[almondjoy]

I have Bipolar and have recently started a new medication. I have had body image/weight issues in the past but always leaned more toward eating less/skipping meals when I was going through those times..

A few weeks ago, I got extremely nauseous from my medication and after a few hours, had to purge to make myself feel better. After realising how easy it was, I continued to do it (NOTE: I would take my meds afterward so I wasn't throwing them up)
It has become almost daily or every second day. I've also been trying to eat very low calorie foods and feel very bad if I eat something that isn't..

Last night, I went out to dinner and afterward pretended to call someone but instead went to the bathroom.. I didn't really want to but when I got there I just did.

When I'd gotten rid of as much as I could, and trying to get more up (after many attempts) a lot of blood came up, coated in thick saliva... I'm a bit freaked out. I need to stop this, I know, but I get the compulsion and just go and do it. At the time I want to and don't want to stop myself. I know that sounds bad. I can't tell anyone I know, either. My mum was bulimic for many years when she was younger and would have a fit if she knew. My husband wouldn't know what to do, and I don't know whether to tell my pdoc in a few weeks when I go back. I just don't know.

[glok]

Hello, almondjoy. Tell your psychiatrist what you just told us.

[bleutamales]

Hi almondjoy. Yes, please tell your psychiatrist what you told us. As soon as possible. And you would be surprised how caring your family can be. I was scared for years to tell anyone. I thought my life would come crashing down if anyone knew but just the opposite happened. Don't be like me and wait 15 years to tell someone. Bulimia is highly addictive as it gives an adrenaline rush like when you're in a car crash. So get help now sweetie. PM me anytime if you want to talk, okay?

The blood you saw was probably from purging so hard. You said you were trying and trying to get more and more up and that can burst the capillaries in your throat and mix with the saliva and look like a lot more than there really is.

Take care of yourself okay hon?

[waggiedog]

Hello there dear Almondjoy. Yes darling, I sure do understand where you are coming from. I'm 55 and have had all of the eating disorders over the years, for now it's severe restricting. The blood you saw was probably when your finger nails scratched the back of your throat BUT, I'm not a Dr so I can't say for sure. You know, bulimia is dangerous, it's the hidden killer because folk tend to be of ''normal'' weight. I agree with the person here who said tell your Psych Dr, it's sound advice. If you ever need an ear, I'll be happy to lend mine to you ~ message me if you need to hunny. HUGS. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX