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#151
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#152
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Me to exactly...by the end of the day at times I am literally exhausted from all the different feelings and the chaos in my head. I think that's how to explain it anyway?!?!
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#153
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This is a very scary realization. Ive been in denial about what has been going on with me for a few years but this is me to a T.
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#154
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It is beyond me how we can separate the mental and physical sciences.
I was sad when I read the bpd list, I have finally found the box I fit in and I didn't want to be in a box. I wish I felt better about having a dx and the encouragement you all share, but I guess I was holding out that it was the rest of the world that was screwed up and I was normal... ![]() I worked really hard all my life to try and fit in, made a mess of most of it and well finally decided to tell everything of how I think and feel to the pros. It was a good thing, now some healing maybe even hope to get stable. As far as the discussions on illness versus disorder well there are body disorders too, all it means is that there are a combination of factors that have made your symptoms appear. It isn't whether medicine is part of the treatment. There are many disorders that require medication. I have a Chronic Pain Disorder and it is neurological. Gee that even connects to the brain ![]()
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aaaaAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHhhhhhhh... okay, all better. |
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#155
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I havent been diagnosed with anything yet, but relate to all of it. It feels like a roller coaster that goes on forever.
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#156
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Sounds like me alright. I can go from feeling love for someone, then if they offend me somehow I can shut them out, cuss at them to myself and feel hate. Bu tin the past, when I love dit was intense and I made them a priority and kind of lost myself?
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#157
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When I read that very first post describing what Borderline Personality Disorder is, my heart literally jumped & started pounding. Finally I can put a finger on what I've been dealing with my WHOLE life. I've never been able to describe it, EVER. I feel calmer after reading, because i'm constantly dissecting my every move, trying to figure out what is wrong with me, but i've never been able to make any sense of it.
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#158
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I can resonate with this
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#159
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I still...never heard of psychosis involved in borderline...nor hallucinations....specifically related to BPD...is there an informative link for this?
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#160
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Hi, wolfie--In the DSM, #9 allows for it under severe dissociative symptoms. Try borderlinepersonalitytoday.com..they have discussions of symptoms, and bpdcentral.
I have to deal with this under severe stress. |
#161
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Is it possible then...I am not D.I.D?That'd be nice...I am on meds for d.i.d and ppl said I shouldn't have been dx'd so fast...Geodon btw.I have had very few incidents since the meds....tell me ...(crosses fingers)...that I may not be d.i.d...if it is part of my B.P.D...I'd be relieved.
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#162
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Maybe it depends upon the conditions under which you have the episodes?
I don't know...I took Geodon (and Risperdal) for episodes, but when the stress eased, about a year into psychopharmaceutical therapy....I didn't need the anit-psychotics. Which was great because I gained 40 lbs in 6 mos on Risperdal...... I do still have the occasional episode, but very, very mild and now only seeing things and I know they are not there. It's unnerving, but I know what it is, that it will pass very quickly, and it does. This is my experience. I think it is very important to get your own evaluated in terms of some kind of differential... ![]() ![]() ![]() |
#163
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Psoriatic Arthritis, Borderline Personality Disorder, and about a 100 other things. ![]() |
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#164
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Echos...THX for putting this up...very informative and....saw a lot of myself in there....an eye opener...again, THX
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#165
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Wolf...maybe not D.I.D.? .... need to look deeper into this maybe?
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#166
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Idk...I got off the geodon and the symptoms returned.I phoned my doc and I am supposed to get back on.It happens when I am very stressed.When I called the doc whose care I was under during last hospitalization ...I asked why I was dx so fast and he said that it was based on this hospitalization as well as my history since 1994.I am very stressed because the 7th is son bday and with xmas I soooo missed my mum her hubby my son and my oldest too.grr....annnnnywayzzz
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#167
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Wow, this seems so much like me. And I thought I was just imagining all of the chaos in my head. Getting a psychological evaluation on Monday, though, so I guess I 'll find out...
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#168
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Oh, there ARE some like me out there!! I waited 30 years for a psych to diagnose what was wrong with me. I think that's sad. Thankyou for this site. XXX
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#169
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I think my mom has BPD, everything I read and especially what I have lived through the past 50 years, tells me this is it. I am trying to prcess this and the chaos she continues to create!
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#170
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I think I have this, even though I am only seventeen.
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"My only hope lies in my despair." |
#171
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I'd like to respond to a post you made earlier, Wolfsong: "I still...never heard of psychosis involved in borderline...nor hallucinations....specifically related to BPD...is there an informative link for this?
![]() If you read anything of the research by Kernberg, Clarkin, Yoeman or Linehan (clincial research writings), you'll find them discuss periods of psychoic thinking by individuals with BPD. This is not to say that ALL people diagnosed with BPD experience psychotic thinking, delusions and/or hallucinations. It is usually observed in individuals who are highly stressed. For example, Clarkin talks about individuals with BPD having delusional/psychotic reactions in therapy (evident only in therapy and not outside the therapeutic setting). I think he talks about a client believing that the therapist "spit on the sidewalk" everytime he saw her out in the community. Didn't happen, or at least, CLarkin said it didn't happen LOL, but the client truly believed that her therapist was performing this act whenever he observed her in the community. From a personal aside, I can say that about eight years ago when I had a major breakdown, I was walking along the sidewalk near a major intersection. I suddenly saw a small dog dart out into the middle of the road and then crushed beneath the tires of a car. I reacted with horror. I remember the incident distinctly--every physical and emotional reaction on my part. When I opened my eyes, I was surprised to see the cars passing normally, no poor dog dead in the roadway, not even a screech of tires indicating that cars tried to dodge a dog. I was under terrible emotional stress at the time. Have I hallucinated since. Absolutely not. In fact, I'm a person with BPD who does not act out in rage (my rage is directed inward) and I have been successfully employed in a high level job for over twenty-seven years. My BPD traits are more about the Quiet Borderline (interesting book on that subject by Yance Sherwood and Charles Cohen). The important thing to remember about BPD is that it doesn't present cleanly and perfectly as described by the DSM. As people tell us who treat BPD, we have to stop thinking in Black and White, treaters need to remember that BPD isn't Black and White--there are shades of gray in there too! |
#172
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I have been married 30 years to, what I only now discovered, a man with BPD. Walking on eggshells really explains how our children and I have lived these many years. My husband and I separated several months ago. He has stormed out of my life many times and will most likely return once again, and this time I want to be ready nd educated to cope with his mood swings, frustration, and anger. I hope I have come to the right place! Thank you for being there.
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#173
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I'm sorry you are having difficulty in your marriage. Here is another site that is geared toward families of borderline personality disorder that you might find useful, too. http://www.bpdfamily.com/message_board/ Best wishes to you! |
#174
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I must say i love this description! possibly the best one ive seen...
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#175
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Wow, thanks for that description. I have been diagnosed with BPD for several years now but this is the first time I have read a description that I could totally identify with. For once it was in plain English and it made sense to me. It also seems to me that for about the last 2 months at least my BPD has been out of control so right now it all really makes sense. So, really, thanks it helped a lot.
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