Goals....

Yep, another long diatribe. I'm starting to feel like I'm leaving mindless dribble that no one cares about but me, but this is one of my only outlets, so here I go again.

I may not have a gigantic amount of confidence in myself, but I do have relative confidence in what I can do. The problem, is, however, that I've never been gigantically sucessful because I've never been supported. I'm always told that I'm shooting too high, I'm not qualified, I'm creating a pipe dream, and that I just look outside the box too much. That I should basically get a 9-5 job and be happy. For a while, I pursue things, but then, with no support, it all falls apart. It's hard to believe in yourself when no one else does, consistantly. I have tried at least 4 at-home businesses. Everyone failed miserably because no one would help or even offer words of support now and then. Looking back, a few of those businesses probably wouldn't have made it regardless, but I believe I stood a good chance with one or two if I'd just been supported just a little. Well, I have reached the mindset to try again. I have to make my life better and I feel I'm running out of time to do anything about it.....

I have four goals:

1. To find that elusive job, and in a field I'd be happy in. I'm tired of being told what I'm qualified in by others. I'm searching USPS, university, and government jobs. It would be different and should pay fairly well with good benefits.

2. I have a picture book I've been working off and on for over a year. Out of everything I've written, I believe it stands the best chance of publication. I'm teaching myself to draw just to write it. I need to work on it and complete it. I cannot put a deadline on it, but I'd like to think I could get most of it done by the end of the year.

3. I need to write on my blog regularly and work on promoting it. This is probably the hardest one for me to do, but I've had a lot of people (outside of people at home) say that it's good and possibly book material. I need to do what I can to make it that way.

4. I have a small eBay business. I currently have about 35 items listed. You can list up to 50 items for free. I need to get up to the 50 and keep it there. I will never be able to support myself with eBay, but I could possibly make enough money to take a day off work now and then which would help some of my other goals.

Now, as for actually DOING them. I can pittle with my drawing for the picture book and do occasional eBay listings while I'm working....but I can't touch the other two. My work leaves me brain dead after a while and there's just not enough of me to be able to look for a job or work on my blog while working.

Now the hard part and the part I need help in somehow. I need to stay motivated. I have no one at home who will help with this. That's one of the reasons I always end up stopping in despair. Any thoughts or suggestions would be nice. You're welcome to check out my blog, my eBay name is vampswife, I may be able to share a few pages of my book with you or, better yet, set up an album on my profile page with it, and I'll share with you my ongoing job search. Due to my work, working about 20 days in a row, local support groups are probably out but I'll look in to it. I don't expect you to give me any miracles in this regard, but I really, really want to make something actually work out for a change......

Hiya

Good for you! I think it's a great thing to think outside the box. Who would have accomplished great things without doing just that. Maybe once you have made head way with it you will start getting the support and encouragement you need and want. Never give up on your dreams....you would just be left in limbo if you did! Start and aim small and build on your ideas step by step. I am not one for thinking outside the box or even being that ambitious but admire ppl that are and you certainly sound as though you are.

Keep going! I am sure you will pick up support etc along the way. I know it would be ideal at the beginning but if you don't have it, don't let it stop you from being where you want to be. And most of all, unless causing you significant damage, don't give up!

.......

It's good to have the goals. I'm glad you're looking at those things.

The only advice i have to offer is this one with a question. How many of the days you work are you compelled to work internally? I mean, I'm not putting you down for doing so at all, it's commendable, but in regards to finding another job if you really want to, can you not work some of the extra days you take on to work on looking? If they are forcing you to work overtime, I can understand that you can't but if they are optional days you might consider one or two of them to take off and look. Just a suggestion.

Also If they do force you to work that many days I'd look at the labor laws in the state. Although I know it may not help, it would be worth it to look at.

Make it a priority to get out of there and into a better job. It's the only way!

It sounds to me like one of your common key elements is no support (Have I been listening/reading correctly :-) so I would make creating support one of my primary goals?

Can you get someone studying to be a "coach" take you on as a project? Maybe trade someone help/support for you helping them in their writing or creating a blog, etc.? Look into your blog supporters, see if you can turn them into life supporters?

Figure out what you think support would mean to you, how it would help you? If you want support groups but don't have time for face-to-face ones, maybe join some online networking groups: 20 Social Networking Sites for Business Professionals - SitePoint especially some eBay groups? Groups - The eBay Community

ok, so here are some thoughts for what they are worth.
As for your goals, they are great. They are also kinda HUGE!!!! Can you break them down into more bite size and measureable pieces? For example, "work on blog regularly and work on promoting it". Could that become "work on blog for 30 minutes every Monday and Thursday". Not having experiences promoting a blog, I don't know what that entails, but could you set the same sort of goals for that piece of it. Something specific that you are going to do at a specific time. That way you can easily see what you have accomplished. Also, my thinking is often very confused, so I find it helpful to write down my goals, specifically what I intend to do and by when. A "to do" list if you will. When I can cross something off that list it is a great feeling. And though it is easier said than done, don't worry about what others are saying about your ability. Just be sure that you are not telling yourself that you can't accomplish things. I find that I am almost always my own worst enemy when it comes to negativity. Don't know if this helps or not, but it's what I've got to share. Know that I am in your corner (I have told you before I love your blog) and I would be happy to hear how things are going for you and the progress you are making.

All very good suggestions

Perna, always has good advice

I like the idea of a picture book. I think setting up a picture album would be a good idea.

I'm not forced to work the hours that I'm working. There's a problem, though. I am also off long periods of time, as much as a week or so at a time. I feel compelled to work the hours I am given during the long stretches to make up for it even though I suffer due to it. If I could recover quickly from my long stretches it would be okay, but it's become harder and harder to do. When I get off, I'm a total wreck for a few days. During my last period of days off, I did take the USPS test and find the university job, so I am making progress although too slow.

I am back here for the community and support. Even though this place can have adverse affects on me, I have to have that support. I'm not an island, even though I pretended and did a pretty good job for a long time.

It is a priority, believe me. I got off work at 7:30MT last night and still took time to look around. And if I get an interview, time will be taken off...there's no question about that at all.

Thank you so much for the suggestions and for standing by me.....

I'll check them out...thank you so much.

An edit...the eBay thing is strictly a question/answer forum. That's something I really don't need at this time; I've been selling for almost two years. I will check out the other one, but requires too much brain power for the moment...sigh.

I write a list usually at the beginning of the day. On days I work, which is unfortunately the next who knows how many, the blog goes by the waistside. The writing isn't hard...the promoting is much, much harder.

I AM my worst enemy when it comes to negativity....I know that too well...but I am trying to stay positive. I know people are in my corner....I really do. It's just...hard sometimes, when you don't hear it from the ones who should support you the most. I'm trying....and appreciate you and all who have reached out.

I'll put the few pics of my book on my profile soon. It's a picture alphabet book with a unique main character. I've never enjoyed drawing but have kinda-sorta taught myself how just for the project.... I'm hoping I can branch out and write others. It was originally intended to be for an older audience, but I guess it's working out okay.

I know how it is to be compelled. Thing is though, you don't have to grab every single day open. I strongly suggest using one of your given days off and actually taking it. You shouldn't feel guilty about that. Do that and do what you can't do while working.

I've started my own support group...for anyone seeing a job. My situation may be a bit different, but I know I'm not alone in this. Maybe we can help one another.

http://forums.psychcentral.com/group...#gmessage49098

Starting the slide....I guess a night of sleeplessness will do that. Worked on a blog entry but didn't finish it. Didn't have time for anything else. Going to try to rouse myself shortly to list a few things. Did sell something this morning so that was nice.