Delay memory.

Hey guyz!!

Unfortunately , the bad things I've lived thru, stick with me like glue.
Every night I tell myself an invented story so I can sleep.
Having a good memory is a beotch at my age.
I have lived too long. Too many bad memories.
I have "favorites" too. Like 10 that try to derail my story every night.

I've learned to live with that, but now it's something different.
I was excellent with names, people, faces, happenings, birthdays, etc.

Now I eventually remember after a while. Specially actor's names, athletes, game scores and so on. But it takes a while.
I blame the lamotrigine. It has always made me dumb. But dumb is one thing, and forgetting my kids birthdays is another. And remembering next day or late at night.

I need a name for this. Like stupiditis acute. Maybe ii is a condition and I don't know the name. Alzheimer is the opposite. I wish I had "some" heimer.

Is this the prelude to not remembering anything?. Like in Mr heimer?
Or I need more CBD.
If anybody has gone thru the same condition, and wants to help me, don't be bashful.
I need to find a solution.
Thank you for reading.
Cheers.

@pirilin I have had experiences where my memory has not been so good when I experienced depression. I also read that depression does actually inhibit memory. I think it comes with the challenge of depression.

My recall for things like names etc has always been bad so I can’t blame meds. I keep a Notes section on my iPhone for reminders / grocery lists etc otherwise I’d never remember!

Sorry I don't have a solution. But at age 74, addicted to Clonazepam, after having tried a half dozen or so antidepressants over the years, I certainly can relate to this. I simply find I have to write things down in order to remember them.

I'm also flooded constantly with bad memories. When you've lived to be my age and have struggled with mental health issues for as long as I have, you've had more than enough time to collect a whole bunch of bad memories. (Actually, when I try to think up some good memories, I either find I can't think of any, or the occasional good memory I do think up segues directly into another bad memory. It's a vicious circle.)

I don't know how old you are. I suppose what you're experiencing could be the initial stages of some variety of dementia. But my personal, non-professional opinion is that it's more likely to be the effects of medications you may have taken over the years, depression and anxiety along with, perhaps, just a wee bit of the natural effects of becoming just a bit older. Everyone, or at least most people I think, experience some natural decline in memory as the years go by. That doesn't mean they have dementia.

Hey Buddy

No advice to add but just wanted to give you a Big

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Like Skeezyks, I am physically addicted to Klonopin after having taken it for about 30 years (I'm 60 years old). I am absolutely sure that Klonopin and other psych meds have caused memory impairment. Holding on to new information is practically impossible unless I write it down immediately.

So far, I remember old information. My childhood phone number was ###-####. My childhood zip code, I recall with no problem.

Unfortunately, I am also haunted by bad memories. The loss and grief memories. On repeat. The knowledge that only more loss and grief will come.

Yet, strange as it sounds, I don't want to die. I like meeting people (IRL or online) and giving relationship a chance.

I recall something Farrah Fawcett said when she was lying in her hospital bed, close to death. She said, "I will miss the rain."

I'm 73 now. That could be part of the problem.
But it has gotten worse in the last year.
I'm like living in my own world. I hear, but I don't listen.
I'll keep digging until I find the cause. If ever.
Be safe.
Cheers.

Quote:

Originally Posted by pirilin I'm 73 now. That could be part of the problem. But it has gotten worse in the last year. I'm like living in my own world. I hear, but I don't listen. I'll keep digging until I find the cause. If ever. Be safe. Cheers.

My husband turned 76 two days ago. He could have written your post. He says that when he turned 75 he retreated into his own world. He remembers very little of his life, he says. He does not have dementia, he is in excellent health, is physically fit, and does not take any type of medication. He is a spiritual person and has a strong belief in God.

I think what you've described is a natural stage of life. If I gave it a name I would call it "floating."