I’m so depressed!

Had therapy today. Tough. All that’s happened in the last two weeks!

I'm happy you and Caleb made up, Moose! ❤️

Me too! We talked for an hour tonight on the phone.

My allergist wrote me this today…

Reactions to dye's are very rare. We do not have testing for many dyes. Have you had reactions to red dyes in the past? I would avoid purple gatorade. We could potentially test for one type of red dye during your follow up visit however this dye is Red #4 and not the Red #40 which is in Gatorade. Another possibility is that you are not reactions to any food or medications specifically but this represents a more internal process. We could discuss more at the follow up but for now would just avoid whateverr you consumed before the symptoms which in this case would be the purple gatorade.

I sent him back a clip from a webpage on blue 1 dye allergies and it’s symptoms.

Potential Blue 1 Side Effects
Some studies suggest that Brilliant Blue FCF and Blue 2 may contribute to toxic effects. Symptoms of an allergic reaction due to Blue 1 or other food dyes may include:

Hives
Rashes
Itchy skin
Chest tightness
Flushing
Difficulty breathing
Severe headaches
Facial swelling
While most food dye allergic reactions are mild, some can become severe when not addressed.

Geez, i love how these docs graduated from the Bazooka Joe school of medicine: (or groucho marx)

Hey doc, my arm hurts when i do this.
Then dont do it.

The Benadryl has worn off and here I am awake at 1:15 am. I can’t wait to see my Pdoc on the 23rd! Still seems so far away. But I do get to see my T on wednesdays now so that’s good! I think we’re making headway!

Can’t sleep but I’m exhausted!

Right there with you tonight! I don't know what my problem is.

Me either! Cat is right next to me. Listening to Christmas songs.

I have my cat on my leg. She always tries to help. I think one more dose of PRN (in about 30 minutes) will work. I'm finally feeling a bit tired anyway. Hope you get to sleep soon!

I have no prns!

The allergist sent me a copy of my allergy arm prick test from two months ago. Everything was negative for anaphylaxis! They tested a ton of seafood, several kinds of fish etc! So I may still have an oral aversion to these foods- tingling in my mouth- if I'm brave enough I may try one! N3’s theory is I have a dry mouth from my meds so that's why I react to vinegar and seafood. All foods I haven't eaten in 20 years because I thought I was allergic!

Still going to meet with the allergist about the blue food dye\purple Gatorade in February and thus far I have only restarted the Vraylar and I'm waiting to restart the Gabapentin until my psych nurse practitioner says it's ok on the 23rd. Didn't sleep well last night. Tried to nap but the phone rang and woke me up. But if the Gabapentin is ok this means I don't have to do electroconvulsive therapy!

All good news!

Can’t sleep. Body hurts. Nauseated!

Talked with on call nurse who talked with the on call Pdoc who said I’ve been through a lot! And to go back on the gabapentin but 100 not 200 for now. That should help me sleep. She said blue dye is in so many foods- even marshmallows! Gotta read the labels very carefully from now on.

My mother hates me again

Why does your mom hate you, moose?

Because she gave me toilet paper and I used it too fast for her liking.

Picked up my meds today. Got a lot of Gabapentin left so that’s not in the blister packs. See my therapist tomorrow. Got lots to say!

Now she gave me two packages! Go figure!

Fwb was over tonight. He made a point to tell me I need to clean my toilet! He said he knows how it is to be depressed. I have been depressed and injured and dealing with a severe mystery allergy for two weeks and exhausted so I sleep a lot. I did clean some the other day. Today I cleaned out the cat box. I don’t think it was very nice of him to criticize my apartment. His is a disaster too. Or it used to be when I’d go over there.