What is wrong with me?

I served in the Army and I have seen war, and even had a battle die in my hands. The only problem is I think I've handled it way to well. I mean I still have flash backs of battle but I don't freak out and try to hurt others or myself. Is this normal? I don't think so...

Hi, JHarmon

Jmo, but handled it way too well can be a euphemism for Stuffing It.
If you are having flashbacks then it's likely you have PTSD.
Because you are not freaking out doesn't mean you don't have it.

J, normal means different things to different people...
Sharing that you don't think your reaction is normal might be reason for you to look more closely at what is happening.

Do you have counseling available to you? It can help a great deal to talk it over with someone face to face.
Peer to peer groups are also safe places in addition to the counseling...

Cap

hi j and welcome to pc! since you are a vet i believe you can use the VA for an assessment re ptsd.(my son is career military. that's why i know). he came home from iraq 3 times and suffered from ptsd every time.
we all respond to trauma differently but like capp said you may have stuffed it and it will eventually surface. glad you shared with us and posed the question. it may help some other vets here at pc to open up too. take care and yes, i'd follow up on this.

Are you having problems in your day to day functioning?

Thanks for replying, but no I don't have any benifits with the VA. I tried to get help from them and they denied me. They said I only have a 2% disablity and to go away, and the 2% came from me busting my ankle jumping out of a helicopter trying to save a battle buddy.

Per my own experience, you sometimes have to bite them to get the help you need...don't give up, J, don't give up.

Colorado? In relation to your location:
Where is the nearest VA facility?
Military Installation?

Are you familiar with IAVA?
Iraqi/Afghanistan Veterans of America.
They have a website with a boatload of information that can benefit you. There is information available about the closest resources for you to contact--there is also other info that will help you.
I've been a supporter for a few years. This is the organization that helped push through increased GI educational benefits.

PM if you'd like, J.
I've been there, done that

Peace,
Cap

Many states fund a VA office for each county. I've found them very helpful.

When I called the regional VA offices, I was advised that they couldn't tell me the kinds of things I might qualify for, against the law for them to reveal it .. can you imagine?

Anyway, the county offices are charged by the state to assist with identifying what you're qualified for and helping you get it....well, that's my understanding, anyway.