Moving and letting go

Feeling deeply sad and deeply disoriented by my upcoming move.

I'm selling and leaving a house and neighborhood I love.

I'm terminating with a T I adore, who's been a constant for me over four tumultuous years and seen me through some really hard times and who's helped me so much.

I hate not knowing what my new life will be like, so that's really stressful for me. Change is hard. Blind change is really hard.

And... As I tend to do... I've managed to create or attract chaos in some of my relationships just as I'm leaving. What I really want is to leave on good terms with everyone, but somehow (and I truly can't figure this out) I create drama or drama finds me.

Just so sad.

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Moving is a big step, it'd give anyone anxiety, but especially those with BPD because we crave stability so much in the world around us.
I hope that you will be able to set right your relationships before you go, hopefully it's nothing too bad that you'll have to leave on bad terms. :/

(((((LemonZest35)))))

I hope that this move begins to smooth out for you soon. Moving is never fun or easy for anyone, especially us.

Try not to be too hard on yourself. Things will get better. Practice self-calming techniques whenever you have a few minutes, to get yourself back into more of a clear mind. (((hugs)))

jeez, i just know in theory about moving on. i never moved on, maybe i'm beginning to, and it feels like the scariest thing in the world. i don't fear death, believe in no god, and already suffer from chronic pain. guess the mental pain overwhelms it. yet today, something went right...but i'm scared.

Thanks all. In my head I knew how important the stability of my surroundings are to me, but now that those surroundings and people are changing, wow - I really feel the effects. I feel like I don't know who I am. I don't know which way is up.

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