urges

Then don't read my thread why did you even have to answer no I feel even worse thanks a heap. And treatment as in what there are all kinds of treatments just because I choose a different one to you doesn't make it not treatment, and why the hell is everything single freaking thing I do always criticized. Ugh you jut triggered a whole bunch of unpleasant stuff and now I feel horrible thanks everyone why the **** do I even bother anymore.

I'm not sure that's really helpful or therapeutic, here.

An ER is also not a psych facility, it's an acute care facility. At least in the States (and at the facilities in which I've worked), you're not involuntarily administered meds unless you've become out of control and are not able to control yourself (you're under the influence of something), you're having a medical issue where it is necessary to give meds, or you are a danger to yourself or others and less restrictive methods have proven ineffective. Meds are a last resort. I can't speak to what it's like in other countries or even in other regions of the US, but I can tell you what I know, have experienced as a patient, and have practiced.

Just from my perspective:

Several people have made suggestions on this thread and have reached out, and everything they say is shot down. Maybe they also feel like, "Why bother?" Remember, we are all essentially in the same boat.

Also, threads about self-harm or suicidal ideation (which is how this thread started out, and the tone it has taken) are incredibly triggering for people. It's why there is a rule about suicide posts. I know that there hasn't been anything terribly explicit, but this thread has gone on for over a week, with the same tone. If you are continually feeling like you want to harm yourself or others then I have to say that the advice is probably going to keep coming full circle to get help, get to the ER. If you are looking to vent then that's okay, but be aware that people may be triggered, and they may tell you so.

Other than that, how can we help you? What would you like from us?

I was not refering to the advice given i simply mean if it is upsetting you then DONT READ the thread the title is not explicit it has a trigger icon so if someone is likely to get upset eaisly then it is their responsibility to moderate what they read. But dont come on here and blame me for triggering you when you were warned and when you chose to read the thread. That is all i was refering to. I have also already said that i am just venting and if a moderator had thought waht i was posting was against the guidlines then they would have closed the thread by now. I have not said i was mad at the advie i am mad that i feel like people are acusing me of things and yelling at me for venting my feelings. I already get enough **** from people at home and i dont need it here too.

Never mind, hope you feel better soon

I dont know what you mean by never mind.....

grouphug for everybody on the BPD forum from me to you

- - -

I mean never mind what I suggested about you needing medications to help you with your thoughts and feelings. You will do what you want to do when you want to do it.

It's just so clear that you desperately need help, and there are very safe medications that would help. Your rationale for not wanting to try medications is, frankly, confusing to me.

I've been in some pretty dark places and, at that time, medications saved my life.

Really just hope you eventually reach out for the help you need and deserve.

That is what I meant. She is talking about hurting herself or others so that is the same here. She is posing a threat. I live in the South so they r very very conservative. They r still trying to get all MI patients housed in long term mental hospitals and then they will throw away the key.

Actually I rarely do what I want my OCD is very intense and I am constantly having to do things that it wants and I could easily spend 20 hours (I only get about 3 hours of sleep a night) of my day doing/thinking about OCD related things it takes me 5 hours just to get through the shower. Also I never do things for myself I am always trying to do what other people want on the off chance that they might stick around. my issue with medication is complicated. Firstly my OCD won't let me also I have had bad experiences with it in the past also I don't trust that anything is safe not to mention I don't trust doctors there are a whole bunch of other issues but I am to tired to write them at the moment.

*****THIS NEXT BIT IS GRAPHIC but I can't remember the trigger thing sorry.*****

Also when I say the OCD won't let me I am not exaggerating I cannot force myself to ingest the stuff even if you held a gun to my head I could not bring myself to take it even if you held a gun to my family's head I would not be able to take it even if you said you would kill my pets I would take it and then make myself throw up and slash open my arms to try and get the stuff out of me because I cannot bear the thought of having it inside my body. If someone injected it into me I would cut open the site of the injection and flush it out or find some way to get it out of me.

Then there's nothing anyone can do to help. The only thing you can do is vent (how does your ocd allow you to use a computer? Legitimate curiosity.) and we are here, if we are strong enough to read it. I wish you some peace, I really do. But there's nothing we can do to help you if you're so unwilling to take the help your pdoc can offer.

