Is a big trigger for me, is there a way off of ignore? It's triggering me again already

[seesaw]

The ignore function is set up for the safety of members. So whoever has you on ignore is doing so because you trigger them. You just have to learn to not take it personally. It doesn't make you a bad person or anything, it just means something you do or say triggers them. You just have to let it go and accept that you can't be everyone's friend. Think of it as an exercise in coping.

If I can add a different example that might help. One poster used to write threads about a dying relative which reminded me of my father. I couldn't bear to read them or even see that person's name in another unrelated thread. So I put them on ignore. Not because I didn't like them or whatever. Just that their hurt and suffering reminded me of my own. Some issues or topics we just can't face. It isn't the person.

Originally Posted by Little Cat

If I can add a different example that might help. One poster used to write threads about a dying relative which reminded me of my father. I couldn't bear to read them or even see that person's name in another unrelated thread. So I put them on ignore. Not because I didn't like them or whatever. Just that their hurt and suffering reminded me of my own. Some issues or topics we just can't face. It isn't the person.

Very well put.

(((((WhisperShadow)))))

I can't face being on any ignore list though, it triggers me cause of stuff that happened on a different forum, basically long story short I was on forced ignore with another member there, other member blatantly ignored it with nothing happening to them (they was admin's pet - forum version of teacher's pet), ignore broke, I messaged a mod to say ignore's broke, next thing I know I had admin yelling at me in PM literally just for letting a mod know ignore was broke cause apparently it was my fault and I never found out how it was my fault (and at no point did I interact with admin's pet since I got told to put her on ignore there, she was the one who kept replying to my threads and kept messaging me in the chat room and kept lying about me to the moderators etc)

That's why ignore's a trigger for me and I better get this posted before I change my mind and end up deleting it

[seesaw]

Originally Posted by whispershadow

I can't face being on any ignore list though, it triggers me cause of stuff that happened on a different forum, basically long story short I was on forced ignore with another member there, other member blatantly ignored it with nothing happening to them (they was admin's pet - forum version of teacher's pet), ignore broke, I messaged a mod to say ignore's broke, next thing I know I had admin yelling at me in PM literally just for letting a mod know ignore was broke cause apparently it was my fault and I never found out how it was my fault (and at no point did I interact with admin's pet since I got told to put her on ignore there, she was the one who kept replying to my threads and kept messaging me in the chat room and kept lying about me to the moderators etc)

That's why ignore's a trigger for me and I better get this posted before I change my mind and end up deleting it

This forum is not that forum. I suspect that these people placed you on ignore of their own volition and not that you have been directed to ignore them by the admins. So this situation is quite different. This site attempts to give a blanket approach to dealing with triggers. The other solution is to walk away and do self care, not make other people responsible for your triggers, which is essentially what you are asking for by asking admin to remove you from other people's ignore list.

We.can all agree that there are things, in general, that are triggering, such as graphic content or suicidal talk. Other things, we have to be responsible for ourselves. There are many resources on this site for coping with emotions and emotional triggers. Sabby typically has great advice on this front. I suggest trying to use some of those coping techniques to deal with your personal triggers.

[MickeyCheeky]

Don't take it too hard

And what I said above is only the tip of the iceberg, 2012 I had so much crap going on that being on ignore basically triggers memories of that time of my life as well as reminding me of that forum

Domestic abuse, having to give my much loved male cat away, having to basically run with family within hours to protect ourselfs from something serious that happened, having a online stalker, need I carry on?

Although domestic abuse may of been the year before, I really don't remember too well

And I have not posted anything like suicide or anything like that, worst I did was weeks ago make self harm comments but I have not repeated that

[seesaw]

Originally Posted by whispershadow

And what I said above is only the tip of the iceberg, 2012 I had so much crap going on that being on ignore basically triggers memories of that time of my life as well as reminding me of that forum

Domestic abuse, having to give my much loved male cat away, having to basically run with family within hours to protect ourselfs from something serious that happened, having a online stalker, need I carry on?

Although domestic abuse may of been the year before, I really don't remember too well

And I have not posted anything like suicide or anything like that, worst I did was weeks ago make self harm comments but I have not repeated that

Are you seeing a therapist?

Originally Posted by seesaw

Are you seeing a therapist?

I did see a therapist at the time but all he cared about was how much money he was going to get paid and he'd sit there doodling, where I've moved to there is no help in the National Hoax Service

Originally Posted by whispershadow

I can't face being on any ignore list though, it triggers me cause of stuff that happened on a different forum, basically long story short I was on forced ignore with another member there, other member blatantly ignored it with nothing happening to them (they was admin's pet - forum version of teacher's pet), ignore broke, I messaged a mod to say ignore's broke, next thing I know I had admin yelling at me in PM literally just for letting a mod know ignore was broke cause apparently it was my fault and I never found out how it was my fault (and at no point did I interact with admin's pet since I got told to put her on ignore there, she was the one who kept replying to my threads and kept messaging me in the chat room and kept lying about me to the moderators etc)

That's why ignore's a trigger for me and I better get this posted before I change my mind and end up deleting it

I am so sorry that ignore is a trigger for you

ignore is a trigger for me too, not for the same reasons, for me it's.. if one person puts me on ignore, just one, it makes me feel worthless and horrible- and like I am no good for people- and not worth the forum's time.

Originally Posted by raging vortex

I am so sorry that ignore is a trigger for you

ignore is a trigger for me too, not for the same reasons, for me it's.. if one person puts me on ignore, just one, it makes me feel worthless and horrible- and like I am no good for people- and not worth the forum's time.

raging, you are worth the forum's time

Unlike dirty scumbag here

Originally Posted by whispershadow

raging, you are worth the forum's time

Unlike dirty scumbag here

((((hugs))))

[Calla lily12]

Yes ignore triggers me also for a different reason. It's a huge rejection to me. I makes me terribly self destructive when I'm rejected because I feel so worthless and despised.
I get it...really hugs

Please can I have this thread locked in forum jail and the key thrown away so I can try and move past this?

[TheWell]

Thread closed at the request of the OP