[bizi]

I am 7 pounds from my highest weight.
I am 195 right now. UGH!

I must do something about this.
Drinking alcohol is my downfall.

I had less then 2 beers after work at fat pats
and will try to limit it to that. and not
have hubby make me gin and tonics.
I have been having heart burn pretty

bad every night. truly lemonades,

sour beers I just can't drink those any more.

So I am crossing my fingers tonight

and will tell jeff my hubby that that is

what I want to do.
NO GIN AND TONICS!!!!!

I was manic about 10 years a go. And got down

to 122, I am 5 ' 7 "
thinking that I was going to try to get to 120.
5 years ago I was 135.
and I looked great bought smaller scrubs

felt great then I crashed after falling down

some brick stairs almost crushed the small

child that I had picked up. I turned to the side to protect her and broke my collar bone when I landed.....

[bizi]

I drank so much yesterday.
My tdoc canceled on my 9am visit so I went back
to bed was hung over and needed to get some
more sleep and set the alarm wrong and jeff

came looking for me and found me in bed, told

me the time and I was horrified. jumped up and
ran a comb thru my hair and ran out the door,

no face washed no brushed my teeth
no no no taking care of my self.
So decided to not drink, did not stop at

fat pats like usual. came home and jeff

said the chicken thighs we could cook for
dinner but I felt that they were still partially

frozen. So we went to chipotle and had good food.
came home started on billing. and got 20 bills done.

That was enough. I only had a few days left to bill.

they can wait a while.
Day 1 of not drinking, after drinking for so many days. I finally have a day one.
geesh
bizi

[buddha1too]

This issue has been going on for a long time now. I'm no big fan of rehab, but it helps a lot of people. You've tried quitting on your own before and could only manage a few months. Some people can't quit without some kind of help. Just a thought. I hope you can give the drinking a rest.

[bizi]

I had a streak 5 1/2 months a couple of years ago.

then I drank9 beers.
Have had a 30 af days in a row, but this year was t
he first when I did not give up alcohol for lent.
I went in patient for 30 days due to mania and and psychosis.
and was af when released to IOP for 5 weeks.
I am lonely, have few friends, mostly quintessences.
I stop buy fat pats to socialize amongst the bartenders
and to get work done answer phone calls. I will try to stay away from fat pats and not buy any beer.
my weight is up to 193 this morning. need to get
back to AF to lose weight.
sigh
bizi