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Wanderer of Distant Stars
Member Since May 2012
Location: North Carolina, USA. Originally New York
Posts: 25,670
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12 13k hugs
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#381
I am just in a state of disarray. I wish my sister's husband wasn't such a controlling a-hole, seriously. This tropical storm Debby is expected to turn into a hurricane by tomorrow and is headed right in my sister's direction. But she has me blocked so I can't even check on her. I really hate this. Just beside myself right now.
The hurricane is expected to head in this direction after its done with Florida too - I get so nervous with power outages because I live alone : ( Just bought a fancy back up battery that my best friend recommended so I think I should be okay - I needed one anyway this hurricane season. Hope everyone is doing well and staying safe. You know we worry @MuddyBoots - we just worry cause we care. ![]() __________________ Tales of Love, Motivation, and An Interesting Journey - Please Subscribe to my Website on WordPress: Inspired Odyssey's Path to Wellness and Love |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 37,934
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8 9,380 hugs
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#382
I probably should get my hematrcrit checked out. I am so crabby and I'm dealing with urinary retention right now and I drank 2 Dr. Peppers and some water. And thats a whole lot worse then constipation.
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Poohbah
Member Since May 2018
Location: Toronto, Canada
Posts: 1,310
6 84 hugs
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#383
I had a stressful couple of days. I'll spare you the details.
Maybe tomorrow will be better. The good news: I had a nice vegetarian meal while overlooking Niagara Falls on a beautiful, sunny day with my family. __________________ * Dx: Unspecified Bipolar and Related Disorder * Rx: Remeron, Prozac, Klonopin My avatar picture is a photo of the Whirlpool Galaxy I took in April 2023. I dedicated this photo to my sister who passed away in July 2016. |
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Member
Member Since Feb 2023
Location: Ontario; long-time member, just under other names
Posts: 444
1 3,127 hugs
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#385
I had a quiet day. It wasn't too hot out so i got out to the dog park. It was fine in the shade. There was a delightful puppy there, a poodle mix, just a silly, goofy, lovely little thing. I dozed the day away and only really woke up this evening. I got some minor chores done. Feelings of shame over outrageous things i did while hypomanic attacked me several times today. I worry that i am wasting my life, being a recluse, but what's the alternative? Take anti-depressants and get hypomanic and shame myself and spend my retirement savings? It seems like there's no good option.
@June08: Thanks for the suggestion of "Dry Bar." I had a quick look and will have a more serious look when i'm more in the mood. @Scooter9: Sorry you had some troubles but your meal, overlooking Niagara, sounds divine. I find it's a great feeling being vegetarian, i so enjoy it, tho i do occasionally screw up. @LadyShadow: I'll keep a good thought for you, while you are threatened by the hurricane. I hope you will be safe and comfortable. @Blueberrybook: H@pPy @nNiVeRs@Ry! Hugs to all! ![]() Last edited by JaneOnceMore; Aug 04, 2024 at 10:59 PM.. |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 37,934
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8 9,380 hugs
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#386
I'm feeling really guilty about stuff that doesn't make a whole lot of sense. I just said no when they asked if I wanted something substitued and I feel like I should have said "no, thanks." Also my cat was hard to get into the carrier and I feek bad for him even though he is being so affectionate. Like I feel like crying right now for some reason. I haven't cride in over a year. And I am soooo itchy I can't sit still because I'm scratching everywere. And it took me 3 hours to pee because of urinary retention. And I've been so cranky. Wtf is going on.
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 37,934
(SuperPoster!)
8 9,380 hugs
given ![]() |
#387
I drank my 5th or 6th zero sugar Dr. Pepper in the past 24 hours because I'm thirsty as **** too. And my meds kicked in. So now I'm just dealing with the itching which I'm not in freak out mode about right now.
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Member
Member Since Jun 2024
Location: Washington
Posts: 158
234 hugs
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#388
Quote:
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Member
Member Since Jun 2024
Location: Washington
Posts: 158
234 hugs
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#389
Quote:
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Silver Swan
Member Since Jan 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 16,793
(SuperPoster!)
