Disconnected

Does anyone else ever feel that they are kind of infinitely alone...kind of that lonely in a crowded room feeling. I just feel like I have no close friends anymore (whether by my or their doing) and I'm really not close with my family anymore either. I spend most of my time alone with my cat. I feel like I don't come first in anyone's life, if that makes sense. Anyone else struggle with this and what do you do to feel more connected?

I feel the exactly the same way I sit here with my computer to keep me steady or less lonely but all and all I feel all alone.

That is a nearly constant struggle of mine, and it has been for years! I have moments of clarity, where I actually feel "connected" to someone, but that occurs less than once a month.

I have a few very close friends, I know they would 'jump' for me if I'm in trouble.
But still I feel alone. Like I shouldn't bother them with my problems.
It's also difficult to give the same love back.

Ooh same! Even when I am 'close to people', I still feel separate.

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I have no irl friends that I am close to. The only people I am close to are my husband and son and right now my son is draining me and that makes me feel like a horrible mom. I feel so alone most of the time, and it sucks.

i'm sorry you feel that way, you are not a terrible mom, i can tell just by reading your posts! you are trying your hardest and that is what matters most.

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trying to navigate his special needs while sick (I still have bronchitis) is really bringing me down. It did not help that he was off school on thursday and friday (teachers' convention), we both do better with a routine.

Yes, I feel the same way. I don't have any close friends either.

I'm close to my husband but that is about it. I fear engulfment as well as rejection from others so I don't make close friends easily.

I feel disconnected from loved ones all the time.I guess it doesn't help that I am still involved with my.abusive parents. But for me being bpd it is quite common to feel so alone. I wanted answers as to why i feel that way i do and I hit most of the symptoms of bpd. My therapist and pdoc.both said I.have it.so that's why I researched it. Have you read up on it? It helped me understand myself better. You are not alone in yr pain. Dbt which is dialectical behavior therapy helped me alot with the bpd symptoms. I learned to live in wise mind and got.me out of emotional mind. Google.It.it's worth a shot. Duo you have a.good b therapist and.pdoc whom you can trust? That makes all the difference for me. Keep us posted on how yr doing ok? I do care cause I know where you are.

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Thanks so much! I do have a therapist and a pdoc and just got out of a dbt iop. I think the feelings are definitely bpd related, the feeling of being separate and misunderstood.

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Yes, i also fear being too drawn into and engulfed by others lives bit at the same time i want to be close to people and dont know how. I can only go so far in a relationship, i can be comfortable, but there is a wall.

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I definitely do better with a routine as well! I hope you are feeling a little better

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