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#1
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...trying to have self respect?...
I must be kidding I can meet someone at sunrise... fall in love with them way before lunch, and suddenly hate them in the early afternoon. so a day of attempted intimacy turns into a disaster ...extend this into days weeks and years... it's like a million personal failures... irretrievable intimate possibilities I want the love but I cannot handle the pressure... I cannot win just today I completely mis-understand this borderline apart from the urge to isolate |
![]() allme, BlueInanna, HealingNSuffering, Lmats
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#2
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I understand *sigh* Mostly, I am isolated through choice. I go through bouts of seeing ppl and then retreat due to multiple reasons. It's just too hard to sustain constant or regular contact with a person. It's all just too much sometimes.
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’’In the end, it’s not going to matter how many breaths you took, but how many moments took your breath away’’ |
![]() dubblemonkey, Morgansangel
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![]() Morgansangel, MoxieDoxie, Mustkeepjob32
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#3
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I agree, keeping friends is like a behavior that while in theory should be rewarding, just opens me up to too much pain. I guess if I was "normal", I could be fine. So that's why just have innumerable acquaintances.
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Medications: Venlafaxine (Effexor) 75mg dailyDivalproex (Valproic Acid) 600mg daily Seroquel (Quetiapine) 100mg daily ZMAN
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![]() dubblemonkey, Morgansangel
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#4
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I go back and forth between trying to keep friends, and not wanting anything to do with anyone ever. Sometimes I wish I could just ship myself off to some foreign land where nobody knows me and start off fresh.
Friends are just not worth it for me. ![]()
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"I can't live up; I can't let down."
BPD, depression, panic disorder |
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