Bipolar Questions #6

Yeah, sometimes I feel they’re smarter than and more capable than I am lol. They can remember and do so much!

If you were dropped off in a foreign country, and you knew their language fluently.... but only could communicate using one mode of communication — reading, writing, speaking or listening.... which would you choose to survive being there ?

That would be pretty difficult only having one and not the coordinating one (reading and writing vs. speaking and listening/hearing). I guess I'd probably have to choose writing. At least then I could show some notebook to the person I'm communicating with. They might think I'm deaf and mute, but at least they'd know what I want. The problem would be that if they tried to write a response back, I wouldn't know how to understand it. Quite problematic and they'd be very perplexed.

If you could speak an additional language fluently (above the one(s) you already speak), which one would it be and why?

Mandarin so when we invade China, I will understand.

Circuses?

I avoid them because of animal cruelty. Something like cirque de soliel I'd go for though.

Do you have a birthmark?

Yes on my back which is a bit big and also on my right knee at the side of my knee cap its small though.

Question: How long have you been diagnosed?

Do you remember that appt that told you, you had Bipolar?

Do you remember how you felt?

Yep. IP stay after first mania, w psychosis in July, 2005. Did not know enuf 2 b terrified.

TRIGGER WARNING: DEPRESSION PTSD

Year of ur worst depression? 2008 4 me, lasted 9 mos.

2009- 2010 lasted 6 months. Was not my finest time in life couldn't get out of bed, could eat, could drink, couldn't sleep just lay there crying. Suicidal constantly. Write my first suicide note (not my finest moment I have to say) I regret it further consequences I faced afterwards. I lost my friends and job ultimately for it.

Question: Have you had a BBQ this year?

At least one. The one I remember was to grill homemade Kafta (Kofta) Kabobs along with some grilled veggies. I love Kafta Kabob! We only have a charcoal grill.

What outdoor smells do you like most?

Autumn leaves, some flowers and the smell of the air after a good rain.

Do you like streetcart food?

I tend to leave them alone.

growing up, I was always told that they probably arn't the best environments for preparing food, and you could get ill. that said: I have had some burgers from such places and been fine, not as good as a cafe though- no where near.

do you go to a fireworks event/ do them yourself on july 4th?

No. I do hear a lot that my neighbors do, usually for about a week before and after. It gets old but is the price you pay for living in the country.

Do you collect anything?

now that's what I call music cds.

in the UK, we're up to volume 106, and I have them from 26 so quite a few (but I still need to find the earlier ones). I love the chart music

question: when was the last time you felt judged?. what happened

I think I have what I call a judgement complex. I'm always thinking other can tell that I'm mentally ill, and are judging me. Not much happens because most of the time I avoid a conflict. I'm pretty much an amiable person and will swallow the hurt feeling and move on.

Are you more likely to walk towards or away from a conflict? It could be one involving you personally (a real or perceived) or something else.

I very much dislike conflict, but I will occasionally walk towards it if I feel it is for the best, in some way. Sometimes I am proved wrong, though. I think that one positive attribute of mine is that I am pretty good about making peace after conflicts. Often I am the one that apologizes even if another person is partly or fully at fault. I think most people will come to a truce or let bygones be bygones, but others have a more stubborn way and hold permanent grudges. That's sad for me, but in a way even sadder for them.

Q: What is something you wish you said to someone, but didn't?

I love you to a friend but I didn't and they left my life and I feel guilty for being shy

Question: In what ways does being Hypo-manic show in you?

Early on I get fidgety and my pdoc says I am very giggley with her although my therapist (who sees me the same day) doesn't see that. When it gets worse it goes into a mixed episode pretty quickly.

What was the most boring class you took in school (at any level, grade through graduate/professional)

I remember studying the book, " of mice and men"

not only is that the worse class ever, but the book is....... nooo. I don't like it is an understatement. I'd rather read shakespeare

so you're aproaced by the head of a tv network and are asked to come up with the next big tv hit. what's your response?

No clue (I don’t watch much tv)

Favourite band?

Armani.

What animal is the scariest?

Humans

Do you get talked over a lot?

I used to when I was working. Now I don't talk to people much who aren't used to my talking speed.

Do you find it hard to say I love you?

when I say it, it means something diffrent to me.

rather than: I love you as a person, to me it usually means, I loved the time we spent together, and thanks for listening to me

I've never said it though in a relationship sort of way

have you read lord of the rings?

Yes, but I don't remember much of it. I call one of the voices I hear "gollum" though. Unlike in the books he's nice, but too protective.

Do you like photoshopping your pictures?

No. I've never done it.

Sunrise or sunset?

sunset.

have you ever complained to someone who works in a shop, cafe, hotel, etc etc- what happened