[greyclouds]

I don't. Want to die, but if I don't wake in morning so. That will be it

[Girl_Interrupted]

Trigger icon please, or a warning.

[BrokenNBeautiful]

Originally Posted by greyclouds

I don't. Want to die, but if I don't wake in morning so. That will be it

You don't have to act on your feelings.

You are not alone.

I know this sounds lame.

I just want you to know that you can live thru this.

i know it's hard.

I am still here; I don't know why. I am just stubborn.

I am afraid to die.

And I am even afraid i might miss something if I do. lol (rueful lol)

Carol

[msjanalyn]

You are not alone. Keep your head up - things get better/change - they always do.

[greyclouds]

Thanks for your support apart from girl interrupted!!

I'm sorry I am okay, and sorry if you where worried that was not my intention.
I had no intention of doing anything stupid.
It was what it said.

[MDDBPDPTSD]

What I read was that you were okay with it if you died, like you dont really want to stay alive anymore, but you are not going to do anything active about dying.

I know I cannot kill me, so I am not either. But I also know that once this life ends, the pain will end too and so I do wish for death to come soon.

It probably wont though.

[greyclouds]

(( hugs))
I'm going to find away to be happy, because that's what I deserve.

And so do you

[AngelWolf3]

I hope you are feeling better today (I know that sounds incredibly lame...) but I really do, and it looks like by the last thread, you might be finding a way to do that...I hope you are in a good place!

I've reassessed my own thoughts that used to be about wanting it to be over. i realized that with all the things in my life, my kids and much more, that even when I am that down, if I remember them, remember those things, it may not remove the dark feelings but it gives me just enough of an edge to get through the next night, hours or soemtimes even just minutes.

I also realized that it's not usually that I want completely out of life, its that I want whatever overwhelming darkness that surrounds me to come to an end. That I just want out of the absolute pain at the moment. When I started seeing it this way, ending it or even not caring if I made it to the next day became a non-option.

Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006

I also realized that it's not usually that I want completely out of life, its that I want whatever overwhelming darkness that surrounds me to come to an end.

Yes...when the darkness is at it's worst, when the pain, even though it may not be in place very long, seems to be neverending and consumes all, that is when the thoughts of ending it all are the strongest, not because you want to die and truly end it all but because you're willing to do just about anything to make it end.......

[LaneyT87]

Originally Posted by Maranara

Yes...when the darkness is at it's worst, when the pain, even though it may not be in place very long, seems to be neverending and consumes all, that is when the thoughts of ending it all are the strongest, not because you want to die and truly end it all but because you're willing to do just about anything to make it end.......

That is how I feel. My doc said that a majority of people do.