Do you get that you'd feel better and not be such a prisoner of the OCD? All meds have some side effects, some more or less than others. Almost everyone here, regardless of our own personal diagnoses, is on medication. We all deal with thinking it's poison (to different extents), then eventually taking it, then having to possibly adjust or switch to other meds, but feeling better.

Almost all of us here are doing better thanks to meds. Therapy is also very important and unless you're honest with your therapist it won't help much. It takes maturity, courage, and responsibility to know you're unwell and trust to others for awhile to help. I hope you'll feel better soon.

I hope you the best. I do after all the comments believe a mental health professional will have to intervene to get you healthy. I hope nothing bad happens to you. I know you will not go peacefully but once they get your condition under control you will be better. Try not to struggle too much it will be for your good. I know u don't see that right now but down the road you will know they did things in your best interest. You are so young with so much potential. Have u also posted on the OCD group. Maybe they have better advice.

Looks like from your other posts you saw ur psychologist this week. I do believe he is right and u need to see him weekly. I also think he might be right on with the dissociating. Keep going back.

Well, if it's that bad, I really don't see any way out of that.

That's really sad. I'm sorry.

It isn't an unwillingness! how many times do I have to say that I hate when people say that I really do it is like a slap in the face I am trying but everyone always only sees what I cant do not what I have been able to do even my psychologist understands that and for the record I have been being A LOT more honest with him lately and have actually told him a lot but I can't just do it all on one go. Also as for the computer I am using a tablet that no one else touches I also sometimes use my phone but even when I do if I type something wrong I have to start the sentence again and there are certain words I can't write and sometimes I have to write a particular word so it is difficult but I can't use public computers like the ones at school. But why do you care about how I use a computer that is a weird thing to ask.

I'm sorry if I've been too critical of you, or if it felt that way. I came from a family where nothing could ever be done, nothing was ever good enough, so yes it does trigger me, and you're right that in that case I shouldn't involve myself. I'm sorry about that, it's more me than you. About the computer it was just that you were saying all the things you can't do, or feel you can't do. So I was curious how you are able to do the things you feel you can do. Again, I didn't really mean to come across the way I did. I wish you wellness.

Open mouth, swallow pill. Done. You can but you choose not to. I am done with this thread. When you post online you are vulnerable to criticism.

Good luck, you need it.

I struggle with OCD related to germs and emetophobia. Medication has profoundly improved my life. Before I couldn't eat at restaurants, shake hands, touch door knobs and so on. I constantly worried about contracting norovirus or getting food poisoning. Now I don't. It has made life a lot easier.

If you let the OCD consume you life will get more and more restricted. My psychiatrist once told me the only way it will get better is if I confront the obsessions. Medication has helped me do that. A combination of medication and exposure therapy can be very helpful.

This is so true The little didgee -

If you let the OCD consume you life will get more and more restricted.

I've made this mistake from time to time.

It must be very scary to be a teenager with a major mental illness. Have u try posting on the teen page instead of here. U are probably getting responses from "mothers". The other teens may give you more of what u r looking for. They can understand your brain processes. A brain does not totally mature fully until the age of 25.
I am glad that u think ur psychologists has some positive aspects. That is where u need to stay. Note if he were ever to hurt you you are underage you could report him in a heartbeat to the board. He is not going to risk his 12 years of college training and his license to hurt you (at least most of them). They fry in a hot skillet if a professional harms a child nowadays. Not in the past but just keep the "board of psychology" phone number on your computer. You could scream bloody murder and RUN.

I too come from a family where nothing is ever good enough and maybe that is why i get so upset when people on here continue to tell me how much of a failure i am.

FOR THE LAST TIME IT IS NOT THAT SIMPLE FOR ME!
and sorry if i thought this was meant to be a support forum my memistake i guess i am wrong again. next time i go on something labled a support forum i will know to expect criticism and hurtful comments.

Thank you for being one of the 3 people on this thread that havent made me cry i wish you well.

Still I think u need to go to teen page. I am sorry that u have so many problems with your family. Can the psych talk to them? It seems like u may have a case to call "human services for neglect or abuse" if your parents are who you say they are. Of course most every teenager hates their parents thinks they don't understand etc. this is just part of growing up to be an adult. You should worried about your next boyfriend or homecoming or the college u will go to or prom, etc.

I have no idea if its ocd which keeps me from taking meds, but that sounds terrible Eden. His are your visits going? I think you are doing the right thing. Be strong