16 2,605 hugs
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#390
@Crazy Hitch
Quote:
__________________ Ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 1.5 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) Mania (April/May 2019) Last edited by Moose72; Aug 05, 2024 at 07:45 AM.. |
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: La Porte, TX
Posts: 3,558
6 231 hugs
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#391
@Lady Shadow
I definitely understand your trepidation about hurricanes, they happen here more than I'd like. I just went thru Beryl and some people had a week without power! Luckily, I had just 24 hr. without electricity, but I still lost most of the food in my fridge except the uncut fruits & vegetables. Stay safe. I'm thinking of you ![]() In fact, I'm thinking of everyone here. @MuddyBoots Take care of yourself ![]() I took a rest day from exercise today. My body is exhausted & I need it. Though I feel guilty about it ![]() Yesterday evening was nice. We ate at a seafood restaurant. For all that my family are picky eaters, we all enjoy seafood though I rarely cook it. Afterwards, since we were on the boardwalk, we stopped at the aquarium, looked around, fed & touched the stingrays, then walked along the bay at sunset. It was a really nice evening out with my family. My mood is good. Stable. I slept 8.5 hr. last night, was pretty tired. Stability seems boring, but on the other hand, I def. do not want to be depressed, and my last round of mania sucked too, so stability is pretty much my best bet. Plus, I love books & reading, and I only read well when I'm stable. HUGS to everyone else! I hope you have a fantastic Monday! ![]() ![]() __________________ Bipolar 1, PTSD, anorexia, panic disorder, ADHD Seroquel, Cymbalta, propanolol, buspirone, Trazodone, gabapentin, lamotrigine, hydroxyzine, There's a crack in everything. That is how the light gets in. --Leonard Cohen |
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Member
Member Since Jun 2024
Location: Washington
Posts: 158
234 hugs
given |
#392
Quote:
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Silver Swan
Member Since Jan 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 16,793
(SuperPoster!)
16 2,605 hugs
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#393
Quote:
__________________ Ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 1.5 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) Mania (April/May 2019) |
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Member
Member Since Jun 2024
Location: Washington
Posts: 158
234 hugs
given |
#394
I woke up and can't get back to sleep. I have to be up in 2 and a half hours for my wound care appointment.
I'm proud of my son. He realized that he can't drink a lot of coffee because then he can't sleep. He was in a pretty good mood yesterday. My bipolar is ok. I take medical transportation to my would care appointments. I get too anxious driving in that area. It's where all of our big hospitals are. It's right on the hill . So I'm a horrible passenger drivert. I just look out the windows. I hate it! |
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Silver Swan
Member Since Jan 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 16,793
(SuperPoster!)
16 2,605 hugs
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#395
See my Pdoc and tdoc today. I’m looking forward to both! Had a long text conversation with Robert about that crazy 26 year old at starbucks and about how I’m an extrovert and he’s a recluse. At least I’m relatively stable and didn’t get caught up in that lady’s weirdness- especially not letting her come over after she invited herself!
__________________ Ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 1.5 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) Mania (April/May 2019) |
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Monster on the Hill
Member Since Sep 2020
Location: by the river
Posts: 5,152
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3 5,850 hugs
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#396
I cancelled seeing my CM today. I hate all of them. They're holding me back. I left a message, of course she called back IMMEDIATELY and I told her the truth. And someone at the shelter I used to be at of course called and wants me to come by "because I got some mail there" but I know it's a trap. I gave her my CMs info. No way do I blow off my CM and that lady tries to lure me in. I have more important things to do. Equations to figure out. Explain that dots are infinite but a lot of people only realize some and connect even less. I don't know if anyone else has access to this ability either, but I know I can get dots in other dimensions. At least the fourth, and the complex plane. All I had to do was calculate the sqrt of i I mean sqrt of sqrt of -1. I keep doing this over and over like in detention when you have to write "I will not sit at the peanut free table with a PB&J [or whatever]" a million times.
