" I said are these cars junk ? he said no, I said then why should I, made perfect sense to me, As long as it hauled azzzz I didnt care

Looking back I have lived alot of my life Hypo/Manic

Bipolar is just so damn much fun

[swimmingly]

I think only 3. In 30 years. That feels so insignificant. I have so much memory loss though, and I wasn't always watching for the symptoms. I'm still learning what it feels like five years after diagnosis. I dunno. I'm discouraged.

Originally Posted by swimmingly

I think only 3. In 30 years. That feels so insignificant. I have so much memory loss though, and I wasn't always watching for the symptoms. I'm still learning what it feels like five years after diagnosis. I dunno. I'm discouraged.

Quantity is just of interest, swimmingly. It definitely doesn't reflect severity or the impact it has had on lives.

I hope your memory loss eases soon. I know in my own case, it has.