Bipolar Check-in #82

MuddyBoots · Yesterday at 04:06 PM

@raspberrytorte I'm all for not going to the hospital and avoiding doctors as much as possible, but I really really really think you should go to the ER. That is a lot of valium/diazepam. You say it's not lethal, and in my experience with benzo overdoses of similar equivalency, yeah, I'm alive, but it was NOT FUN when that left my body. And then there's the fact you are in the headspace you did that in the first place, and the phrasing "dye freak out" is just further sign that you're more impulsive. I don't want to see you get hurt or suffer needlessly. You can do what you want, of course, but if I were sitting next to you I would be begging to take you to the ER.

I want to say throughout the day I check for activity on this forum logged out from my phone and only log in and post outside of "normal MSF time" if there's something that looks really important or I'm doing a freak out, and this is one of those "looks really important" moments that had me logging in real quick.

Nammu · Yesterday at 04:48 PM

Yes raspberry, I agree with muddy. You are not safe. You take a lot of meds and the can interact with a nonlethal dose to be harmful. Go to the ER. At this point you need the professionals

raspberrytorte · Yesterday at 05:25 PM

Don't worry you guys. I'm okay. (Well, as okay as I can be I guess.) I don't need to go to the hospital. I always suffer through med withdrawals whenever I go to the hospital, which won't help me. I always get some asshat IP doctor who takes me off my benzo.... or last time it was gabapentin. Doesn't help my anxiety at all. Nope.

I took my nap. Dyeing my hair in about half an hour.

I'm not taking anymore diazepam anyway because I don't want to run out early. I've been through benzo withdrawal and it was the worst experience of my life, and all of my other meds are locked up.

Mountaindewed · Yesterday at 05:34 PM

Possible trigger:

I took a Geodon 80 at 1AM, an 80 at 8AM, and an 80 at 5PM. And three 5mg valium between 6-7 a 4th one at 8AM and a 5th one at 4:30

I doubt any of that is that big of a deal. I just know now not to drink half a carton of iced coffee

Moose72 · Yesterday at 06:03 PM

I’m on the couch with a song on a cd on infinite repeat. Cat is sleeping wrapped around the arm of the couch. Had chicken wings I made in the air fryer for dinner. My friends are ignoring me. I hate when they do that!

HALLIEBETH87 · Yesterday at 06:09 PM

Saw the immediate care psych np. He gave me haldol. Called me in one zyprexa last night so I could sleep. It worked. He was super nice. If it wasn’t $140 each time bc they don’t take insurance I’d keep seeing him

Scooter9 · Yesterday at 09:14 PM

I found a really interesting article from the New York Times, published in 2010, called The Americanization of Mental Illness.

The article discusses mental health in terms of the suffer's culture. Although it discusses schizophrenia and anorexia, it's applicable to mental illness in general.

What is really interesting is the result of a study that evaluated how people treat those with mental illness that resulted either from their environment or biology - the result is surprising.

I think this article is good because it challenges how we think about and treat mental health. It also encourages empathy.

The article appeared in the NYT but I found a link to a PDF copy.

https://nevillepark.ca/wp-content/up...ytimes-com.pdf

BeyondtheRainbow · 10:29 PM

We have a family reunion going on this weekend. Part of it is some people coming back to visit a community fair they grew up attending and some people are just here to see those people. But it is a LOT of people in our quiet lifestyle here. It's so nice to see everyone but it is so loud. My head noise is back in force. I didn't realize that part of that was static but after listening to people talk loudly for hours I have a staticky head and know that was my
usual before adding Seroquel. Tomorrow will be 10 of us in one house so that should get really loud. I'll take some PRN Seroquel with me. I should have today. But it is really nice to see people. I'm just tired.

I'm going to have to make my poor cat move so I can get something to eat. She's so cozy but I'm so hungry. Who will win?

ETA: It was a tie. I moved my leg and little and she jumped down. I love it when there isn't any guilt.

Crazy Hitch · Yesterday at 09:27 PM

Today is the football grand finals and I’m going to drink a little bit. I don’t drink often so I’ll have to be careful! Just one or 2. My partner is doing a bbq so that’s nice 🙂

June08 · Yesterday at 09:31 PM

I'm so glad it's the weekend, mainly because it means I'm that much closer to seeing my counselor and pdoc next week. Although, I'm nervous to tell them (especially my counselor) just how much I've been struggling. Especially my counselor because I haven't seen her very long so don't know how she responds when someone mentions SI thoughts. The thoughts are still there, but not as intensely as they have been.

Since I have so much work to do this weekend, at some point tomorrow or Sunday I'm going to go to a coffee shop to work on things.

TW: appetite/food/weight talk

Possible trigger:

I had zero appetite this evening but new I needed to eat something so went to the gas station to get a protein shake and a couple of small things. I'm noticing some temptations for disordered eating, which I get from time to time, so am just monitoring so I don't accidentally start losing to much weight. The depression has me not wanting to eat though.

Victoria'smom · Yesterday at 10:47 PM

I swear I wrote. Everything is still ****ed it's just now I'm agitated and now can't sleep. Kids still here maybe for another week.

Mountaindewed · Today at 04:33 AM

I slept 9 hours and it felt great. I woke up at 8 with a mucusy cough because some stuff had gone down the wrong way earlier in the day. The med makes me tired but it does get rid of the cough. I can't help feeling like my seasonal depression is starting up. I know my therapist told me on Thursday that I am depressed. But I feel it more then normal.

Ok. So I am depressed and lacking energy and I can't get out of bed most days but idk what to do about it.

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Bipolar Check-in #82

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Mountaindewed Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jun 2016 Location: Where the sidewalk ends Posts: 38,202 (SuperPoster!) 8 9,477 hugs given	Yesterday at 05:34 PM #784 Possible trigger: I took a Geodon 80 at 1AM, an 80 at 8AM, and an 80 at 5PM. And three 5mg valium between 6-7 a 4th one at 8AM and a 5th one at 4:30 I doubt any of that is that big of a deal. I just know now not to drink half a carton of iced coffee __________________ I'm Blue
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HALLIEBETH87 Legendary Member Since Oct 2004 Location: usa Posts: 11,500 19 2,796 hugs given	Yesterday at 06:09 PM #786 Saw the immediate care psych np. He gave me haldol. Called me in one zyprexa last night so I could sleep. It worked. He was super nice. If it wasn’t $140 each time bc they don’t take insurance I’d keep seeing him __________________ schizoaffective bipolar type PTSD generalized anxiety celexa, prazosin, risperdal and prn klonopin and helpful cogentin
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Crazy Hitch ɘvlovƎ Member Since Nov 2013 Location: Australia Posts: 18,788 (SuperPoster!) 10 13.8k hugs given	Yesterday at 09:27 PM #789 Today is the football grand finals and I’m going to drink a little bit. I don’t drink often so I’ll have to be careful! Just one or 2. My partner is doing a bbq so that’s nice 🙂
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Victoria'smom Legendary Member Since Apr 2012 Location: Earth Posts: 15,040 (SuperPoster!) 12 5,531 hugs given	Yesterday at 10:47 PM #791 I swear I wrote. Everything is still **ed it's just now I'm agitated and now can't sleep. Kids still here maybe for another week. __________________ Dx: Me- SzA** Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog
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