If you believe it's in my soul I'd say all the words that I know Just to see if it would show That I'm trying to let you know That I'm better off on my own I'm waiting on a text or call from my mom. Bo's not well, and she's officially the owner so she's the one to call the vet. I saw Lu the other night protecting me, and she probably convinced my mom to get him looked at. Her death was pretty quick and probably feels bad for Bo. My CM said she'll call later today too. Probably try to convince me to go back to the shelter for the trap or for me to meet her. It's really fking hard for me to not flip out over everything. I freaked yesterday because I heard footsteps, and this dude, probably not even 18, rode by on one of those stupid fking electric bikes and catcalled me. I screamed at the top of my lungs something not so nice. Like, something my dad would've said. I see the protons gaining more charge. It always has a +1 charge, but that +1 now is probably equivalent to what used to be +1.3 if my vision and estimate is accurate. If I had a dial caliper that small that could be accurate I'd get a solid calculation, but that doesn't exist and I don't have access to a fancy lab that can do that shyt. Maybe I'll email a couple universities with a top notch experimental physics department. Ok. Getting tf out. I know I've been less than supportive lately of y'all but I do care and I hope you are doing well. From what I do read there's a lot of life going on and stressors. My aunt got hit by Debbie (still there) in Ocala and she had over 7" of rain. She says she'll still take it over NH winters though ![]() love you guys ![]() __________________ [Insert thought-provoking and comedic quote here] |
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Wanderer of Distant Stars
Member Since May 2012
Location: North Carolina, USA. Originally New York
Posts: 25,670
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12 13k hugs
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#397
Well Hurricane Debby is hitting Florida right now right over my sister's area. My prayers are with her even though I am not allowed to reach out to her : (
Slept pretty good too, woke up in the middle of the night because I think there might be something wrong with my CPAP machine; it's pushing air very forcefully after a certain number of hours, it's like a wind tunnel in there lol. I will have to check the settings tonight. Going to get some work done today and not worry too much about the hurricane. For some reason bad weather ALWAYS seems to hit when I have to do this hour-long drive into Raleigh for work. Like why does it ALWAYS happen on the day I have to go in? It's really bothering me now. I am sorry you feel that way @JaneOnceMore - I wish you could do some things to make you feel less like a recluse without taking antidepressants - I worry so much about being pushed into hypomania too because of med changes or additions, so I totally get where you're coming from. ![]() That sounds so crazy @Moose72 - I mean that's so odd that she just came up to your table and got so personal and "in your face" almost - you are right to be cautious and suspicious, I would be too. I worry about you my friend, @MuddyBoots - all those calculations sound like where I was at a couple of years ago when I used to record all types of numbers and theories at exactly 11:11 and 2:22 and send the transmissions to the NASA space station. It was THAT bad. So, I know it's crazy mania, and I worry for you. ![]() I hope everyone has a fantastic day today and remember that whatever you're going through I am very proud of you for always checking in here and letting us know how you are doing. I love this accountability thread so much and I don't know where I would be without all your love and support. ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() __________________ Tales of Love, Motivation, and An Interesting Journey - Please Subscribe to my Website on WordPress: Inspired Odyssey's Path to Wellness and Love |
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Legendary
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: usa
Posts: 11,439
19 2,776 hugs
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#398
MD if you have a rash on lamictal you need to see a dr asap. it can be dangerous. it could be a simple rash or SJS.
__________________ schizoaffective bipolar type PTSD generalized anxiety celexa, prazosin, risperdal and prn klonopin and helpful cogentin |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2013
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 37,161
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11 14.7k hugs
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#399
I had a good volunteer shift with the rescue kitties yesterday. They’re all so sweet and friendly.
__________________ “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 37,934
(SuperPoster!)
8 9,380 hugs
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#400
I don't think its a rash anymore. I'm just really itchy. I'm also really cold too and in general pretty worn out and tired. I think it could be the hematrcrit. I'll message my doctor.
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