Bipolar Check-in #82

Seeing pdoc on Wednesday. Taking the day off work. Takes 1.5 hours to get there. Appointment is at midday. When I saw him 3 weeks ago he said he wants me to have time off work. Now that my workers comp is through, I can. Will ask him on Wednesday if he still thinks I need time off.

So Victoria has decided to go back on medication after a frightening and embarrassing night with. Psychosis. Her friend's noticed. She wants me to go with her to her appointment. She was supposed to make an appointment earlier and she never did. She says she's tired of fighting with her Drs.

I woke up at 6:30 and I decided to take a shower. Then I opened all the curtains and went into the living room to watch the news. I'm going to wash my comforter and blankets today. This is my 3rd shower this week. I'm really improving with it. I also got my laundry done yesterday and I really limited my news. I had that weird stuff last night but I feel a lot better today. I just need to keep pushing myself more.

@Victoria'smom
Glad your daughter has decided to go back on medication. I hope it helps her.

@raspberrytorte and @BeyondtheRainbow I hope you are both feeling better soon and that hopefully you can see a doctor and get something to help you recover.

@June08
Sorry about your depression. Are you just taking the birth control for your bipolar or for your periods too? If it's causing you depression and you don't need it for your cycle, is it something to consider getting off of? It sounds like you've really been struggling with depression lately. When do you see your pdoc next?

@Blue_Bird
Did the movie help any with your dissociation? I have it a lot, most days I think but some days it's worse than others. Today I even lost time with it which is disconcerting, but it was only a few minutes. I was boiling eggs and looked at the timer, it had 3 min. left. I went to sit down and drink some coffee I'd already made and next thing I know the egg timer was going off and it felt like I'd only just sat down and had a sip of my coffee like it had been 3 sec and not 3 min. It happened while jogging too but that was more like being outside of myself (watching a movie I guess is how it's often put), not really feeling the jogging on my body, just automatically doing it not so much losing time.

I've had a pretty productive morning so far - exercised, showered, refilled meds, had breakfast, put away a grocery delivery, started a load of laundry. I'm so glad to have groceries restocked, especially my fresh fruits and vegetables. We go through a lot of fresh produce in a week.

My mood is pretty level and calm right now, anxiety is low so all is good on that front. I'm not so wound up this morning as I have been the past few mornings.

Hope everyone has a fanastic Sunday!

Caleb left after breakfast. He’s probably home by now. I’m laying on the couch waiting for N1 to text me back. Today is her day off and she probably wants to sleep in.,,I haven’t seen her in a while and thought we could go out for coffee.

@Blueberrybook yeah the movie helped with the dissociation. It was a good distraction and by time it finished I was so tired from my night meds I laid down and fell asleep almost instantly. I watched Lightyear which is the Buzz Lightyear Disney Pixar movie

Good afternoon friends. I woke up super early, around 5am then fell back asleep at 6am to 10:45am. I slept good. Has really weird dreams. Right now I’m enjoying my “morning” even though it’s technically 12pm so it’s really afternoon. But I’m still in my waking up phase and am just drinking some black tea and watching Supernatural. I’m gonna read for awhile while my phone charges.

I’m so ready for fall. I love everything about it. The cooler weather, the changing leaves, pumpkins, pumpkin spice everything, apple cider , all the fall treats, being able to wear long sleeves and sweatshirts , rainy days, Halloween. Spending time at a cafe reading with a coffee and treat while looking out the window at the pretty leaves. Baking desserts, pies etc. Coffee is best in the fall!

Anyway, yeah really looking forward to it. I also got a book recently called The Pumpkin Spice Cafe that I’m really looking forward to reading.

I have to practice violin later tonight then I need to record 5 Christmas ukulele songs for my 30 christmas song ukulele challenge. Those are my main goals for today.

Good morning 😃

I had a wonderful sleep. Filled with dreams. It’s sort of a reoccurring dream. Not totally the same but I’m in a trendy part of and old city and the bus service is terrible. This time it was an elite tennis match and all the restaurants and food venders were foreign and the food was all new to me and menus were in Arabic or mandarin. By the time I got up the nerve to try and order all the food had been put away. Then I was in city hall trying to get better bus service to that area. No idea what it means! But it was interesting and novel that I could dream of foreign languages.

Last night I made the jello salad but had to throw the strawberries away as there were two completely spoiled ones that affected the whole bunch. But it should be fine without the strawberries. I have the pot luck at 5 today. It’s always interesting. It depends on where I sit. Usually the usual gang of us play games after.

omgi slept from 1 am to 10 am without the sleep aid. im sooo tired. whats wrong with me??

im crashing. down and down. so sleepy

@HALLIEBETH87 you needed the sleep.
bizi

I heard about The New Yorker magazine a long time ago and kind of ignored it because I thought it was focused on New York.

Boy was I wrong! I just subscribed and found 2 books that I'm going to try to read. They're not new books but they sound interesting.

I'm feeling really low. I'm not engaged in my hobby - I just can't get into it.

I can see the rut in the road and am circling it, trying to avoid getting stuck in it.

I'm washing my blankets and they came out of the washing maching sopping wet. I put them in the dryer anyways and even after an 1 hour and 20 minutes on high they are still completely wet. So they went in for another 1 hour and 20 minutes on high. My sister and bil and the kids are coming over in a bit to celebrate my brothers birthday. They invited themselves over and my mom is fixing dinner and the cake. Kinda rude tbh. I know they are pretty much hoaders but at least bring dinner.

Monday morning. Ughhhhhhh. At least I have Wednesday off to see pdoc.

I hit my reading goal for 2024. I challenged myself to read 45 books this year and I just hit that number! And am still gonna keep going of course

Good job! My goal is to make it out to breakfast evetually.

Thanks and thats a great goal to have!

My therapy appointment is tomorrow morning at 11am. We’re starting the EMDR therapy tomorrow. Idk what to expect from it really but we’ll see how it goes. Does anyone here have any experience with EMDR for trauma?

It can be hard. Stay the
Course. Han gin there.

You’re worth it!