The Up-side of being Borderline?

Oh, crap! I had a nice little message typed out about a few of my experiences where having a borderline personality actually helped rather than hindered. Then, when I went to submit it, I "timed out" and it disappeared.

Since I am not inclined at the moment to re-write it, I thought I could at least start a thread about this topic. I don't know if this type of discussion has been explored in this forum before (almost sure it has at some point...), but I am hoping that some of you may have had experiences where being Borderline hasn't always been a soul-sapping existence.

I would love to hear your stories. I need to hear them. I can't stand continually being crushed by all the negative aspects being written about BPD.

We are good people and we deserve some good news, don't you think?

Thanks in advance! And I will be back to post my "up-side" stories.

Thank you for posting this. What a positive and great idea. Right now I can only say that I think borderling people are very caring, sometimes it seems like we're not, but personally I think that is due to our own problems and not the people we sometimes seem to 'wrong'? I hope you understood that sigh, Ophelia x

((((((((((Borderline personality sufferers)))))))))))))))))

first of all... Arg. That would have pissed me off so much. Anyway, i dont think you should define yourself only by your bpd. There are many aspects to everyone not just one. But if you need to hear something good then i will say that we are never boring and we um yeah idk. Thats all i got. It will get better

wow that was deep. I totally get that

I get that too

AAAhhhh what a great thread!

1. My werewolf and I are good friends and spend time on our relationship.

2. As much as my hyper-vigilance makes me ill sometimes, I know that i will protect those I love without compunction.

3. That fear and love go hand in hand.....they are not mutually exclusive and both are necessary for one cannot exist without the other.......it is about accepting this with courage.

4. That despite my terrible emotional knowledge, people now love me for who i am.......because I learning to love who i am.

5. BPD is not seperate from me......it exists alongside of me......and is part of my personality......it is the volatile, courageous, paranoid and suspicious side......which has probably saved my life in more ways than one, even when trying to destroy.

6. BPD is part of my caring, of my returning to spirit.....it has tested me beyond boundaries and forgiven me the same.......it has tried to maim, and sabotage......but I forgive it......

For despite its transgressions......it loves me anyway......for we......

are me.

Take good care of self, babe.......your precious, precious spirit.....you are on the path of greatness.

Move with stillness through this day.....

Big Hugs

Michah

Wow! Thanks to everyone! I was really quite surprised to have received so many posts.

Alot of the up-sides I have been noticing have been to do with the B&W thinking aspect of this disorder. I should note that I am not always so aware, but when I have time to contemplate, I notice things like this:

When I am not personally involved in a situation, I can see both sides to a story quite clearly. That doesn't mean I can and do stay neutral, though I do vacillate from side to side. And, it's not to say that one side is considered black (i.e. bad) or white (i.e. good), per se, but having this ability seems to allow me to see both sides much deeper than those whose convictions are solidly placed on one side of an argument or another.

Sometimes, I may go a bit to far in my thinking. For me, I always take it to the max, but if I can maintain a sense of logic, it is hard not to empathize with both sides.

For me, this is GREAT! I say this because I think with my personality, I would always have hard-core convictions on any given matter. And it's almost impossible to be hard-core about anything when one can see both ends of the spectrum.

Does anyone feel the same in this instance?

More to follow (not taking the chance of being "timed out" again).

I do, Ophelia!

Can you not energize someone when passion is behind the idea??!! I can! Just as easily as I can suck the joy out of the room when I'm on the darker side, when I'm on the lighter side, I have this excitement within me and it seems to be infectious.

It feels good to make people feel good! It feels good to get out of my head!

Thank you for this post!

"Borderlines" are okay in a lot of ways!

1) my husband says I am fun to be with.

2) he says I am very feeling and compassionate.

he says other things, too.

I am posting what he says because I am still having trouble believing it.

when you are raised with "All you do is complain" or "You are exhausting/unpleasant to be around", it is hard to believe anyone could appreciate any good about me.

so I really thank you!

Billi

I am so there with you. That's all I've every been told my whole life so when anyone says anything nice about me I don't know how to respond!

It is this very thing - that BPD is NOT separate from me - that is the most difficult to accept. I've tried to accept the idea that BPD is a condition (of sorts) that I have, but that is not true. It is WHO I AM. I cannot separate my 'being' from it. I cannot help but define myself by it and be defined by it by others, much like sociopaths cannot separate their being from who/what they are. If I were merely suffering from, say, depression, then a separation of personality could be made.

I really don't know where I am going with this, but I feel it is IMPERATIVE to accept the fact that there is no "cure" or there is no pill that I can take that will help. I only have the choice of seeing myself in a very deep, no-holds-barred honest way in order to overcome the tragic behaviours I will ultimately display over and over.

This takes ALOT of energy, time, self-analyzing (with AND without outside help), forgiveness, reparation to those I have hurt, and on and on.

I am sometimes amazed at the strength it takes to continue on! So, therefore, I am strong! Very strong! Another upside!!!

Billi and Renee: It is a strange feeling to be complimented, isn't it? Even when I know I am deserving, it still doesn't feel right with me. I can gush to others about how proud I am of a certain success, but when it comes to accepting it from others, it just does not compute. I even find myself getting angry at times when people compliment me.

So, how does one deal with this? Fortunately(?), I have narcissistic tendencies, so I can, at times, hold on to those praises and enjoy them for what they are, but eventually they are either squashed by my internal chatter or forgotten completely. I find I must look for the good in myself, again and again. I can never seem to build upon my successes. I am always trying to rebuild from, what I perceive as, nothing. Moving forward becomes almost an impossibility. In fact, if it weren't for outside forces, I would be frozen in time/thought/space...

Still looking for an up-side here, I guess...