Someone please help me I have started to throw up once day instead of self injury like cutting to punish myself for being evil and have borderline personality disorder and need to be punished and the anger I have inside me because I have this disorder and people do not understand Iam on meds for depression and mood and Iam in therapy but hqve not talk about this yet because Ive only done it 6 or so times since March 16 for the first time I HAVE ALSO posted on the eating disorder site but I need someones opion who suffers from borderline personality disorder to tell me why we do things like this hurt ourselves besides what I have said

[Michah]

Originally Posted by loser37

Someone please help me I have started to throw up once day instead of self injury like cutting to punish myself for being evil and have borderline personality disorder and need to be punished and the anger I have inside me because I have this disorder and people do not understand Iam on meds for depression and mood and Iam in therapy but hqve not talk about this yet because Ive only done it 6 or so times since March 16 for the first time I HAVE ALSO posted on the eating disorder site but I need someones opion who suffers from borderline personality disorder to tell me why we do things like this hurt ourselves besides what I have said

Hey there, sweet cheeks........man you are having a bad time. Eating disorders are not uncommon with BPD as with self harm, impulsivity and the like.......

Are you vomiting bceause it is like purging "toxins" and the act of vomiting is quite violent and painful or are you vomiting to limit your weight as a matter of having control and a poor image of yourself? This is a very simplistic way of me wording this as I know that there are more complex issues involved in these disorders......

But some real soul searching about your motivations can help you get the courage to seek help with this.......Babe, you are escalating and we often don't have the strength or the mental clarity to change our own behaviour, ESPECIALLY as it is addictive.......please tell your T and work towards stillness.......and don't be hard on yourself.......you cannot change what has happened, it is what you do now that counts.

GET HELP!! you can do it.........turn it around and be in control of it, not it of you.

[ciefish]

wowa, you really do seem to be having a rough patch there, loser37. From my background I would say I too feel powerless, but I always try to keep hope. Its a very scary time. I'm struggling too, its not easy. My depression doesn't help matters either. I continue to have hope, to try to educate myself, develop and use a support system. I genuinely wish help and support for you. Hope my short message lifted your mood, even just a bit. Take care now, and {{hugs}} to you...