Having Trouble Talking

I'm having issues speaking. I feel so much more closed off than ever before. I can't talk to people I'm supposed to trust. It's not even that I don't trust them.

I don't know. I feel so distant from everybody. Cut off from the present. What happened, all of it, is over. It's done. And yet, I'm still back there.

People around me don't get that. They don't understand what this is like. How could they? They didn't live with it. I don't blame them but that's not the point. The point is that I feel so alone.

I'm defective. No one can repair me. And I'm alone.

I have days like that. It's really hard. You're not alone!

I appreciate that.

I just feel like people on this particular forum are the only ones who get it. Who understand why I can't sleep at night, why I have nightmares and why I can't talk about the things I need to talk about.

I know you're here but I still feel so alone. I'm sorry, I'm a little messed up right now. My head isn't right.

So leigheas, you are not alone, there are a lot of us out here that are in your corner . Try to find folks that have been there , they understand. Keep talkin' it out, its important. There are times when I feel like I'm living in a parallel universe, everyone around me is living in Disney World. That is when I have a long conversation with my dogs . They understand. . Find a passion , and go after it.....Shalom.

That's good advise. Thank you for that.

It really does feel like I'm living in a parallel universe. One in which I watch everyone else live in a world that's care free and sunny. Then I look around at mine and see all this suffering. I feel so detached from everyone else. Not that I'd want any of them to join me. Where I'm at sucks.

((((( So leigheas )))))