[Trace14]

Since I'm kind of new to this whole therapy thing. I was just wondering if your T talked about your traumas at some point. The T I'm seeing now doesn't ask any questions about the past, she asks about the DBT training, that she's facilitating, asks if I'm homicidal or suicidal , am I taking my meds like I am suppose to, etc. Is this just a get to know you period or does talking about the past traumas even matter?

[ThisWayOut]

Different modalities focus on different things. Cbt/dbt tends to focus on dealing with the present. Other therapies focus on the therapeutic relationship, or on how the past has shaped you as a person...
Generally, it is not believed necessary to talk in detail about trauma, but some clients or therapists may focus more on it depending on what they feel they can handle.
I had a cbt therapist who initially was ok hearing about it, but quickly refocused to the present and how to handle current stresses (she was burnt out on the job). That didn't work out so well for me, since my past kept hitting me like a ton of bricks. I've had other t's who jumped right in to talking about it, and current t just follows my lead (if I talk about it, then ok. If not, that's ok too)...

I guess it ultimately comes down to whether or not you want to be talking about it. Some people process their trauma indirectly. They never talk in detail about it and seem to do fine. Other people (like myself) benefit more from talking about it (maybe sometimes too much at once because I flood myself unintentionally)... It's about figuring out what you need to be able to move through it, and doing that.

What are you leaning towards for yourself?

[Trace14]

Originally Posted by ThisWayOut

Different modalities focus on different things. Cbt/dbt tends to focus on dealing with the present. Other therapies focus on the therapeutic relationship, or on how the past has shaped you as a person...
Generally, it is not believed necessary to talk in detail about trauma, but some clients or therapists may focus more on it depending on what they feel they can handle.
I had a cbt therapist who initially was ok hearing about it, but quickly refocused to the present and how to handle current stresses (she was burnt out on the job). That didn't work out so well for me, since my past kept hitting me like a ton of bricks. I've had other t's who jumped right in to talking about it, and current t just follows my lead (if I talk about it, then ok. If not, that's ok too)...

I guess it ultimately comes down to whether or not you want to be talking about it. Some people process their trauma indirectly. They never talk in detail about it and seem to do fine. Other people (like myself) benefit more from talking about it (maybe sometimes too much at once because I flood myself unintentionally)... It's about figuring out what you need to be able to move through it, and doing that.

What are you leaning towards for yourself?

<<What are you leaning towards for yourself? >> What do you mean?

[leomama]

Originally Posted by Trace14

Since I'm kind of new to this whole therapy thing. I was just wondering if your T talked about your traumas at some point. The T I'm seeing now doesn't ask any questions about the past, she asks about the DBT training, that she's facilitating, asks if I'm homicidal or suicidal , am I taking my meds like I am suppose to, etc. Is this just a get to know you period or does talking about the past traumas even matter?

Hi Trace I missed this one. Based on what you've told me about what the vet admin offers I don't think its going to go deeper then this. I'm surprised the VA offers DBT without any kind of in-depth individual therapy.

I don't get asked any of those questions when I see my p nurse or my t.

I really feel for you.

[Trace14]

Originally Posted by leomama

Hi Trace I missed this one. Based on what you've told me about what the vet admin offers I don't think its going to go deeper then this. I'm surprised the VA offers DBT without any kind of in-depth individual therapy.

I don't get asked any of those questions when I see my p nurse or my t.

I really feel for you.

I just thought therapy was about getting to the core of issues then working on it. If you don't know what's going on with the person how can you treat them? I would venture to say that the people here know more about me than my T. We can see the notes from the DBT and some therapy by going into our file. You can tell the answers are the same every time, just copy and paste.
Is DBT considered therapy or like a skills class?

[leomama]

Originally Posted by Trace14

I just thought therapy was about getting to the core of issues then working on it. If you don't know what's going on with the person how can you treat them? I would venture to say that the people here know more about me than my T. We can see the notes from the DBT and some therapy by going into our file. You can tell the answers are the same every time, just copy and paste.

Is DBT considered therapy or like a skills class?

It is a skills class. That is really dismal. Have you thought about talking to your therapist about this? Do you have any other health insurance besides the VA? Or there any agencies that offer therapy on a sliding scale? I don't see how can make any progress with only see a t once every 2-3 months.

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[ThisWayOut]

Originally Posted by Trace14

<<What are you leaning towards for yourself? >> What do you mean?

Do you feel life you should be talking more about what happened?

[Trace14]

Originally Posted by ThisWayOut

Do you feel life you should be talking more about what happened?

Yes, I think it's part of wanting to be understood. To put the truth out there so they will know where I've been and what I need to do deal with these issues.
It's like putting a band aide on an infected wound.

[Trace14]

Originally Posted by leomama

It is a skills class. That is really dismal. Have you thought about talking to your therapist about this? Do you have any other health insurance besides the VA? Or there any agencies that offer therapy on a sliding scale? I don't see how can make any progress with only see a t once every 2-3 months.

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No insurance, no job= lack of resources

[leomama]

Originally Posted by Trace14

No insurance, no job= lack of resources

I understand , I guess the VA prevents you from getting Medicare or state health insurance .

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[DechanDawa]

Originally Posted by Trace14

No insurance, no job= lack of resources

Meditation and talking with a meditation instructor might help. You could find a meditation center, but also request one-on-one instruction from a certified instructor, and this is usually offered at (Buddhist) meditation centers for free. You don't have to become Buddhist. The thing about this is that any certified instructor who is authentic will be willing to discuss your trauma with you, as Buddhism teaches one to "lean into" painful stuff rather than ignoring it. The Buddhist nun Pema Chodron has written some good books on this. But if you want to do meditation for purely secular reasons then insist on it. Don't let anyone tell you that you need to study Buddhism in order to become a meditator. It isn't true. In general, however, Buddhist meditators have absolutely no problem discussing trauma and working with trauma. Good luck.

