[clknia]

I can never tell anymore if I'm behaving normally or if I'm having one big episode...I'm so parinoid all of the time trying to think clearly and do what I think I should do...does anyone else feel this way?

[Berries]

God yes! I can definitely relate to that!!

I have no idea if it's me or an illness that’s screaming in my head. If I am acting rationally and doing the right thing… Or am I just in an episode and none of this is real?

I can tell when other people's illnesses are doing the talking or the acting!

But I can't be objective when it comes to me.
Is that what you mean?

[St. John Wort]

Most every day I feel like that. I dropped off some woodwork I did for someone tonight and I was so high-strung and paranoid I just wanted to leave. I spent 15 minutes trying to decode any hidden messages in the conversation. And on most days I'm adament that I"M not the one thats crazy-everybody else is.

I hate being paranoid-its such a damn drain. I just have to keep asking myself whay any of it matters at all...

Medicine helps a little. Switched a week ago to invega. So far so good but it does keep me up at night. I'm still on a light enough dose that my mind gets reved up pretty good.

[rkba97]

I definitely feel that way all the time! I'm always wondering if people think I'm acting normally. But what is normal, anyway? I try to keep reminding myself that it's my own perceptions that I'm projecting onto other people, and that they're not consumed by the bipolar like I am. Most of the time I doubt the people around you are even thinking about it. And also, I do think one thing that's normal is to be worried about the way people perceive you. You just gotta keep in mind that you will always judge yourself much, much more harshly than anybody else ever would. Stay strong!

RK