[RelientK]

In some post or another I stated that I was symptom free since December 2007. You know, I guess that wasn't entirely true.

I think quite a bit about death and dying. I am afraid to die. I think about my death day. I think about how I will die. I think about my loved ones. Rinse and repeat. I wouldn't say it is to the point of obsession or that it holds me back, but it is bothersome. It never happened until the Bipolar.

[MyBestKids2]

Oh, I do know about the repetitive thoughts. Mine aren't of my death, but others extremely near and dear to me. I find it helpful (just a bit) to put a walkman with headphones on, playing a very loud and jumping sort of song. It helps for the moment if nothing else. I've tried lying down and thinking of a safe and peaceful place, but that rarely works. I hope someone else can maybe help us with this dilemma

(((RelientK)))

[Schatje]

I understand where you are coming from. I get those thoughts of death that run through my head to the point where I can't sleep at night. I'm relatively symptom free myself, but too much stress and I have mini freak-outs that last an hour or less. I don't know if there is a word for what you are experiencing, but I like to call mine bleed throughs. There are still times where the bipolar symptoms bleed through the meds. Anyway, I find that during the day it isn't bad as long as I keep myself busy to try and block out the repetitive thoughts or occupy my mind with something, even if it is just making up a little story or daydreaming about something I enjoy. For me distraction is the key.

[Lenny]

Facing our own mortality is difficult. Imagining the death of a loved one is too...Dealing with the reality of their loss is grief.

But always it is the fear of the unknown. What happens?..Is it really over?

For me,,,I have come to a satisfying understanding of this uncomfortable fear. Somehow through my experiences I have found myself able to sit quietly with Death and see it's limitations...

It has some...

For me,,,I have no concept of having missed any of the past. Somehow I have a feeling that I have been with it,,,the past I mean,,in some way shape or another. Though I'm oblivious to many of the infinite details of it,,,I am somehow familiar with it,,,,beyond the dates and times in History books.

I just don''t seem to feel as though I've missed anything. I can't define this sense of acceptance...but as I learn more about all that has gone on and by,,,I feel some comradship to it all...maybe it is the stardust in me...it knows from where it came...

And that is how I see the future too....

Somehow I will be part of it..in some way shape or form...

It is comforting to know this...It makes me less afraid.

IMHO.

Lenny

[ECHOES]

Existential Therapy: Death and Human Limitation

Some interesting reading here, if you like.

[jmariah001]

Recently I have had to deal with death just last month. My uncle who was only 49 died on the way to the recovery room after a routine procedure. Needless to say it was a difficult month.

[skeeweeaka]

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RelientK said:
In some post or another I stated that I was symptom free since December 2007. You know, I guess that wasn't entirely true.

I think quite a bit about death and dying. I am afraid to die. I think about my death day. I think about how I will die. I think about my loved ones. Rinse and repeat. I wouldn't say it is to the point of obsession or that it holds me back, but it is bothersome. It never happened until the Bipolar.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

I think a lot about death and dying too... It is a constant in my brain since diagnosed....

TJ

[sweetleaf]

Even on my best day, I think about dying, even if it's to feel grateful that I managed to avoid taking my own life to survive to feel that happiness.

When I am depressed and wishing for death a part of me still knows that a better feeling is around the corner, so I just hold on...

[littlefoot2008]

that's the problem i have also.i'm always thinking about if it will take long,what my parents and kids would act like.but i'm too scared to actually go through with it. plus it would really screw up my kids bad.i still think about it though.hang in there.

[myskycastle]

I rarely think of death or dying, but mostly just NOT existing. I feel like, "OK, I just want to go away; turn myself off until....a week from now." I deal with hypersomnia a lot as well as insomnia, and I think this is the cause of it. Along w/ the possibility of my being bipolar.

[snowflakes]

(((((RelientK)))))

I can say that most of us are afraid to die. And I think that is normal. Who else in this world wants to die? Certainly none! But that is just the reality of life. Its just a matter of who comes first and who goes last. And for us, it is in how we accept it. You need not to bother because it will happen to each and everyone of us. All you have to do is to leave all fears and worry behind. Never think of the negative sides instead think on the brighter side. Go out and mingle with others, chill and relax! Never be lonesome. HAve someone to talk to. Before you knew it, you will never come across that feeling anymore... Goodluck and Godbless!!!

[Angel_of_the_Past]

Not everyone is afraid to die. A lot of times death is a very calm and peaceful experience (transition). It can be a very spiritual experience.