[pinkcorr]

I feel so so sad. I've tried really hard all weekend to push how I'm feeling away and keep busy. While keeping busy and distracting can be helpful, I know that pushing how I feel away isn't helpful. When I push the feelings away they eventually come to the surface and feel even more overwhelming. I'm quite tearful, I don't want to harm myself or anything. But I feel like I'm just about to crumble into a heap, I can't really bawl and cry just now as my 6 year old nephew is staying over and he's sleeping. I'm upset about the confrontation I had with my mum this week after telling her I wouldn't be spending Christmas with her and my step dad. I posted about this on the abuse part of the board. There's a few other things going on in my group therapy. I seem to get worse when I can't control things, I'm not sure how to teach myself not to get like this. I know I can't control everything. I guess I need to keep talking about this in therapy.

I don't know if its ok to post this here, (I'm so unsure of most of the things I do) Anyway I just wanted to write this somewhere. I'm hoping I can go to bed and will be able to sleep soon.

x x x x

[ECHOES]

(((pinkcorr))) Sometimes all we can do is just exactly what you've done: sit with the feelings, acknowledge where they come from, and try to let the knowledge that we can't control anything be relieving. Writing can help a lot too. Do you write in a journal or notebook? Sometimes when I write, more things come to mind about what I'm feeling and why.

Do you have a therapy appointment soon?

[pinkcorr]

Originally Posted by ECHOES

(((pinkcorr))) Sometimes all we can do is just exactly what you've done: sit with the feelings, acknowledge where they come from, and try to let the knowledge that we can't control anything be relieving. Writing can help a lot too. Do you write in a journal or notebook? Sometimes when I write, more things come to mind about what I'm feeling and why.

Do you have a therapy appointment soon?

Thanks ECHOES

Yeah, I have an online journal but haven't been writing in it much lately. I have therapy tomorrow, I'm in group therapy 3 full days a week.

I'm sitting here having a cry while watching "I dreamed a dream, The Susan Boyle Story" Need to cry just now.

x x x x

(((((((((((( pinkcorr )))))))))))))

[ECHOES]

Crying can be very relieving. I hope you feel better tomorrow after a good night's sleep.

[Fuzzybear]

((((((((((((((( pinkcorr ))))))))))))))))

[Princess Butterfly]

how are you feeling now hunni?

[mlpHolmes]

PINKCORR

[blues]

I'm so sad i haven't left my bed in days. Only if i have to use the bathroom. Dont even it and rarely shower. No one calls me. Ever. I quit my job couple of years ago and dont think i can ever face "the real world" again. Im scared to wake up dead one day and for no one to even notice. Im a smart, pretty woman in my late 30s who has lost it all due to depression and insecurities. I dont know who i am anymore. Living is pointless to me but i dont have the guts to force myself out of living. Im very scared for waking one more day alone and depressed, with no one to care for me. I need help but i dont go to doctors anymore...nothing has worked. I am scared, lonely (very), and beyond sad. I came here just to pretend i have "someone" to talk to. HELP!!!!!!!!