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#1
May 01, 2018, 10:05 PM
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Hello everyone, here's a question you're the best people to help with! I'm borderline, and I'm certain my adult daughter is as well (classic patterns!). What I can't figure out is how to raise the subject with her. She's also bipolar and has been lying to doctors for years to avoid the diagnosis. I know that if I suggest to her that she might be borderline, she'll flip out -- she'd take it as some sort of condemnation even though she knows I'm borderline too. She's unable to tolerate anything she perceives as criticism, often even a difference of opinion. She's in a pretty scary place right now and I would like her to have this one simple tool (the label -- oh, she hates labels!) because knowledge really is power. Thoughts?
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 Fuzzybear, MDDBPDPTSD, Skeezyks
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#2
May 02, 2018, 02:06 PM
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There's a book I saw recommended as being a "must read", in one of PsychCentral's "Ask the Therapist" columns, for anyone who has a family member with a mental illness who does not acknowledge they are ill. The title is: I'm Not Sick, I Don't Need Help. (I believe it is available for purchase on Amazon.) Here's a link to a review of the book:
A review of "I'm not sick, I don't need help!" - Friends for Mental Health Here are links to some articles, from PsychCentral's archives, on this subject as well: https://psychcentral.com/lib/how-to-...sorder-part-1/ https://psychcentral.com/lib/how-to-...sorder-part-2/ https://blogs.psychcentral.com/careg...rsen-symptoms/ https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to...essional-help/ https://psychcentral.com/blog/11-way...-denial/?all=1 https://psychcentral.com/lib/the-ess...lity-disorder/ I wish you both well... 
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"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last) |
| Fuzzybear
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#3
May 03, 2018, 06:17 PM
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Thank you, Skeezyks! That's a lot of resources, and thank you for the good wishes, too.
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#4
May 06, 2018, 11:26 PM
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I have a borderline bipolar daughter too. She knows she is but denies it often. She has run from the truth and all responsibilities too. Her children are suffering for it. She is also very entitled.
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Practicing being here now. |
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#5
May 19, 2018, 02:01 PM
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__________________
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#6
May 20, 2018, 02:59 PM
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The bottom line is: they have to find it for themselves.
My adult daughter has been suffering with anxiety and depression, and she would blow through therapists and psychiatrists--until she wanted to drive and had panic attacks behind the wheel. No amount of cajoling on my or my husband's part would help. She's now doing her own therapist and psychiatrist out of her own pocket. It's really hard to see your adult child fall apart and get into trouble, but sometimes they need that "oh, crap" moment to realize they need help. And then they have to learn on their own what you've been telling them all along. |
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#7
May 20, 2018, 08:45 PM
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I totally agree but it is extremely hard knowing that I caused part of their problems and then watch them suffer. If they had other parents they would not be mentally ill. They watched me and my failed therapies so they don't see the reward to going for treatment. UGH I try to support them as much as I am able. It just hurts.
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| Anonymous47864
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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