[MissMay1977]

I am curious as to what others do when they all of a sudden feel a wave of overwhelming emotions. I have been experiencing huge waves of overwhelming emotions of sadness and hopelessness in the evenings for awhile now. How do you guys cope with this?

[Perna]

I either dive under them and check them out or I ride them, like actual waves.

I once noticed a long time ago that my feelings changed at 4:30 every afternoon. I got curious and observed and did some soul searching and learned a great deal about myself. I think that time was important to me probably because back in my childhood in the 1950's when we would come home from school, my stepmother would let us get a snack until a certain time and the "the kitchen is closed!" and we had to wait until dinner to get anything more to eat. So, if we got doing something after school and "forgot" it would be too late, later and we'd have to wait a couple hours until dinner. But it was a slightly negative division of my day.

Do you have anything that happened long ago in the evening that was sad? Did you want something you didn't get then or have to do something you didn't like? Did something happen recently (in recent years) some evening (divorce, parent dying, etc.)?

[ECHOES]

It takes practice and the wave sure gets me sometimes, knocking me right into the surf.

Catching that wave when it begins is key. What happens, what thoughts and feelings are there when the overwhelming begins. I'm not saying it's easy to do, but it is something to work hard on so you can see what it's all about.
For example, it might start with feeling lonely, and thoughts about loneliness turn to despair because it seems like it will always be this way? You might want to write about it in a journal to help you remember, to look at and think about later.

Distraction can help by doing something that takes focusing, if you're able to do that. A book, tv, a hobby, a walk, a phone call to a friend...

[MissMay1977]

Originally Posted by ECHOES

It takes practice and the wave sure gets me sometimes, knocking me right into the surf.

Catching that wave when it begins is key. What happens, what thoughts and feelings are there when the overwhelming begins. I'm not saying it's easy to do, but it is something to work hard on so you can see what it's all about.
For example, it might start with feeling lonely, and thoughts about loneliness turn to despair because it seems like it will always be this way? You might want to write about it in a journal to help you remember, to look at and think about later.

Distraction can help by doing something that takes focusing, if you're able to do that. A book, tv, a hobby, a walk, a phone call to a friend...

I think you are right that my primary emotions turn into secondary emotions and then it is all down hill from there. I will try to write down my thoughts and emotions when this is happening. Thanks!

[bpd2]

These are the solutions that help me most:
1. Best of all, learn what time(s) of days deplete your positivity; then prepare ahead of time with a distraction that will take you away from that: like start an hour-long exercise effort half an hour before the usual turn of the tide.
2. Exercise, and because you're probably not going to want to do it once you're blue, tell yourself you only have to do it for 10 minutes. That makes a difference--keep the "demand" very small, so that a) you can do it, and b) you can build on that small success.
3. Put in a movie to watch that is a comedy or a Disney/Pixar with lots of singing.
4. Play an instrument, if you play, and pick a piece that you're trying to learn so that the effort to concentrate takes over.
5. HUGS from everyone you meet--I have yet to meet a person who wouldn't hug me if I asked, and if they are hesitant at first, I say, "like this:" and give them a sideways hug with a little jostle of the shoulder.
6. I love gardening so I go look for plants (even if I don't buy one) or at seed packets--which I can always afford.....and, I keep potting soil and those jiffy pot trays around so that I can plant seeds if I want to, but just the idea of thinking about the garden in spring helps a little.
7. Bake--I keep mixes on hand for just this reason....brownies, I confess. They're fast, fast, fast to mix up, you get to smell them baking, and in 45-55 minutes, you get a wonderful treat, just for you--or whomever you want to share with........sometimes I resent the sharing, because I'm often angry when that wave catches me...but I do share if I have to, and sometimes that leads to a distraction.

So.......that's mostly what I do----or read, cause I always have at least two books going at once, and usually stip to non-fiction, because I can't trust fiction not to trigger me in some way. I love, for example, geology....

[Chronic]

Sometimes I don't cope at all, and will use unhelpful behaviours. Other times when I can catch the emotion in time, I prepare to make a recipe and go shopping for all the ingredients, or at the moment I am looking for some ornaments for my living room, so I either go online to look or go shopping, or go to the library. I usually find that as much I want to hide in my bed, if I can drag myself out for a walk and be around people even if I'm not actually with anyone, this helps. For me having a specific goal helps me to focus on something other than the emotion. However this is much easier said than done. It takes a lot of effort and I very often fail at this

[sugahorse1]

I'm a bit like Chronic.
Sometimes they can really floor me, and I just curl up in bed. I have some unhealthy coping skills, like a glass of wine.
But I try listen to music I know will distract me, or I tell my BF that I'm starting to feel depressed and he'll give me some extra attention and try distract me.
Or I take a Klonopin to numb the feelings.
Or I've texted my T, asking for a motivational text back.
I try share my emotions here, as it helps to get others' perspectives and allows one to do a lot of soul searching

[missmoodyblues86]

I go outside and ride my bike, preferably to the beach, as the waves tend to calm me, I cannot stand being inside the house as I start to feel claustaphobic.