Borderline PD symptoms description

I've lived in three countries. Papua New Guinea, Australia and currently reside in the UK. I used to think that relief to my challenges well described above by Echoe would go if I found a place where the grass was greener on the other side of the fence. Wishful thinking. I still have BPD traits although never diagnosed. Just describes be so accurately. I'm a very emotional person. Yes, life in England is still challenging, although I can say the grass is greener here...lol.

This is my first ever post online. Hope to learn a lot more about others so that I can understand myself better and be helpful to them.

Momokani

Hi Momokani and welcome to PC!

I have tried the "Geographical Solution" a few times myself. I'm glad that you did find greener grass

Hi Momokani! I too am in a similar situation to you, I haven't been diagnosed BPD, but I've had 4 different other dx's and feel that these are wrong and that BPD is correct. After finding this post by ECHOES I have somehow found the strength to discuss this with my family and will be seeing my psychiatrist soon (hopefully if I can get an appointement)

Hope you find some help here too

Welcome momokani to PC!!
Hello Echoes and Tatteredandtorn!

I am Holmes, I lead the BPD Chats
Mon. morn. 11 AM (est), Tues. night 7 PM (est)

DBT Skills are excellent in managing BPD symptoms!

DBT Chat is excellent: Tues. morn. 10:30 AM

Would love to see you all there!!!
Holmes!

Struggling this week, meltdown Sunday and Monday...."emergency" therapy session Monday which really helped. Really. Really I see how I do this to myself.
Amazing to me that I could reach out to my therapist and more amazing she can put up with me!!
Now to not let the awareness fade without learning something valuable. Time to journal!
I see my therapist again tomorrow.

I hope everyone else is having peaceful and contented days.

((((((((((( Echoes ))))))))))))

How would u describe BPD? I may be, but not sure. I struggling trying to figure out what I have...Depression, Anxiety, Social Phobia...? What is BPD?
Thanks!

((((((ECHOES))))))

Keep on Journaling!

My understanding of BPD is that is a "personality" problem not chemical. There fore medication will not change the problems causing most of the symptoms. BPD rarly respond to one on one therapy due to the fact that main symptom is the Stormy friendships part. BPD people tend to latch on to a person real fast and strong and then as soon as there is a hint of rejection ect thay pull away and sabotage the friendship. Theripst ase care to insure there BPD patients dont fall in love with them due this strong sudden connection. As soon as my last T diagnoised me with BPD he suddenly changed the therapy towards me and it had a negative effect on my OCD issues. He was pushing me to go into group therapy but I was petrified of groups at the time and I still am a little scared.

My new T disagrees with the BPD diagnosis due the fact that I have mostly improved with med's and on my own since taking a brack from my last T. My new T says my personailty difficulties are more likly due to my co-morbid disorders. I have depression, general anxiety disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder, and new T has diagnoise me with Post tramtic stress disorder

I would seriously not be looking at BPD as the problem unless you have tryed med's and therapy and nothing is working for you.

The difficulties we have create all kinds of things: depression, anxiety, splitting, rage, shutting down, fear of many things.

BPD .... is an illness or not? I'm confusing by everyone's statement that BPD is part of mental illness while others isn't. Could you put my mind at ease asap?

It is a disorder of development, to my thinking.

so it is not an illness as to develop a disorder?

Well, that is hard for me to answer because I view few mental health issues as 'illness'.
To me, BPD is the result of missing out on early experiences of attachment, or experiencing trauma. Something needed in development was somehow missed out on for some reason.
The term BPD to me is a way to describe the difficulties we have in relationships, work, and also the intense emotions and intense moods we experience... because of our perceptions formed early in life.

That's why I like the term 'disorder' rather than 'illness'. Just me

In australia at least BPD is not considered and offical mental illness as yet......It would be a mental illness in my oppinion as but there is less chemical involved and more social upbrining that causes it rather than just an chemical imbalance from what I read and what my last T and new T have tole me.

You more likly to have BPD when you've been a victom of a negative role models, or victimized by main caregivers ect. BPD is more to do with the way you really are as a person rather than a chemical imbalance changeing your personailtyu hench why its called a personailty disorder.

wow. im kind of speechless. that seems to fit me pretty well.

many thanks to ECHOES and mum2four for clear explanation and it does make sense to me at last.. I would rather disorder than an illness because of the upbringing in society issues but the term of relapses, does that mean its part of an illness?

I think relapses are to be expected was we learn, like any other learning.
Doing something differently takes practice.
It's all something to explore and learn from

ECHOES, in conclusion that BPD is definitely not mental illness but a disorder, meaning we'll have to learn from it and to practise whatever it throws at us. Last question that bothers me much, do BPD people need a medication as part of the treatment or not? (Currently I'm taking meds and wondering if I'm not illness but still taking meds for disorder?)

I would not call it a chemical illness and you can make steps to change what is making like hard for you in your personailty. I would say it can be slightly helped with anti-D's but more that you at hight risk of developing mental illness due to struggling with friendships ect.

My recovery has been basicly due to medication this if why my new T say no I dont have BPD like my last T said I had. My personaity problems were due to OCD rather than what I truly beleaived I was trying to do. I ruined friendship cause I thought I was protecting people from me by keeping them at a distance. My OCD made me feel like I was dangerous to people physiclly, mentally, emotionally.

Think of meds as something to take for symptoms, maybe. With BPD we have intense anxiety and/or depression and there are meds for that. For the causes, there is therapy.
To me, BPD is like a stunted development. We do reach adulthood, but we haven't developed fully. We have immature spots in our development that affect our perceptions which in turn affect how we deal with things like being alone, being in a relationship, speaking up for ourselves, so many things. We can feel hopelessness and anger intensely and easily and that can lead to depression and anxiety.

I can only tell you my history about meds. I feel it is up to the patient to take or not take meds; others feel differently and it might depend on the level of functioning the patient has at the time meds are considered.
I took meds for depression for many years. I decided to see what I was like without them because I felt emotionally numb. I wondered what I was like underneath the meds after all these years, so I went off them. I quit smoking and anxiety became unmanagable. I found my way back to therapy (this time researching and finding what kind of therapy and therapist I wanted) and shortly after beginning I read "let me out of here" by rachel riland, her experience with BPD. I thought the diagnosis fit and asked my therapist; she had already decided that BPD fit me although she hadn't yet shared that with me (she doesn't want patients to get too hung up on diagnosis). By sheer coincidence I had chosen a therapist who not only was psychoanalytic, but also specializes in BPD. Lucky me She introduced me to the idea of attachment disorder and that BPD is a disorder of early development. We discussed meds and she is neither for nor against, and stated that they are often helpful during difficult periods of therapy.

Anyway, as far as meds go, if they are suggested and are helping, then that's good.
If you are not sure about the role of meds in your treatment, I really encourage you to talk to those who provide your care.

Exactly and thats why started to compleatly disagree with the BPD diagnosies. because for me on I never had intence anger or hoplessness, the mood swing I did have were controled by adressing my OCD issues with the situation or thoughts i was dealing. My last t said BPD need intence group therapy and can take 10y to over some min as it not a chemical imblance causing the negaitve thoughts its the way you were rasied the beleifes that you have in side you the foundations of beleifs I call them from where you really base all you other choices on. Where as me I never wanted to listen to my OCD thoughts I wanted to so badly ignore them and do what I wanted that once the med's had eased the OCD thinking I was able to do what I was alway trying to do in the first place.

many thanks for your explanations and everything is answered to my questions. Keep up with your support and sharing too

Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker (on the ASK page here on PC) answers a question: "What is the best medicine for Borderline Personality Disorder".

http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-ther...lity-disorder/