[Trace14]

Originally Posted by DechanDawa

Meditation and talking with a meditation instructor might help. You could find a meditation center, but also request one-on-one instruction from a certified instructor, and this is usually offered at (Buddhist) meditation centers for free. You don't have to become Buddhist. The thing about this is that any certified instructor who is authentic will be willing to discuss your trauma with you, as Buddhism teaches one to "lean into" painful stuff rather than ignoring it. The Buddhist nun Pema Chodron writes some good books on this. But if you want to do meditation for purely secular reasons then insist on that. Don't let anyone tell you that you need to study Buddhism in order to become a meditator. It isn't true. In general, however, Buddhist meditators have absolutely no problem discussing trauma and working with trauma. Good luck.

We tried a meditation/relaxation meditation in the DBT class. Though when I close my flashes of past traumas take over, it's like a continuous slide show. But thanks, for the information maybe meditation is something you have to work at.

[DechanDawa]

Originally Posted by Trace14

We tried a meditation/relaxation meditation in the DBT class. Though when I close my flashes of past traumas take over, it's like a continuous slide show. But thanks, for the information maybe meditation is something you have to work at.

It sounds like you absolutely need to talk about it. That is what your meditation experience is telling you. Are you a vet?

[leomama]

Meditation is very hard. There is an app called insight timer that my last therapist told me about before she left. There is also headspace. A YouTube channel I like is Jason Stephenson.

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[Trace14]

Originally Posted by DechanDawa

It sounds like you absolutely need to talk about it. That is what your meditation experience is telling you. Are you a vet?

That should have been close my eyes, guess you figured that out. Yes, I'm a vet and currently getting treatment through the VA.

[Trace14]

Originally Posted by leomama

Meditation is very hard. There is an app called insight timer that my last therapist told me about before she left. There is also headspace. A YouTube channel I like is Jason Stephenson.

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Have you tried it? Practice it now?

[leomama]

Originally Posted by Trace14

Have you tried it? Practice it now?

I have, I lapsed, but my therapist made me promise her today that I would meditate every morning .

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[Trace14]

Originally Posted by leomama

I have, I lapsed, but my therapist made me promise her today that I would meditate every morning .

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How do you keep from falling asleep?

[leomama]

Originally Posted by Trace14

How do you keep from falling asleep?

I do it when I wake up, it's a way of calming down . I can also do yoga ahead of time.

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[DechanDawa]

Originally Posted by Trace14

How do you keep from falling asleep?

This reply is meant for Trace14:

If you are falling asleep it could mean two things. The first is that sometimes sleepiness is a way of ignoring getting close to what is in our heart and mind. Secondly, you are too tired to be meditating! Instead, sleep! Or get up and move around and try again.

In a Boston program they found meditation did not help veterans with deep trauma, and meditation could actually make it worse, for reasons you stated.

If the trauma is coming up as soon as you start to meditate...it is indicating that the trauma wants "to be heard."

Have you looked into an informal vets group? Or...maybe starting one on meetup? We have one in my town...for vets alone...a support group...that meets at the library.

So please hang in there until you find some help. Although DBT skills can't hurt, your therapist should be addressing the trauma issues with you, as well.

You could also try "walking meditation" which is just incorporating movement while letting thoughts come up and then letting them"be" - and then letting them fall away. Sometimes walking is a really good way to meditate...and for you...because of sleepiness...it would definitely be advised.

[leomama]

I don't fall asleep.

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[DechanDawa]

Originally Posted by leomama

I don't fall asleep.

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So sorry, my reply was meant for Trace14, not you. I posted it wrong.

[DechanDawa]

Meditation is not really that hard. After all, it is just sitting with our thoughts. But often we are used to ignoring our thoughts. In the case of cPTSD the thoughts insist on being heard.

Most people don't continue meditating if a lot of unresolved issues keep coming up. That is why it is much better to find someone to work with -- or really two people --- a certified meditation instructor and a therapist.

"Meditation Light" might work for people with moderate anxiety. But trauma and other issues need different kinds of attention.

If someone with cPTSD works with a therapist, the therapist should be made aware that meditation and other mindfulness and DBT practices might very well be like someone suggesting putting a band aid on a festering wound. It is cruel.

[ThisWayOut]

Originally Posted by Trace14

We tried a meditation/relaxation meditation in the DBT class. Though when I close my flashes of past traumas take over, it's like a continuous slide show. But thanks, for the information maybe meditation is something you have to work at.

If mediation is triggering, I would suggest avoiding it until you are at a place where you can handle the triggers. There's a bunch of reservation and studies out about the possible problems with mediation for trauma and abuse survivors. For some, meditation can be a wonderful way to deal with trauma. Unfortunately, for others it can actually be retraumatizing...

[ThisWayOut]

I totally get what you mean about needing to talk about it. I finally have a steady enough therapist (don't plan on switching t"s again any time soon) to feel like I can get somewhere. I also really like that analogy of not being able to talk about it akin to putting a bandaid on a festering wound.

I'm sorry you are so limited in resources... I had that problem when I moved down south. I had no job, and no insurance. I didn't qualify for state aid (can't even remember the reason they gave me anymore). I was able to find a sliding scale clinic to work with. It kinda sucked because the t was done with his practicum after 8 months,but at least I was able to see someone for that time. I'm not sure if there's anything like that near where you are (or if they'd see a problem with you going to the VA and also to a free/ sliding scale clinic...), but it might be an option.

Was there an option of switching therapists within the VA? I think I remember you saying you weren't sure if you wanted to have to start over again, but it might be more bellflower than continually feeling like you aren't getting what you need from therapy.